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Argument with DH over a bath

165 replies

Bells2323 · 29/12/2023 12:27

Just had a screaming match with my DH and I want to know if I am being unreasonable or not.

I had a bath in the morning around 11. He was in the bedroom as I having a shower.
At 12 I went into the bath again, and he asked again if I was having a bath. I didn’t answer, he asked again and I didn’t answer because he should have know that I wasn’t having a bath as I had one in the morning.

When I came into the bedroom, he started shouting at me for not answering and I started shouting at him for asking, what I think is a stupid question. He said he didn’t remember; I think he didn’t remember but was asking just to annoy me.
He went downstairs, muttering to himself about me.

OP posts:
HardcoreLadyType · 29/12/2023 13:25

Horriblewoman · 29/12/2023 13:14

I have no idea if my husband has showered yet today, he said he was going to have one 30 mins ago but I haven’t been paying attention to see if he actually has so I would be your husband in this situation just checking.

You, to use an awful mumsnet expression, sound like hard work.

If he’s anything like my husband he will announce he’s having a bath about 4 times before he actually does so.

(Fortunately for all, he never has showers, only baths.)

Therealjudgejudy · 29/12/2023 13:25

You sound extremely childish, and your relationship sounds awful. Doomed even.

GreyBlackLove · 29/12/2023 13:25

Scrantonicity2 this frustrates the life out of me too!

Getamoveon36 · 29/12/2023 13:26

You sound so very rude.

Jf20 · 29/12/2023 13:27

Sera1989 · 29/12/2023 13:24

Oh yes, me too! But I wouldn't either start the shouting or shout back, I would question why our fuses are so short

True, I’d not shout but I would likely snap,at him to be fair.

DoesMaryNotDrive · 29/12/2023 13:28

Bells2323 · 29/12/2023 12:38

Sorry, I had a shower at 11am. At 12, I went into the bathroom again, DH asked if I was having a bath/ shower or not. I didn’t answer because he knew I had a shower at 11am, so why ask me if I am having another shower when I am obviously not.

I’m guessing there’s a history of him asking you inane questions that he already knows the answer to and you finally had enough?

If yes, I can see why you ignored him. And if this is the case, don’t be disheartened by the responses here, most MNers can’t see beyond the end of their own nose. Flowers

RainsweptAndUninteresting · 29/12/2023 13:29

Was it worth posting about ?
Seriously...was it?

lalaland2024 · 29/12/2023 13:30

AutumnFroglets · 29/12/2023 12:48

If fucking annoys me when people don't answer a simple question.

Why didn't you answer him? It only required a yes or no answer.

Same. Cannot stand being blatantly ignored. No need for it.

BeingATwatItsABingThing · 29/12/2023 13:30

Wow! I cannot comprehend getting this worked up about my DH not knowing if I’ve had a bath or shower. Ignoring him was rude and I’d be pissed off too if my DH just ignored me for asking a question he thought was obvious.

GreenIsMyFavoriteColour · 29/12/2023 13:32

Occasionally I ask my DH a question and he decides what I really want to know is something slightly different, so replies to that question instead, but I did actually want to know what I originally asked, so his answer doesn't help

This boils my piss, too.

Q: "Do we need cheese?"
A: "There's ham in the fridge."

DoesMaryNotDrive · 29/12/2023 13:32

AutumnFroglets · 29/12/2023 12:48

If fucking annoys me when people don't answer a simple question.

Why didn't you answer him? It only required a yes or no answer.

When you last went to the bathroom, did you have a shit or a wee or a bath?

TooMuchPinkyPonkJuice · 29/12/2023 13:32

Bells2323 · 29/12/2023 12:38

Sorry, I had a shower at 11am. At 12, I went into the bathroom again, DH asked if I was having a bath/ shower or not. I didn’t answer because he knew I had a shower at 11am, so why ask me if I am having another shower when I am obviously not.

