Expectations vs Reality?

[KatharinaRosalie]

Can we have another expectations vs reality thread?
Went to hairdresser. I asked for a Claire Dunphy messy cut: https://www.hairstyles.my.id/2018/04/julie-bowen-hairstyles-modern-family.html

Just walked past a mirror and though oooh I really do look like someone famous.
Yes, yes indeed. : https://www.udiscovermusic.com/artist/rod-stewart/

What I wanted .. Vs What I received.

I was really shy at the time and didn’t want to complain.. I was a bridesmaid for my best friend the next day😂

I mostly look like a bag lady but decided to buy some new horse riding gear that wasn't a covered in mud.

Expectation: Jilly Cooper heroine

Reality: Thewell character

Dying at these- they’re brilliant!! The Gondola comment 🤣

And I remembered another one!
found a cobalt blue beret in a charity shop
Expectation- vaguely mysterious Parisian ingenue

Reality- as I approached my grinning friends one of them said “ooh Betty” in a brilliant Frank Spencer take off

I once came downstairs dressed for work in a black polo neck and black trousers. I was aiming for gamine insouciance, a bit Audrey Hepburn.

DH asked if I was off out to deliver some Milk Tray. Bastard.

Ahh the time when I bought a Mac from a charity shop, it was all vintagy and cool and I felt like Kate Moss in the 90s with some lovely dangly earrings

I passed the mirror and was somewhat horrified to see Pat Butcher starring back at me

How I'd like to look in a wool hat, cosy, little bit 'quirky' and cute like SMG... reality, like one of the Flumps!

I ordered a gorgeous ecru linen jacket for the summer, here's me wearing it. I had to send it back

😆

Basil brush, Richard 3 and a 'squashed tomato wrapped in a curtain' got me crying with laughter.

Aww to see the flumps though.

Me in statement glasses:

I once bought a black biker style leather jacket to wear with docs and black skinny jeans.

Expectation: Debbie Harry/Chrissie Hynde stylish rock chick

Reality: Fat gimp

Snooks I just went to get new glasses. Thought that I'm old and don't really give a damn, why not go for something more fun - just a touch of colour, couple of rhinestones maybe instead of my standard plain plastic..
Looked in the mirror. Oh hi, Elton!

😂

Exactly! A cross between Elton John and Su Pollard from Hi De Hi!
I tried some silver wire rimmed Aviator style instead…. Well hello Jeffrey Dahmer! (Female version 😫)

I like these Joules Coast jackets in mustard yellow or pink or green or even baby blue, red or navy..
These look so cool on the models browsing the countryside, or a seaside.
Reality: I had it in every colour, even the cool khaki (and I usually look good in khaki)
and look like a 88 year old lady waiting at the bus stop.

Those coats!! They are a LIE.

My DH sent me this nice collage he made when I wore it on holiday.

@Mushroo yes, I’m so disappointed with them. I thought originally it is the colour, I thought if I get pink or green it might improved. Nope.

They clearly only work on 20 something, 5 ft 11 models, who I suspect wouldn’t be seen dead in them.

Always be suspicious of coats that are designed to be worn done up, but that aren't shown done up in marketing pictures. It means the stylist couldn't even make a 24 year old model look good in them.

Ah yes. I ordered a blouse with ruffles at the shoulder and a tie neck. Not cheap and a beautiful colour.

Aim: effortlessly charming woman “of a certain age”.
Reality: frilled lizard.

I bought the red one last year (on sale so I was doubly happy). DS said it was like one his mum has (she’s 87 and not any way fashionable).

Body suits (or just 'bodies' as we called them in the 80s), the ones that fasten with poppers at the crotch.
Expectation : smooth lines from shoulders to bum, get the tucked in look without the inevitable lines across the hips, show off my waist.
Reality: walk with a pronounced stoop as they're never long enough, poppers ping open or worst of all, trap your pubic hair in the fastening.
I shuddered when I saw they were back in the shops.

Literally crying right now 🤣

This is pretty much what I was coming on to say!!

I love the idea of soft floaty dresses/skirts/shirts and I SHOULD be able to carry it off because I'm 5'6" and a size 8.....

But I always look bloody bulky!!!! How is that even possible??!!!