I am starting to feel it is bordering on a munchausens by proxy situation where these poor children are infected by their idiotic parents delusions about security and they will live in a state of fear.
I had a friend whose mum had then undiagnosed schizophrenia. She really believed her mum’s paranoia was the truth until eventually a total collapse took her mum to hospital and other family intervened.
It affected her dreadfully and even as an adult when she could appreciate her mum had been ill she could never quite forgive her for the ruination of her childhood.
I think H’s chronic drug use, his limited intellectual ability, his sense of entitlement and resentment have combined to such a degree that he has no grasp on reality.
M on the other hand just exploits whatever suits her purpose.
The children are both pawns and collateral damage in their parent’s circus.
The effects of this instability will be with them both for life. Hugely sad to watch this play out.