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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

Child has been missing since 9pm - frantic !

449 replies

MrsLighthouse · 08/05/2025 04:03

I don’t even know if anyone is awake to read this but my neurodivergent 13 yr old son left the house quietly at 9pm and hasn’t come home . I caught him out about something pretty awful he had done, and he denied it and left rather than deal with it / talk about it , he left.

We live in central London and he’s gone without keys , phone or money . After 2 hours driving around looking for him, l reported to the police and they have him now listed as a vulnerable missing person but l’m going out of my mind .

Has any other parent experienced this ? My head is going to a thousand awful scenarios …it’s 4 am now and so cold .

OP posts:
Definitelynotme2022 · 08/05/2025 11:19

I'm so relieved for you.

My 13yr old ds was missing for a few hours over the weekend, and walked in the door at 1am just as I was calling the police. It's very, very frightening.

Namechanger2578 · 08/05/2025 11:20

@MrsLighthouse

So pleased there's been a happy outcome and he's back home. Just be aware you may experience delayed shock/panic over the next few days, now he's been found, and your body can relax. All the 'what if's might pop into your head at random moments. It's completely normal, and will pass.

myheadsjustmush · 08/05/2025 11:20

That is fantastic news! Big hugs to you all. X

Cakebird · 08/05/2025 11:20

So glad to read your update, OP 💐

KhakiOrca · 08/05/2025 11:21

Oh what a huge relief! So pleased for you.

GoodStuffAnnie · 08/05/2025 11:22

Lovely update. Bless you all. Xx

NotDarkGothicMama · 08/05/2025 11:22

I'm so happy he's safely home OP. A good sleep due all round!

Dearg · 08/05/2025 11:23

Thank you for taking the time to update Op.

So very glad he’s home with you now.

myplace · 08/05/2025 11:24

A shower, a snack and a rest are probably order of the day. Give him some time to recover physically before you have a chat. He needs to know several things-
how unsafe he was,
how scared you were,
what he should do next time he wants to run.

That last bit is really important @MrsLighthouse Is there a safe place he could be allowed to run away to? A family member or friend who will let you know he’s safe? He’ll get the release of running away without actually being unsafe or lost.

ItGhoul · 08/05/2025 11:25

MrsLighthouse · 08/05/2025 11:05

He’s home ! I spotted him near where we live and scooped him up ! He is grubby and silent and his face is red and rashy but he says he slept on a bench in a park so that probably explains it . Thank god …and thank you to every single person who took the time to support me through last night and today . I was worried about posting ( as sometimes threads can go toxic very quickly ) but it’s been such a kind helpful experience . You are all amazing ! Obviously there’s a lot to unpick around the circumstances and the police have just left after a “person found” interview …they were very gentle - l need now to speak to social services and the school safeguarding team……but ….he’s home . Thank you again for all the love .. and here’s to all of us who love ( and struggle ) through family life . Just for today - it’s ended ok xxx ❤️

Fantastic news. You must be so, so relieved. Sounds like the police were great too.

Tavimama · 08/05/2025 11:26

I'm so, so glad to hear this. Gentle hugs all round. 💐

BitOutOfPractice · 08/05/2025 11:26

Oh I am so happy he’s home. I hope you can get some rest today op. You must be shattered.

ThrowAway987654321 · 08/05/2025 11:28

Oh thank god op, I’ve been thinking about you all morning xx

PickledMuffin · 08/05/2025 11:29

Amazing news that he’s home! x

lifeonmars100 · 08/05/2025 11:30

Wonderful news x

Jollyjoy · 08/05/2025 11:30

Oh so happy for you to see that he is ok, cuddle him tight!

YonderTweek · 08/05/2025 11:31

Ah I'm so glad you found him! That must have been so stressful. Wishing you guys all the best. 💐

OurManyEnds · 08/05/2025 11:38

Oh, thank goodness

sparkleghost · 08/05/2025 11:41

Thank goodness 💕

IHateRain76 · 08/05/2025 11:42

So pleased for you @MrsLighthouse I was one of the 5am ish posters. He came back, and that it what you need to remember. No matter what else is going on, you are his safe place. Good job, Mrs LH. So pleased for you an unmumsnetty hug.

johnworf · 08/05/2025 11:43

MrsLighthouse · 08/05/2025 11:05

He’s home ! I spotted him near where we live and scooped him up ! He is grubby and silent and his face is red and rashy but he says he slept on a bench in a park so that probably explains it . Thank god …and thank you to every single person who took the time to support me through last night and today . I was worried about posting ( as sometimes threads can go toxic very quickly ) but it’s been such a kind helpful experience . You are all amazing ! Obviously there’s a lot to unpick around the circumstances and the police have just left after a “person found” interview …they were very gentle - l need now to speak to social services and the school safeguarding team……but ….he’s home . Thank you again for all the love .. and here’s to all of us who love ( and struggle ) through family life . Just for today - it’s ended ok xxx ❤️

Thank goodness you have found him and that he came to no harm. How worrying for you though.

We have been through something very similar but ours wanted to cause himself harm. Thankfully he was found before anything happened.

We have now changed our door locks so that you need a key to open them from the inside (and out, obviously). Keys are hidden in a safe place that our son doesn't know about.

GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 08/05/2025 11:43

Massive phew! So glad he’s back safe. x

Lindy2 · 08/05/2025 11:45

So glad he's back home safely.

Original poster
MrsLighthouse · 08/05/2025 11:46

johnworf · 08/05/2025 11:43

Thank goodness you have found him and that he came to no harm. How worrying for you though.

We have been through something very similar but ours wanted to cause himself harm. Thankfully he was found before anything happened.

We have now changed our door locks so that you need a key to open them from the inside (and out, obviously). Keys are hidden in a safe place that our son doesn't know about.

Show quote history

It’s so hard isn’t it ? Wishing your family all the best ❤️

OP posts:
Original poster
MrsLighthouse · 08/05/2025 11:47

IHateRain76 · 08/05/2025 11:42

So pleased for you @MrsLighthouse I was one of the 5am ish posters. He came back, and that it what you need to remember. No matter what else is going on, you are his safe place. Good job, Mrs LH. So pleased for you an unmumsnetty hug.

Thanks so much …and for being kind enough to post at such an ungodly hour ! So helpful ..and kind 💕

OP posts: