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Please help! Warm weather (city break) dressing with a voluminous perimenopausal middle.

184 replies

LabraDabraDoo · 21/03/2022 09:58

I'm 44, and have in the past couple of years developed a perimenopausal middle, which now leaves me at the larger end of size 12, at least around the middle. The rest of me is in pretty good shape, but the clothes that worked for my last city break (2019, those were the days!) look terrible. In fitted Breton T-shirts or vest tops, I'm just all middle and feel so self conscious.

We are off to Sorrento for a few days soon, and will be doing lots of walking and active visits. Dresses with a waist work well, and I've packed a couple for sunny days. I have two pairs of cropped jeans which look nice, but what can I wear on top to flatter my middle? All the shops seems to have fitted or tucked in tops, which look lovely, but aren't an option. I guess I'll also need to be able to layer whatever I choose, as it can get chilly in the evenings.

Any ideas of styles/ shops I can try would be really helpful as I'm at a bit of a loss and really want to feel like I can look nice again!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
21
tulips27 · 25/03/2022 16:11

I can't read the whole thread but I can tell you avoid anything with front central pleats, it inevitably emphasises any tummy by sending the fabric flaring out at that point. Also there's no need for baggy tents or big, floaty tops, you're a 12 which is still slim in my book.

Bickles · 25/03/2022 16:17

Personally, with 34G boobs I have to avoid anything that hangs straight down off my boobs or I look enormous! I need to go out and in. Hence lots of elastic waist tops.

JanisMoplin · 25/03/2022 16:23

We are all shaped so differently in menopause. I am a size 12 and still a 34 B but with a masssive tummy and chubby arms. But yes big tents make me look even larger.

Bickles · 25/03/2022 16:33

I’m perimenopause at 44. I have always been a size 14 apple with big boobs and yummy and flat bum, slim legs. Now I’m pretty much the same but going towards a 16.
I’m not quite sure why people keep popping up and telling us to diet and exercise when it’s quite clearly a clothing thread.
Weight loss is that way >>>

ihatethecold · 25/03/2022 21:19

I’m going away next week to a hot country so I’ve bought beach cover ups/dresses
I’ve also discovered the big bloomer website that does very thin shorts that stop my thighs from rubbing in the heat.
The shorts are so comfortable.

They are specifically designed to prevent the dreaded chub rub.
I’m a 12/14 so not necessarily large but my legs do rub.

Hatinafield · 25/03/2022 21:37

Some lovely ideas on this thread!

Icequeen01 · 25/03/2022 22:12

This company popped up on my FB and I've bought a couple of tops from there now and I'm about to order some trousers. I am older than you and have a post meno tum! I hate it, having been slim for most of my life.

Their clothes are usually one size but if you watch their FB lives which are 3 times a week (and I am strangely hooked on the chit chat from the girls on there!) they show how to style some of their clothes - I never like the look of the clothes strangely on their website but love a lot of them when I see them live.

www.goose-island.co.uk/collections/most-recent

JanisMoplin · 26/03/2022 07:46

I have been meaning to order this top from Hush which looks flattering.

www.hush-uk.com/mimi-puff-sleeve-t-shirt-periwinkle-blue/005460-1563.html

And also this top from Sosandar for summer. Jersey but has the all important elasticated hem. www.sosandar.com/mocha-relaxed-fit-jersey-t-shirt?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIq8qplqTj9gIVhGDmCh0cDQ5FEAQYASABEgJg7PD_BwE#241=238&fo_c=2425&fo_k=cb945cfa099def891b5ad27e0a0ca913&fo_s=gplauk

I think I definitely need to buy less but spend more. Multipack of cotton tees from Rapanui or Next no longer work for me.

Rina66 · 26/03/2022 08:33

Those tops are gorgeous @JanisMoplin but I'm a 36DD and really need a v neck or lower scoop neck - sadly round necks just don't work on me anymore, in the same way that lower waist jeans don't, my whole middle third needs clever dressing now!

LabraDabraDoo · 26/03/2022 08:34

@JanisMoplin

I have been meaning to order this top from Hush which looks flattering.

www.hush-uk.com/mimi-puff-sleeve-t-shirt-periwinkle-blue/005460-1563.html

And also this top from Sosandar for summer. Jersey but has the all important elasticated hem. www.sosandar.com/mocha-relaxed-fit-jersey-t-shirt?gclid=EAIaIQobChMIq8qplqTj9gIVhGDmCh0cDQ5FEAQYASABEgJg7PD_BwE#241=238&fo_c=2425&fo_k=cb945cfa099def891b5ad27e0a0ca913&fo_s=gplauk

I think I definitely need to buy less but spend more. Multipack of cotton tees from Rapanui or Next no longer work for me.

I also saw that top and might order it. Love the blue colour too. It has great reviews.
OP posts:
Bickles · 26/03/2022 08:35

I have the above soya concept t shirt in all colours. Think I got it from tk Maxx. Really flattering.

Bickles · 26/03/2022 08:39

In U.K. Zalando sell them

trickyex · 26/03/2022 08:56

Great thread.
I am skinny but with a wide middle and I have found that tops like the Phase Eight one linked to at the to.
are best, not too puffy, with a wide neck.
I also think woven material is a bit more flattering or draped viscose. Jersey can be unflattering unless its quite heavy.
I think Hush is a good label to look at. And long patterned dresses with a denim jacket is a great look for a weekend away,
Can anyone some nice but comfy trainers to go with crops/dresses? Ideally not white.

MaryStuart · 26/03/2022 09:01

I got this recently. It’s v flattering and great for spring / summer:

www.johnlewis.com/and-or-honesty-floral-blouse-multi/p6066337

Garimond · 26/03/2022 09:08

Have a look at this op which addresses this very issue:

[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tFigLE1RiKg]

Hope you have a good holiday! Smile

Garimond · 26/03/2022 09:09

Sorry will try that link again

JoanThursday · 26/03/2022 09:27

I've found my people!

Just north of 50 here, always been apple shaped but the tum has definitely thickened in recent months.

There was a pic upthread of a lovely dress from Hush. I have a couple from past seasons that are really flattering - the style is 'penelope'. I always get complements when I wear it.

www.hush-uk.com/penelope-maxi-dress-pop-floral-black-pink/004743-3877.html

MaryStuart · 26/03/2022 09:36

@JoanThursday - I was looking at that dress. But I’m quite short (5’3) so was wondering if it would be too long for me. How tall are you, if you don’t mind me asking?

JoanThursday · 26/03/2022 09:52

@MaryStuart - hmm I'm quite a bit taller than you! I'm 5.8 and the dress hits my leg about 4 inches above my ankle bone.

Family143 · 26/03/2022 09:54

@Bickles They look perfect. What's the sizing like please?

MaryStuart · 26/03/2022 09:55

Thanks @JoanThursday, as I suspected then. Too long for me!

Bickles · 26/03/2022 10:05

I’m a 16 on top due to the 34G boobs I mentioned, and I got a L and they are roomy but don’t drown me.

Curlingstone · 26/03/2022 10:30

Thanks for the link @Garimond
I'm now a size 14 barrel having been an 8-10 hourglass all my life. I'm guilty of most of the styling faux pas shown in the vid BlushDefo some tips I can put into action, I'd been finding shopping so demoralising

Family143 · 26/03/2022 10:36

That's great @Bickles. I am going to order some. Thank you Smile

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