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Original poster

Intense dejavu episode

497 replies

flowngo · 02/10/2023 21:26

Posting for traffic as spooked -

Have spoken to my best friend who's a GP but also posting to see if anyone has experienced similar.

This eve was waiting for my boyfriend to ring me to catch up about some future plans, we had been together with my child earlier this eve, low key dinner and chill time, no alcohol etc.
around 2030 I thought I will just go up to bed (out of character for me at 2030) and he can wake me up to chat later on. As I thought this, I had a phone call from him, except it was like a pocket dial as he sounded a little far away but he was saying things like "...stripper pole and don't give me any bullshit about not drinking, I know you drank in Barcelona" - of course I was immediately thinking is he ok, has he been drinking, who is he talking to, what's going on. I hung up and immediately texted to say call me asap, and googled intense deja vu to see what on earth was happening. The words were consistent with something we would have a bit of a row about a good while back.

He rang me and said he hadn't realised he had pocket dialled me, and was confused about the narrative I had heard.
Of course I was completely spooked by this, my friend said to contact the GP tomorrow morning, I know that Neuro won't see me overnight at ED so unless I have any symptoms of an upcoming seizure I'm not sure what to do!

OP posts:
Freysimo · 03/10/2023 07:44

passiveaggressivenonsense · 03/10/2023 04:57

He did actually dial you. The most logical explanation is he was talking to someone else about a similar incident that he'd talked to you about. If he's having an affair or talking to an ex it's likely that the same issues/ arguments would come up.

He could have been talking to the delivery guy?

AriannasGuitarCase · 03/10/2023 07:47

I had both deja vu episodes and auditory hallucinations (although much shorter than what you're describing) caused by a chronic B12 deficiency

1month · 03/10/2023 07:47

Sorry NRTFT

What you experienced wasn’t deja vu.

What likely happened was that he pocket dialled you and you were trying to work out what he was saying and filled in the blanks with a conversation you already had.

I’m sure there’s a name for it but you don’t have to worry about some psychotic episode, unless you’ve had other issues.

You were tired which is why you went to bed early and you’ve had a viral infection, both of which can mess with our brains.

I remember someone pocket dialled me and I could have sworn they were with a woman bitching about me.
He then turned up at my home in a taxi at the same time I was listening and it was him and a male taxi driver.

It was weird because if I had not seen it with my own eyes I would have been certain he was with another woman laughing and bitching behind my back.
I never get paranoid either.
I remember being really tired at that time too.

greenhydrangea · 03/10/2023 07:48

But the butt dial actually happened.

The idea someone would start misappropriating the notion of deja vu, wonder if they were hallucinating (coincidentally for the same precise amount of time of the butt dial), worry they had had a seizure, call a GP friend, consider going to the ED, decide they will see their GP and talk to some neuro/shrink colleagues about it, rather than face the very likely possibility they heard what they heard...
Or heard largely what they heard and misheard a few words... Just because this newish DP "isn't like that"... is so bizarre.

He was either ranting out loud, "to you", saying what he still feels and wanted to say better back then, in his home as he unpacked his shopping, perhaps stirred up by anticipating this future holiday with tyou.

He was ranting about you, complaining to someone else - either a male friend, or a female friend - "and I said to her"....

Or he was ranting at some other woman, about a topic you have previously argued about.

1month · 03/10/2023 07:48

In my case it was the radio playing in the background mixed with his and the taxi driver’s conversations and my brain fulled in the blanks.

AriannasGuitarCase · 03/10/2023 07:48

flowngo · 02/10/2023 22:54

More word finding issues than usual, increased tiredness but not a lot else. I am extremely familiar (on a daily basis) with brain tumour symptoms etc and I don't feel convinced it's that but given how my mum presented I think it's fair for me to feel like this.

No psych hx for me but bi polar on my dads side over 2 generations.

Show quote history

Word finding issues can also be a symptom of B12 deficiency

inamarina · 03/10/2023 07:51

SurpriseItsMeHorseyNeighNeigh · 02/10/2023 23:27

Make it make sense. you were not tired but felt the need to go to bed at 20.30 when it is not like you to go to bed so early?

