@FatsiaJaponicaInTheGarden thank you for your thoughtful reply.
Maybe I’m odd, but I don’t find the statistics discouraging. I find them empowering and affirming - for three separate but overlapping reasons.
For one thing, they show me just how much I have already overcome - because I got so far with beating my food addiction and changing my mindset around food BEFORE WLI. I was already successfully keeping off a huge amount of weight because of the hard work I had put in on mindset, emotional regulation, addiction etc. I have done the repeat dieting; weigh cycling many, many times. This time was already different - nearly 3 years in and while I have had several wobbles, there has been nothing like the major rapid regain I used to know and hate.
Secondly, the Overeaters Anonymous view of “an allergy of the body plus an obsession of the mind” makes so much sense to me, and I was able to actually experience the physical part by going low carb, and even more so by deciding to go sugar-free. It took me multiple attempts before I could make it stick, and then I noticed that I was shifting my consumption to salty snacks instead. But when I go even a few days without those things, the cravings fade away. There is - for ME - a list of foods which I can not eat in moderation. If I abstain from them completely, life is so much easier. And that’s not my fault - it’s just something my body does, not something I chose.
And thirdly - all that the WLI research is teaching about appetite control - which is similarly different from person to person, and NOT MY FAULT. I was always hungrier than everyone else, from the year dot. That’s not a choice or a moral characteristic, it’s biology.
Now, to be clear - that dysregulation of appetite is exacerbated by poor choice of foodstuffs. I’m convinced that if I had eaten only natural whole foods from birth, I would never have got to the size I did. I would still probably have been bigger than average, maybe somewhat overweight.
It’s the intersection of my genetic vulnerability to appetite dysregulation, and to certain addictive foods, with the food supply I was exposed to growing up (and continue to be surrounded by today), with a side order of using food for emotional release, diet culture, low self-esteem etc which did for me.
MJ does a lot for the appetite dysregulation and cravings part. It does nothing for the emotional part, I have to continue to work on that myself. And, now that I recognise my addictive foods, I have to make the choice to abstain from them. Of course I still like to think that one day I will be able to have them in moderation - because, you know, they’re tasty, and I like them. Just at the moment I have no wish to do that experiment. Maybe one day I will. And if it backfires, then I’ll know. If I have to stay sugar-free for ever and a day, that’s cool - because what I have gained is so, so much more than I have given up.
I still like to think that I will be able to get off MJ eventually and keep the weight off and the quality of life I’ve acquired. But if it turns out I can’t, so be it. I am in the fortunate position of being able to afford to pay. So if I need to, I will.