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Deep empathy for flight attendants - giving gifts to balance things out?

193 replies

gentlegee1976 · 10/09/2026 06:11

Hi everyone,
I want to show some appreciation to the flight attendants on an upcoming trip. This is country number 11 that I am going to visit, and over my travels, I've developed a deep personal empathy for public service workers.

I have prepared four £10 Starbucks gift vouchers (one for each crew member on a short-haul flight) to hand over.

This will be done from BHX whenever my finances allow me to. Along with the gift cards, I’ve written a note to explain why I'm doing this. This is the exact text of the note:

"Hi, please accept these Starbucks gift vouchers as a small gesture of my appreciation. There's one for each of you (4 in total).
I spent 10 years as a Birmingham bus driver, during which time I was spat at, punched in the face and headbutted, not to mention the endless disrespect and abuse that public service workers have to endure.
Although (as you already know) the overwhelming majority of people are polite and respectful, it's the small minority that can really ruin your day.
I'm just trying to balance things out a bit and maybe brighten your shift up a little. I truly understand the problems that you face, and the fact that they're only getting worse.
Unfortunately, 12-hour+ workdays are all too familiar to me as well. Please buy yourselves a nice breakfast, you deserve it. I appreciate your hard work, and recognise that you do a difficult and demanding job."

My question for the board is: will this small gesture do to try and balance out the endless problems that they have to deal with?

Has anyone done something similar, or do we have any cabin crew on here who can advise? They'll be given to the first attendant I see in an envelope (discreetly) when first boarding. They'll understand when they open it.
Thanks in advance.

OP posts:
Bumbelinaaa · 10/09/2026 12:51

You sound overly intense. Having worked in “public service” I would actively avoid you after this because I’d be concerned you could become a stalker.

This kind of intense/uncomfortable interaction, especially if I was already busy/stressed with work, wouldn’t be worth a £10 Starbucks voucher

cloudbabies · 10/09/2026 13:01

Sorry op but I have to agree it’s all too much. Whilst it’s a kind gesture you might just get talked about afterwards… in like, how weird was that woman ?! My cousin is ex cabin crew and she did it to see the world and get glammed up lol some people love it

Mrcollinswave · 10/09/2026 13:44

emuloc · 10/09/2026 08:40

I remember, years ago, when using the local bus, a Woman, who was a regular, used to give the bus driver a small package that she had made up. I could make out that it contained a couple of chocolates, a mars bar, kit kat type. I thought that it was a nice thing to do, although it is something that would not cross my mind to do it myself.

Awww that's such a lovely gesture! No I would never have thought of this before now!

Phloosie · 10/09/2026 14:02

The problem with using ai to write a personal note is that it throws the vibe is completely off. It’s a sweet sentiment but it needs wording by a human, or you come off sounding slightly deranged

Sweetpea333 · 10/09/2026 14:11

Batshit creepy and weird. You need a hobby.

menopausequeen · 10/09/2026 14:13

It is a nice thought but could be misinterpreted

Sweetpea333 · 10/09/2026 14:14

And I'm just home after visiting my 106th country. You aren't the global nomad you seem to think you are!

Agatha1989 · 10/09/2026 14:15

MyCatIsAnAeroplane · 10/09/2026 12:10

This definitely seems more about you than them. Smacks of giving a coffee to a rough sleeper and filming it for likes.

My thoughts exactly

TankFlyBoss · 10/09/2026 14:28

Sorry this is really weird.

AquamarinePearlGold · 10/09/2026 14:34

So weird.

Dufry · 10/09/2026 14:48

I’m currently sitting on a flight somewhere over the Baltic. Cabin crew are perfectly lovely but, beyond giving me my pretzels and drink, haven’t really been run off their feet.

The best thing anyone can do for those working on a flight is to sit down quietly, keep your seatbelt fastened when the light is on, move into your row when stowing baggage, and just generally not be a dick. If everyone did that, life would be much easier for all flight staff and passengers.

Jerrybalanitis · 10/09/2026 15:42

I am cringing.

LBFseBrom · 10/09/2026 21:05

It dies seem a bit - inappropriate. Nobody has to become a flight attendant, thy choose to do it and have training. Like any job there are good days and not so good but generally, people who do that enjoy it.

If you particularly appreciate some cabin staff, eg if they go the extra mile, just write a letter to the company and commend them. They don't need food and drink vouchers, they usually have a food allowance.

HalzTangz · 10/09/2026 21:10

I've been on numerous planes, long haul and short haul and have never seen the steward/ess's being treated badly by anyone. I have however seen the public loose their temper on the ground staff, surely that's where your gift cards should go

faithfultoGeorgeMichael · 10/09/2026 22:48

I know my SIL dos this to try and get better treatment, Disney people do it too. Its pretty adorable tbh

Lemonfrost · 10/09/2026 22:53

This thread is 100% comedy gold! It’s so good I have read it twice and am still laughing 😂

SandrenaIsMyBloodType · 10/09/2026 23:14

I think it’s weird, creepy and inappropriate.

Jerrybalanitis · 12/09/2026 06:51

They will probably give the cards away to the hotel staff in the 5 star hotel they are staying in on the next layover, but at least they will have a good laugh out of it. If the OP is seeking self congratulation this much, why not volunteer with actual needy people or animals? This is batshit and should be in classics.

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