Show quote history

Also, while expecting a phone call Confused

SuperCam · 03/10/2023 07:51

flowngo · 03/10/2023 07:42

It really did spook me. Maybe nobody else would be concerned if their DP went from calm to suddenly ranting about a past topic in an aggressive monotone?

Show quote history

It’s clear it spooked you! But that’s still a long list of reactions. Most people wouldn’t instantly think they should have a chat with neuro or ring a GP on the spot.

How long have you been with your DP?

Do you have any diagnosed conditions?

NonMiDispiace · 03/10/2023 07:54

@winteriscoming2022 that’s what I think too, anything else is illogical.
@SuperCam quite frankly the reaction is so extreme isn’t it?

Surely the simplest thing to do is ask the boyfriend if he was discussing it with someone or talking to himself or if it is a recording (which is more likely than déja vu, epilepsy, brain tumour etc)?

Either you move on OP or call it a day, your level of anxiety is unsustainable. You clearly don’t trust him either way.

Temporaryname158 · 03/10/2023 07:55

There’s a lot going on here

you seem to have a history with the hospital, they have his number on file, you’ve sought help thre before and are very anxious in regard to your health - are you well OP? Have you been mentally and physically well historically?

then there’s your boyfriend. You claim he is an Angel however you term previous argument's as him ranting at you and he got angry about a silly thing, you not wanting to drink. That isn’t really cause for an argument. How many other argument's did you have? About what?

did you have any of these episodes prior to meeting him?

it feels strange you feel you have a medical problem with no basis for this, yet have a boyfriend who seems a little odd to me!

Original poster
flowngo · 03/10/2023 07:56

The thing is I wasn't tired at 2030 so I don't know why I thought it would be a good idea to try and sleep then and await a phone call. Wouldn't normally do that.

I do have a family hx of brain tumours, bi-polar and my dad had a stroke at only 40 so I do get a little rattled at stuff. Also exposed to significant Neuro cases on a daily basis so perhaps jump to worst case situation.

OP posts:
Original poster
flowngo · 03/10/2023 07:57

NonMiDispiace · 03/10/2023 07:54

@winteriscoming2022 that’s what I think too, anything else is illogical.
@SuperCam quite frankly the reaction is so extreme isn’t it?

Surely the simplest thing to do is ask the boyfriend if he was discussing it with someone or talking to himself or if it is a recording (which is more likely than déja vu, epilepsy, brain tumour etc)?

Either you move on OP or call it a day, your level of anxiety is unsustainable. You clearly don’t trust him either way.

So of course I ask him, and he denies all knowledge of having said this. This gets me where exactly?

OP posts:
Original poster
flowngo · 03/10/2023 07:59

Temporaryname158 · 03/10/2023 07:55

There’s a lot going on here

you seem to have a history with the hospital, they have his number on file, you’ve sought help thre before and are very anxious in regard to your health - are you well OP? Have you been mentally and physically well historically?

then there’s your boyfriend. You claim he is an Angel however you term previous argument's as him ranting at you and he got angry about a silly thing, you not wanting to drink. That isn’t really cause for an argument. How many other argument's did you have? About what?

did you have any of these episodes prior to meeting him?

it feels strange you feel you have a medical problem with no basis for this, yet have a boyfriend who seems a little odd to me!

Local hospital for 25 yrs, there in summer with a resp issue, consultant rang him from my phone and then I added him to the system, he was picking me up from ED. Didn't request his immediate presence bedside or make a huge song and dance about it.

As stated above, no hx or dx of mental health issues.

OP posts:
BurnToastAgain · 03/10/2023 08:01

flowngo · 03/10/2023 07:56

The thing is I wasn't tired at 2030 so I don't know why I thought it would be a good idea to try and sleep then and await a phone call. Wouldn't normally do that.

I do have a family hx of brain tumours, bi-polar and my dad had a stroke at only 40 so I do get a little rattled at stuff. Also exposed to significant Neuro cases on a daily basis so perhaps jump to worst case situation.

