I'm 14 and know everything so AMA

[Daboomboom]

In my 14 years on this earth I have gained more experience and knowledge than anyone else ever so AMA because I will know.

Are you my niece? She likes to declare every Christmas that she is the most intelligent person in the family. Then we do the Christmas quiz and she makes a tit of herself because she knows absolutely nothing 😆 Storms out and accuses us all of cheating.

I don't believe you because my 12 year old DD actually knows more than anyone, ever, and she reminds me of this on a daily basis, soooooooo ......

Right 🤣

😂💜

Ah, I remember when I was 14 and knew everything. It took me at least 2 years to realize that I knew nothing! In the meantime I was very obnoxious. Don't be like me.

Do you think the same as my friend's son, that revision is a form of cheating? It did not go well for him.

We really need the laugh emoji back.

Can you believe your mum genuinely might have worn little floral crop tops, baggy wide jeans and DMs in the 90s? Your mum claims she did, but OBVIOUSLY did not because both parents dress like an old man from Mountain Warehouse now.

And also your mum tried to tell you that bright red nail varnish was old fashioned in the 90s and the reason you like it now is because 50 year old women now wear blue and green and fashions change. So she clearly knows nothing because red nail varnish is in now and never has been fashionable before in the history of the world.

Why do you refuse to acknowledge my presence in the house at all, UNLESS I have to start work in one minute, in which case you tell me all about your friends, your relationships, your thoughts on society, your take on AI, but then and only then.

Why are your school shoes all ruined at the back and why is there toothpaste all over the sink?

A wise child once told me that being good at quizzes doesn't mean you're smart. It just means you've been alive for a very long time and remember things like the moon landing happening.

I fear that you need money, are you chronically short on funds? Do you have any plans for getting the money you desperately need? Other than your thick mum of course, she clearly can't be trusted to get the simplest thing right.

I'm so sorry, deeply truly.

Oh and how come you don’t reply to my WhatsApps for several hours but if I don’t respond to you within 30 seconds then I get 5 messages in quick succession saying mum? Mum?? Why aren’t you answering??

you think you know everything, wait until you are 16 and you will realise how little you do know now…. My 16 year olds knows everything and like to remind me at least eleventy-six times a day!

Everi day? 🙄🙄🙄
Av u cawled the socials? I wud
Hold on I’ve got da numbra for child line somewear bbz

Why do you inhale the home made meals I cook and then demand frozen chicken nuggets and fries for your mates when they come over?
I HATE beige food!

You don't say? I mean, obviously ALL the 14 year olds are on Mumsnet. It's where it's at.

Can you tell me why you choose clothes that you absolutely LOVE and then refuse to wear them the second the tags are removed?

And why is that school games shirt you got, FOR FREE, in Y6 still your most worn top in Y9???

Why does it take u days/weeks to bring down all ur rubbish, plates and dirty clothes and why cant you wash them?

Why does every word have an a on the end?
As in nnnoooooaaa,
Godaaaaa and why do u call me bro when im your mother?

And why when u have a wardrobe 3 times thre size of mine do u use your bedroom floor to store them?

How many years does a mortgage run for and what's the interest rate.? Little miss know it all! Give mum back your pocket money to help with expenses!

Why are all the plates and bowls and knives and forks in your room and why do you eat every thing in the fridge but leave the empty packets in there? hmm 🤔

This thread made me laugh. I need that (just don't ask 🙈😂). So thank you. It's been 9 years since I had a 14 year old living with me. 13 years since it was a 14 year old girl...but it all came flooding back 😂

I see Melania has left the Whitehouse laptop unsupervised again!