Living as a woman

[MissScarletInTheBallroom]

This is a thread for people to give examples of experiences which constitute "living as a woman".

I'll go first.

Peeing on a pregnant test and waiting anxiously to see whether a second line appears.

Playing ‘is it Covid or is it perimenopause’ during 2020.

Seeing the cysts on your ovaries during an ultrasound.

Getting home from a large company Christmas dinner only to find that I had a large red stain on the back of my white skirt.

Getting my fallopian tubes removed.

Breastfeeding.

Getting my first period the day before I was due to start at a new school and not knowing where any of the toilets were.

Having a smear.

Getting paid less than a man for the same job. For decades.
Women have much lower pension pots, so “living as a woman” is so great it lasts throughout life.

Trying to work out if you should take preventative painkillers now to ward off potential stomach cramps, or wait until your stomach actually starts hurting.

Being told that it’s selfish to ask your husband to come into the hospital at the start of Labour, as it could take many hours and men need their sleep…

Being scared to use a tampon as a youngster

Having a hysteroscopy.

Having part of my cervix shaved off because of a dodgy smear 6 months after having my vagina stitched back together after giving birth.

Doing three-hour finals at university while flooding.

Being called 'dear' by shopkeepers.

oh god yes. Several tests taken thinking my peri flu symptoms were Covid ffs

Having a miscarriage in the toilets at work.

Having my uterus x-rayed after 5 miscarriages. Like the smear test from hell.

Having to have the coil put in even though I'm 54 and very unlikely to get pregnant naturally but you have to do it in order to get anti migraine pills(Topirimate). Said meds have a high risk of causing birth defects etc to unborn babies. They have been fab for reducing my migraines though.

Finding the right support for breastfeeding when it’s just not working. Spending a lot of time asking ppl and feeling like a total failure.

not leaving the house with your newborn for several weeks because you can only feed lying down. Till the tongue tie was cut.

Being told by my male boss that he and us wife had timed all their pregnancies to avoid the busy season at work, and that pregnancy wasn't an illness, you know.

Should have vommed on his shoes, in retrospect.

Having what felt like 14 people in the room whilst my legs are akimbo and someone is trying to stick something to my baby’s head so they can better monitor him during childbirth.

Having PMDD, horrifically heavy flooding periods for 7-10 days every 3 weeks.

Debilitating SPD when pregnant that I’ve never fully recovered from.

Feeling delirious with sleep deprivation, a raging fever, mastitis and a breast abscess. Being admitted to hospital and taking a two week old baby with you to keep up that constant feeding, even after your abscess has been lanced.

Copied and pasted from my post on a different thread:
was thinking about this today. What is a female experience? It's not about how we dress or look or make up although there are those elements possibly. It's about being told you can't do stuff because you are a girl, to be told you can't have ADHD (insert other conditions) because you are a girl, to have pain dismissed, to be told you are a drama queen or too much, or too pushy, to deal with the embarrassment of a period leaking, to be patronised. To not get a job because you are not pushy enough. To be groped in the tube, to have NO ignored. To be told you are crazy when you question a man's behaviour. To be told to make sure you have your keys in your hand when you walk home at night, to have men call you a "fat c*nt" because you dare to call them out on their behaviour. Domestic, emotional and physical abuse. The list goes on and on.

I'm sorry but living as a woman by wearing dresses and make up for any amount of years is not living the female experience.

And adding the Biggie for me - going through treatment for cervical cancer, campaigning for the HPV vaccine to have the charity I worked do hard for to start talking about people with cervixes. Not women