Have mumsnet hq seen this?

[PutYourShirtOnMartin]

😳😳😳

Pops head out of shelter

Did we survive?
Can we have a headcount?

The potential porn apocalypse doesn't seem to have occurred so far. The night of the long... erm... (knives?) is over.

I think there have been some casualties. I googled, I won't have been the only one.

Over on The Archers threads I am known as MysticBore™️ because of my mysterious gifts and my trusty 🔮.

I can now confess that I drew a giant pentacle around Mumsnet to keep us safe overnight.

We shall fight them on the beaches
We shall fight them with our witches
We shall fight them with our scarves and tight-laced stays
We shall fight them with our viperish womanly ways
With our Zoflora, smelling salts, loo brushes and reticules
And our most powerful weapon of all - Ridicule!

WE SHALL NEVER SURRENDER!!!

Bore that is brilliant👏

And if that fails Bore, flood them with porn.

The potential porn apocalypse doesn't seem to have occurred so far. The night of the long... erm... (knives?) is over.

Perhaps it came too soon and you missed it?

Did you blink at any point?

I googled too. . Now looking forward to being able to drop it into conversation and shock the offspring 😉

I say Bore that was a rather spiffing rhyme. Top hole old girl!

Sal Volatile always sounds like it should have been the name of a character from the Sopranos.

So disappointed in the lack of porn. These TRAs, always over promising and under delivering. I was looking forward to some #girldick

I got a shock first time I heard it pronounced.😳

Is there a Hentai forum we could flood with Archers discussion? I do like symmetry

I am so up for this. I stopped listening because of the Helen Archer coercive control storyline, but I'll totally come back for that. keep me posted!

Don't joke, Sexnotgender. I looked into all this shit for a couple of days a few years ago and it's grim. The whole point of cissyfication or forced feminisation porn is how violating and humiliating it is for a man to be forced to transform himself into a woman, portrayed as a pornified cumslut (not my word). The written fantasies were even worse. I would steer very clear of anyone who was aroused by it. It was repellent. < not envy.

We released the vipers into the grounds at 11pm. Looks like they saw any troublemakers off... That and BOW's pentangle.

I'm consumed with the need to know what the set up is at MNHQ. Is it all very techy and efficient like mission control and is there a countdown prior to the ban button being pressed or is there a lone MNHQ villain with a white cat, hidden down in the basement, enjoying their job as ban button pusher whilst manically laughing.

And TurboTeddy: Very much more like your second imagining there...

I have to say: MNHQ excels on the modding with humour front. 👌 Hebe

Was completely serious about the cat hair @boatyardblues, but thank you! The cat hair struggle is real. (I actually think Justine only gave me the job because I already had the white cat. Made good business sense, I guess...)

Oh have I missed all the fun?
I put my liberty bodice on especially.

We released the vipers into the grounds at 11pm.

I know I whinge sometimes, but MNHQ you can be so cool

Cheers women. My pearls are on standby.

Would MN mods allow me to operate their ban button for a day...even an hour.

So cool to be guest ban button operater. Not quite like the nuclear button, but it would do, since I am not Trump.

It's not actually a button. It's a pull chain.

Do banned posters drop through the floor into a shark-filled tank, Hebe? If not, that sounds a bit underwhelming TBH. I’d much prefer a big button with a choice of sounds like QI panellists get.

Not a shark tank. Bad tempered tuna.

Neither. We give a sharp yank on the chain, a toilet flush sounds, and a hatch opens beneath their feet, which drops them into a chute and slides them straight into Netmums.

(Just kidding. They get slid into the MNHQ basement where they live out their days repeatedly having to ask Gordon Brown which biscuit is his favourite, and all with only one roast chicken to survive on for the rest of eternity).

Oh, bravo, Hebe. Well played.