So you went to bed for no reason? You weren’t tired and you were expecting a phone call. That’s odd behaviour.

You also use “medical” language abundantly throughout your posts. Are you a clerk in the NHS or similar perhaps and reading patient notes, along with your late mother’s illness and death (for which I am very sorry) has filled you with anxiety?

ChesterDrawz · 03/10/2023 08:02

Deja vu is almost the opposite of what you're talking about, OP.

Deja vu would be when you actually hear the conversation for the first time (reality) but are convinced you heard the exact same conversation previously (imagined).

Not when you know the conversation previously took place (reality) but think you are hearing it again (imagined).

They are very, very different scenarios and the second is most definitely not an example of deja vu or even similar.

Temporaryname158 · 03/10/2023 08:03

You answered my posted about your health but what about his behaviour?

MrTiddlesTheCat · 03/10/2023 08:03

You are being absolutely ridiculous. He pocket dialed you, you heard him ranting to himself about you, he's denying it as he's embarrassed, he's encouraging your ridiculous notion of some sudden neurological issue as it gets him off the hook. It really is that simply.

SuperCam · 03/10/2023 08:03

So you don’t have any diagnosed conditions yourself but your immediate thought was to contact a GP friend, chat to Neuro, go to the ED, contact your HCP circle, call your own GP today …

You say you work close to Neuro but is this in a medical or surgical capacity?

it feels like you see lots of things going on at work and are superimposing them as an explanation for something entirely unrelated that happened in your relationship, rather than trying to understand why your DP might have been ranting to himself about you.

Kissmas · 03/10/2023 08:04

You seem overly keen with being "calm" around him, not "making a huge song and dance" etc. Why is that?

4 months ago he's arguing with you because you won't drink with him and now he's been caught spewing his bile. Letting his tensions out, talking to the bottles he just had delivered. Your first thing was to think you're going mad and he's happy to let you think that.

This is the kind of bloke who will beat you black and blue one day and everyone will say, "but he was so laid back!"

Original poster
flowngo · 03/10/2023 08:06

ChesterDrawz · 03/10/2023 08:02

Deja vu is almost the opposite of what you're talking about, OP.

Deja vu would be when you actually hear the conversation for the first time (reality) but are convinced you heard the exact same conversation previously (imagined).

Not when you know the conversation previously took place (reality) but think you are hearing it again (imagined).

They are very, very different scenarios and the second is most definitely not an example of deja vu or even similar.

I thought it was where you had heard it or seen it for sure and then you had a repeated episode of it further down the line but in a less present sense?

OP posts:
BurnToastAgain · 03/10/2023 08:08

flowngo · 03/10/2023 08:06

I thought it was where you had heard it or seen it for sure and then you had a repeated episode of it further down the line but in a less present sense?

Show quote history

No, that’s not correct. Look it up OP.

Freshstarts23 · 03/10/2023 08:09

You’re not being entirely honest here OP.

I looked at your old posts which I wouldn’t normally take the time to do but I was so baffled.

You keep insisting you have no MH issues but that doesn’t seem to be the case as you have posted about being suicidal before. I don’t want to bring up unrelated personal things, but it seems 5 months ago when you met your BF you were in quite a vulnerable place.

There does also seem to be some concerns from professionals regarding your stability and MH.

I think you need to talk to someone, not a friend but your actual GP.

Hibiscrubbed · 03/10/2023 08:11

flowngo · 02/10/2023 21:40

It's exactly like something he would've said a good while ago, it was a whole 28 seconds of this narrative.

Mate, this isn’t Deja vu. That’s a peculiar sensation of having heard something exactly as before, not your slimy boyfriend gaslighting you over something you’ve previously argued about…

Hibiscrubbed · 03/10/2023 08:12

Ah. The OP possibly isn’t well.

greenhydrangea · 03/10/2023 08:14

greenhydrangea · 02/10/2023 23:30

Regardless of what you actually heard, or just thought you heard, this is not an instance of deja vu.

Déjà vu - Wikipedia

Show quote history

Posted this link hours ago.

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