Never Gonna Kyiv You Up: Grand Final Eurovision 2017

[SuffolkNWhat]

Welcome one and all to the Grand Final thread!

Put up a chair, grab your blue cocktail and join us for an evening of dancing gorillas and loads of red and white outfits.

The running order of the Grand Final of the 2017 Eurovision Song Contest:

1. Israel: Eye Candy
2. Poland: First Aid Kit Dress
3. Belarus: Boat Wind Machine and Sticky Back Plastic Guitar
4. Austria: Lee Ryan in Dreamworks
5. Armenia: Hyundai Bollywood Dancers
6. The Netherlands: Talent Contest Rejects
7. Moldova: Epic Sax Guy Solo
8. Hungary: Sgt Pepper's Rapping Gypsies
9. Italy: Dancing Gorilla

10. Denmark: "Danish" Traitor with a Massive Gin and Red Dress 11. Portugal: Singing Werewolf in his Dad's Suit 12. Azerbaijan: Goth, Ladders and scary Horseman 13. Croatia: Go Compare Pavarotti Man 14. Australia: Bush don't come cheap, buy him some socks 15. Greece: Wet Underwear in a Paddling Pool 16. Spain 17. Norway: Darth Punk 18. United Kingdom: Whole Lotta Gold 19. Cyprus: Fair Isle Sequins and Gravity 20. Romania: Yodelling Taylor Swift and Her Massive Glittery Cannons 21. Germany: They really don't want to win 22. Ukraine 23. Belgium: All Alone in the Rabbit Headlight Zone 24. Sweden: TopMan ad. Too Frikkin Beautiful to be Dr Evil 25. Bulgaria: Bieber Untouchable Child 26. France: it'll be in French.

A huge thanks to RedToothBrush for the summaries on the last thread and GinSwigmore for the thread title.

Singer looks a little like Draco Mallory

Or Malfoy even

MrsB do it!

1st prize for entertainment

Oh Moldova are my fav so far - this is what it's all about!

My daughter won't stop talking so I've git half an eye on it.

We're the dresses short a minute ago or am I going mad?

I'd go for a drink with them but not vote for them

Dad dancing!

Just caught up,with this thread. Thought Nathen from Austria had a nice voice. The Netherlands song was much better then their outfits. my dh quite liked Moldova.

I didn't realise they're meant to b brides that make even less sense - I'm missing my wine

Most entertaining so far

Haha I was just about to say the same thing! Didn't know Malfoy liked muggle music.

It's shit, but I like it.

I liked that.

What was the costume change?

I like this one.

I'm currently trying to explain to my half kiwi daughter why New Zealand are not in Eurovision, whilst wondering how I'll explain Australia!

It's been broadcast here for like 40 years and around 4 million people get up to watch it every year.

Plus we're an associate member of the EBU, which is why we were invited in the first place. Now I think they just appreciate the extra viewership and money haha.

A man bun.

I don't normally drink til 9pm...struggling...

Hungary has a manbun.

and a milk churn.

I seriously believe that something awful posseses people once they get together to plan their Eurovision song. Something crazy and altogether ridiculous.

Moldova - definitely still my favourite!

The dresses were short and then they released the hem and dropped to make them long.

Oh god, nice threads!

So far it's all been a bit meh.

The dance version of the UK song is bloody good.