A hypothetical - what do you think?

[Soysol]

If your DP/DH were to pass away, would you be comfortable with having their ex wife attend the funeral?

As a stepmum I be actually horrified if SC mum asked me this question.

She would absolutely be welcome. Just because I'm with HD doesn't wipe out their shared history, also what about the kids and the impact of not let their their mum attend and say goodbye. Her grief or wishes aren't any less than mine. Baffling anyone else would think otherwise.

This is less of a SP question and more of a general are you a decent human being question.

Just because I'm with HD doesn't wipe out their shared history it's precisely becuase of their shared history I wouldn't want her there

@MouldyPotato I get that. I think it's completely dependent if there been abuse and how the kids feel about it all.

If she was gonna go nuts abs make it about her then I would consider options but generally might ask the kids what they wanted.

I realise that as a SM I have hit the lottery with my DSCs mum and she's a dream. I realise this isn't the case for all.
At end of the day it would be about the kids and what's DH would have wanted.

Ps I'm sorry you have had a awful time with the mum, it can make such a impact to MH and family dynamics