Confusing bath story aside, why not just answer him? He could have forgotten or thought he mis-remembered. You must really hate him to treat him with such disdain

TinyTyrantsSnackb1tch · 29/12/2023 13:33

Maybe your OH needed in for a poop?

DewHopper · 29/12/2023 13:33

OP you were oddly rude. Your DH should not have shouted at you though. Hope that you are ok.

VainAbigail · 29/12/2023 13:34

I had a bath in the morning around 11. He was in the bedroom as I having a shower.

Confusing.

At 12 I went into the bath again, and he asked again if I was having a bath. I didn’t answer

Why did you go in again?

he should have know that I wasn’t having a bath

You literally just wrote “At 12 I went into the bath again”!!!

he started shouting at me for not answering

Because it’s rude to ignore people perhaps?

why ask me if I am having another shower when I am obviously not.

It really isn’t as obvious as you think, hence why so many people replying are just as confused as your husband.

How fucking petty

Pootle23 · 29/12/2023 13:35

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This made me laugh so hard

No Way Lol GIF by Hello All
369damnshesfine · 29/12/2023 13:36

It sounds like you need to grow up.

He asked you a simple question and you refused to answer.

Do not goad someone into shouting by giving them the silent treatment and then complain on here to try and get people to back you up.
It’s very twisted behaviour.

Glitterblue · 29/12/2023 13:38

The whole thing is just odd. It makes no sense. You said you had a bath then a shower then went into the bath again in your OP but then changed it. There’s no need for a screaming match over it, I can understand your DH being pissed off when you didn’t answer him. You sound very strange.

AnneValentine · 29/12/2023 13:38

You had a bath at 11.

a shower at 12.

And then treated OH like sh*t for asking if you were back in the bath.

YABVVVVU.

Glitterblue · 29/12/2023 13:39

VainAbigail · 29/12/2023 13:34

I had a bath in the morning around 11. He was in the bedroom as I having a shower.

Confusing.

At 12 I went into the bath again, and he asked again if I was having a bath. I didn’t answer

Why did you go in again?

he should have know that I wasn’t having a bath

You literally just wrote “At 12 I went into the bath again”!!!

he started shouting at me for not answering

Because it’s rude to ignore people perhaps?

why ask me if I am having another shower when I am obviously not.

It really isn’t as obvious as you think, hence why so many people replying are just as confused as your husband.

How fucking petty

Exactly this. I’m confused. None of it makes any sense!

VictoriasSponges · 29/12/2023 13:40

I had a bath in the morning around 11. He was in the bedroom as I having a shower.
At 12 I went into the bath again, and he asked again if I was having a bath.

This doesn't make sense.

You had a bath? A shower? Another bath?

DoesMaryNotDrive · 29/12/2023 13:40

AnneValentine · 29/12/2023 13:38

You had a bath at 11.

a shower at 12.

And then treated OH like sh*t for asking if you were back in the bath.

YABVVVVU.

She didn’t though. OP just had a shower. Many people use the terms bath and shower interchangeably, possibly because she had the shower in the bathtub.

ImCamembertTheBigCheese · 29/12/2023 13:40

So what's the context? Background of what has been going on recently?

Most people would have replied 'No, had a shower this morning' and assumed their other half had had a brain fart and forgotten.

369damnshesfine · 29/12/2023 13:41

DoesMaryNotDrive · 29/12/2023 13:28

I’m guessing there’s a history of him asking you inane questions that he already knows the answer to and you finally had enough?

If yes, I can see why you ignored him. And if this is the case, don’t be disheartened by the responses here, most MNers can’t see beyond the end of their own nose. Flowers

It’s not an inane question though.

He may not have realised she’d already showered or she may be someone who has period pains or an illness/disability which requires extra bathing and therefore it’s normal to have more than one wash a day.

If he knew she was going for a soak in the bath, he probably would have quickly gone to the toilet like most people do when someone’s going for a soak.

All she had to say was yes or no.
It’s not difficult.

VictoriasSponges · 29/12/2023 13:41

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