Hair is an ageist issue

[Beeinalily]

In this area there are two looks for ladies over about 50. Either long unstyled hair, or a graduated bob. The reason being, whatever you ask for, you get the bob. Last time I went, I did my research and downloaded a photo of what I wanted, booked the salon owner (rather expensively), and came out with - the bob. And actually the bob in question wasn't as good as the usual one from the trainee! So now I have the long unstyled (and unkempt) look, and it's driving me crazy. The dreaded bob is probably better, but all the older ladies here look like clones! Does anyone else find this?

What style did you want?

Oh my God @Beeinalily !! I'm hearing you loud and clear

I'm 60 and yes - I would like a layered style that isn't ultra short but also isn't a bob. However, as you say, I come out with a bob. And I'm sick of it.

Something like this, @TheSilkWorm

Plus - yes - there's a lot of 'us' in this area

No not at all
I have a short pixie .. I'm 58

I've generally always had what I've asked for - unless it was unachievable ?
In which case I'd expect them to say No - your hairs too thick / too short / too wavy

It's actually quite creepy when you see us all together, like the Children of the Damned!

If you have long unstyled hair, you could treat yourself to a variety of bands, clips and grips and put your hair up or plait it around your crown. Perhaps go to a long hair specialist and book a styling session.

I have very thick hair so pinning it up is hard work and really only for nights out.

Instead I chose a very sharp bob, longer at the front, shorter towards the back, and clipped at the back of my neck. It follows the line of my jaw but is a little longer. I concentrate on keeping it very glossy and sharp.

But choose a style that suits you. Perhaps look at older styling sites or books that have different ideas.

She did you a favour giving you a bob if that pic is what you asked for

I used to have a hairdresser like that. Two damn years of telling him what I wanted and getting his trademark cut. Sigh.

I have a fantastic hairdresser but my hair is frizzy now. Even if I straighten it in the morning it looks a mess by the time I get to work. Is the Dyson hair dryer/straightener the holy grail of hair products? Just asking for a friend 😊

No Not where I am - most usual style is as described by Meadowfinch 'Instead I chose a very sharp bob, longer at the front, shorter towards the back, and clipped at the back of my neck. It follows the line of my jaw but is a little longer. I concentrate on keeping it very glossy and sharp.'

Or a bit helen mirren ish

Shouldn't laugh but I did 😂

Blimey, that was bitchy!

I tend to agree...

I don’t think the OP asked for your opinion. I assume you don’t like that haircut because it’s on an older woman; if it was on someone young it would be fine 🙄.

Whether you like the cut is neither here nor there, if I'm paying for a service I should get what I asked for. If you asked for a cheese and pickle sandwich and the cashier disapproved and gave you egg mayonnaise instead would that be okay?

I don’t see why long hair has to equal unkempt and unstyled though? Surely you can make long hair look nice?

The style you linked and a bob are so different! Did you not say ‘No you need to carry on’ when she stopped cutting at bob length?
I have the bob. It’s just my hair but not too long and untidy. 🤷‍♀️ Highlighted of course. I am a Surrey cliche.

Why does everyone go to the same hairdresser?! Can't you go somewhere else?

My hair is very thick and wavy, and tangles easily. It's really best short.

Sorry - it’s not. It’s the same work as blow drying with a round brush if you have frizzy hair.
source: your frizzy haired fellow MN-er

@CheeseTime I thought it would look different after I'd washed it - stupid of me. @MrsSchnickelfritz I've been to several places with more or less the same thing. It just seems to be what's given in most places.

That's bonkers! I don't recognise it all where I live and it's hardly some sort of bustling metropolis either.
Next time you see someone with hair you like ask them where they had it done. Or trawl Facebook for salons and see if they have any pictures of haircuts you actually like.
I do think less people have short hair these days and some hairdressers are pretty nervous about cutting it short. I have short hair and I've found a good hairdresser but it did take a while

I go for the below shoulder look that is literally everywhere here. We are like a tribe and even use the same hairdresser. Just don’t have an opinion; she gives everyone a variant of the same and in fairness is good at it.

I would go elsewhere as some hairdressers have fixed views!