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Am I wrong for saying my partner can't have his son for a whole week in summer holidays when I'm due to give birth by csection at very beginning of summer holiday?

114 replies

Paige2354 · 26/06/2015 14:10

Basically I want to know if I am being selfish in saying that my partner can't have his son for a whole week during the summer holidays after im due to give birth to his daughter by c section right at the beginning of the summer holidays. I've said its ok to keep to the arrangement of having him every other weekend at this time but I've never had a c section before I don't know what its going to be like and how il be. I also don't know how my baby will be with sleep etc and we live in a tiny flat with hardly enough room to swing a cat. Am I being out of order?

OP posts:
TrixLestrange · 26/06/2015 14:11

Yes yabu

AllThatGlistens · 26/06/2015 14:12

Oh god..

Don your tin hat OP.

dancemom · 26/06/2015 14:12

What would you do if you had a resident child?

Paige2354 · 26/06/2015 14:15

There the thing I do already have 2 resident children and he has one resident child in a 2 bedroom flat

OP posts:
flagnogbagnog · 26/06/2015 14:15

Hell yes, yabu!

YAsoNBU · 26/06/2015 14:18

Oh God ...

enderwoman · 26/06/2015 14:19

How old is the child? My secondary school age children are able to knock up meals like lasagne and could take a younger child out to the park/shops to pick bits and pieces up so would be an asset.

BreacaBoudica · 26/06/2015 14:19

Of course you are being unreasonable. Stop it.

JasperDamerel · 26/06/2015 14:20

YABU, as I'm assuming that you are in favour of the siblings having a good relationship. But I think it's perfectly reasonable to expect your DP to pull his weight and look after both his son and you during this time - cooking, housework, entertaining his DS etc.

downgraded · 26/06/2015 14:20

oh hohohoho :)

Yes, YABU.

However YWNBU to require him to run his arse ragged for that time. Don't be tempted to overdo it.

But unless you are planning to ban your own kids from the house too, you can't ban his.

NerrSnerr · 26/06/2015 14:21

I can see where you're coming from but I would worry that they would feel excluded from the family.

LadyintheRadiator · 26/06/2015 14:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Paige2354 · 26/06/2015 14:21

The child is 4

OP posts:
TinyManticore · 26/06/2015 14:21

If you don't have room in your house for all of the children, why are you having more? I really honestly never say things like that, but how can you say he can't have his son round because you've just given birth to his daughter? How heartless.

downgraded · 26/06/2015 14:22

4 kids in a two bedroom flat!

I think you need your head looking at :)

Iggi999 · 26/06/2015 14:22

You currently have three Dcs between you who share one bedroom in your flat, another who lives elsewhere, and are having a fifth? Confused
Is it that your partner doesn't take time off when the other child comes and so you would be expected to look after him even if you'd had your section? I would agree that would not be on.

Paige2354 · 26/06/2015 14:23

Yes he will not take the week off work to look after him

OP posts:
Paige2354 · 26/06/2015 14:24

It's not an ideal situation no but things happen and at present can't afford a bigger property

OP posts:
Iggi999 · 26/06/2015 14:25

How will the child be looked after then, suppose you weren't at home due to baby, who normally minds him?

BrokenByA3YearOld · 26/06/2015 14:25

yes YABVU

is the polite way of saying it

Paige2354 · 26/06/2015 14:26

If I wasn't home he wouldn't be coming that's the joke of the situation his own mother does not work either

OP posts:
NickiFury · 26/06/2015 14:26

There's so much wrong with your posts but I will confine myself to your question. Yes YABU, utterly. That said if I was his Mum I wouldn't want him with you if his Dad isn't going to be around to help when he is so clearly unwanted by the person who would be caring for him.

MagicAlwaysLeadsToTrouble · 26/06/2015 14:27

Are you together? Or seperated?

Your OP is very confusing.

Iggi999 · 26/06/2015 14:28

Well your partner will have paternity leave at some point so bring him then. He doesn't normally come for a week in the holidays at all? Isn't that unusual, I would think a non-resident parent would want to take some annual leave to see more of their child. How old other Dcs are is significant.

NoraRobertsismyguiltypleasure · 26/06/2015 14:28

Well, if he's not going to be there to actually be with and care for that child, then no you'll have quite enough on your plate. Ywnbu .