Hair is an ageist issue

[Beeinalily]

In this area there are two looks for ladies over about 50. Either long unstyled hair, or a graduated bob. The reason being, whatever you ask for, you get the bob. Last time I went, I did my research and downloaded a photo of what I wanted, booked the salon owner (rather expensively), and came out with - the bob. And actually the bob in question wasn't as good as the usual one from the trainee! So now I have the long unstyled (and unkempt) look, and it's driving me crazy. The dreaded bob is probably better, but all the older ladies here look like clones! Does anyone else find this?

Not weird -do it!

You don't happen to live in South Wales, do you? Your hairdresser sounds exactly like mine!

Absolutely not and I would be chuffed if someone stopped me to ask that.

So not everyone does have the bob then?!

Wow, where I live, this is most definitely not the case. There is quite a wide variety of hairstyle in women over 50: long hair, short hair and medium length bobs. What I would say is that more women than pre pandemic are leaving their natural grey or white, rather than dyeing/ highlighting it regularly, (though many still do).
I've always found that hairdressers do what I ask, though they may make small suggestions around my main idea
I live in a village in the north of England, but close to a larger town where there are a lot of salons.

If you compliment someone on their haircut and ask them would they mind telling you where they have it done that's not weird. It's human interaction.

@nancy75 i lol'd
@Beeinalily ...that defo neither straggle nor bob...so once held mirror for view of nothing like asked for at back either...then what??do you just buckle,cot,bag,pay n off go?
Why?
or even why dont you go-...oh no marjory-mildred.No!s, NOT wavy off face flatter cut .
Egg is NOT even close to cheese pickle. fix it or fk off,unpaid cos need go find a better salon.
of all the unsatisfied purchses available -make the noise bout hair

Translation?

No!

You are correct.

Maybe try a different hairdresser, I'm in my 50's (with long hair) and my hairdresser is superb.

It's taken me many years to find one I get on with though. He understands my hair (curly/wavy/textured) and does what I ask BUT also knows what's actually possible with my particular hair.

Plus, he gives great chair. It's always a treat going to that salon. It's just fun.

Think its the way they are trained nowadays - ie in modules and it they don’t fancy it, they chose not to do some (eg short hair! Or clipper work). In the olden days 🤣 they had an apprenticeship that covered every aspect and they had to pass all of it to work their way up the stylist ranks. I did watch my stylist do a gorgeous, graduated cut with clipper work on an older lady with beautiful silver grey hair just before she did mine this week, so feel confident that she really does get hair! But I think she and the chap who is coming to do my kids hair later (son growing our thick curly hair so doesn’t want a ‘traditional mens’ cut either) are rare diamonds!

I have struggled with this exact problem all my life, it never mattered what I asked for, I always got a bob, sometimes a very short layered bob, but not what I asked for. I periodically gave up, and grew my hair long, trimming it myself when necessary, then getting fed up of it after a couple of years and trying again with the hairdressers. Last year I went to a local salon, a sole trader hairdresser, and what a miracle, I came out with what I asked for. She gave me what all the posh expensive salons had not, and at the age of 73 at last I can get the hair cut I want, and for less than £25. I just hope this hairdressers career outlives me!

@queenMab99 I'm glad you found a good one at last! Mind you it can always be worse - when I was very young I asked for a "Purdy" - remember that? - and came out with the biggest backcombed, lacquered mess you can imagine 😔

😮

So are many bobs.🤷‍♀️

I've got quite long hair, last cut the (new) stylist did it far shorter than I'd asked and blow dried it into a sort of long bob. Which didn't suit me at all, and I CBA to blow dry it so it was curl in out rather than in most of the time till it grew longer again. Urgh.

I'm nearly 70, I'd rather look old fashioned than like a trendy old wannabe. And I need my hair off my face because of eczema.

I’ve got long unkempt hair - because I’m too tight to pay £££s for color and cut . I didn’t know it was a thing! Can someone pleeeese post a picture of what it’s stupposed to look like? Maybe I’m not as stuffy as I thought.

Scruffy!

The hairstyle you want is reminiscent of June Whitfield in the 'Terry and June' days. I would use your bus pass to travel to a small town with a hairdresser of an older vintage. My sister's MIL was still cutting hair when she was in her 70s in her small town salon in the north of England & could definately have given you a June Whitfieldesque style.

I went to Hampton Court Flower show every year a few years back, and it was a SEA of grey bobs!

Mind you- I'm over 50 now, and still have natural coloured hair, bit am contemplating a dreaded bob!

Accurate though.

In my case, it means it looks stunningly sleek and sexy like the old Rachel cut of the 90’s if the stylist gives me a full cut and blow-dry (took 90mins this week) OR, as is usual because I really CBA to put that much effort in or to buy a dyson airwrap, then I look like Hagrid.

The comments about the cut being old fashioned sum up the problem! A stylist can't face being termed old fashioned nowadays, everybody has to have the same eyebrows, lips, hair etc. , which is why folk all look identical.

What happened to having what actually suits you? It's far more flattering and not everyone suits a bob. I think it's shocking that a hairdresser can opt out of learning to cut hair short, if they aren't working in a large salon with various stylists then it's a necessary skill.

It isn't the case where I live. My hairdresser is fabulous and I've been going to her for 26 years. Since dd was born and I couldn't make it up to my hairdresser in the West End any more.

It's a bit scarey typing that to realise I've only had two hairdressers since 1980.

DD goes to the hairdresser in the village. She has a chin length Bob and occasional highlights and they don't cut well - dd can get away with it because she has good hair. They aren't much cheaper than mine in SW London. I suspect there is a local cut and not much variation.

This style is really ageing though.

@Yutoliketoto So what. The OP is nearly 70.

I'm 60 and some days I look it - whatever.