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Original poster

How often do you have sex?

151 replies

Lights22 · 14/02/2023 22:45

Just that really?

Pre children DH and I had sex maybe 5 times a month on average. Now it's maybe that many times a year 😱

For context our children have never slept through so for 5 years I've not had a good night's sleep. We still love each other, hug, laugh, snuggle, enjoy each other's company etc etc

Not many people talk about how sex changes over time. So now I'm curious, how many times do you have sex?

Happy valentine's day 😘❤️

OP posts:
MyMachineAndMe · 15/02/2023 22:19

I also occasionally use a weed vape thing and have found that being stoned makes me want it more! 😂

jellybelly44 · 15/02/2023 22:21

Once or twice a month. Not enough for me really but dh has some issues and everything has to be planned in advance iyswim. Also apparently it has to be when dc are either sleeping or not in so that's another barrier. It gets me down if I'm honest. He's 13 years older than me and I sometimes wonder what I've done because I can only see it going downhill rather than improving. I get jealous when friends talk about their sex lives as ours feels very clinical in comparison.

Luckily he is loving and tactile in other ways but my god do I miss a spontaneous shag once in a while.

Mammyloveswine · 15/02/2023 22:22

Every 2 weeks ish but then we'll do it around 3/4 days in a row...

OnlyYellowRoses · 15/02/2023 22:47

Depends on how tired we are or how busy we've been that week really. On average it's usually about twice a week, some weeks it's nightly and other weeks if we've been ill or had something upsetting happen, then we don't.
There's always lots of intimacy though, cuddle up every night and kiss lots.
It's not always easy and we've both said about loving the weeks when we've been more 'active' but there's 4 children in our house, two are nocturnal teens so can be a bit awkward to get any alone time. I'm 34 and he's 51.

rebekahnorris · 15/02/2023 22:54

MavisFlump · 15/02/2023 06:16

Never.
Cba.

Loll love it

BrutusMcDogface · 15/02/2023 23:10

Judeisnotobscure · 15/02/2023 21:34

@WorryMcGee you have a new baby and have been through surgery and chemo, you’re an incredible woman! I understand how your self image has suffered but seriously you are not repulsive, your partner will be grateful every day to have you by his side. Please be kind to yourself 💗

@WorryMcGee - what Jude said. 💐

Lonelylonelylonely · 15/02/2023 23:20

DP and I don't live together. We see each other maybe 4 days/nights a week (Fri- Mon plus a weekday night). Usually every night plus morning, but if he's in a rush in the morning then perhaps just in the evening so between 4-8 times per week which is good for me. If we're on holiday it might be more often.

I think you prioritise it more when not living together though. With ex-h if we had a child-free night it was serveral times per night, but we could go months without.

It all depends how much you are happy with.

FamilyLife2point4 · 15/02/2023 23:20

about twice per week - together 20 years, 2kids

newlysingle1 · 15/02/2023 23:31

PermanentTemporary · 14/02/2023 23:22

2-3 times a week. But relatively new relationship, children old enough to be out of the house a lot of the time. Terrified I'll lose my drive with menopause, it's the best thing in my life.

You won't that is when I found mine ha

Bigpinktrain · 16/02/2023 07:30

3-4 times a week, together 17 years.

We both have fairly high sex drives and need each other in that way. I love it 😄

mamnotmum · 16/02/2023 07:33

Approx once a week.

Been together 20 years - 3 kids.

It's hard when people feel mismatched in this way. Hubby would prefer once a day. I'd prefer once a month.

yesterdayisgone · 16/02/2023 07:36

At least 3 times a week .

afty · 16/02/2023 16:52

Early 30s, two DCs under 10.
Not done it since Christmas ... Blush

CakeCrumbs44 · 17/02/2023 15:31

After my kids were born my DH and I very very rarely had sex. Only about 3 times in the 2.5 years since my second was born.

However when she was 2.5 I discovered romance novels (also coincided with quite a reduction in frequency of breastfeeding which probably helped). Now DH and I have sex about 3 times a week and it's great. The books have given me some interesting ideas as well and we've just bought a load of stuff from LoveHoney to try out

Highly recommend steamy books to spice up the bedroom!

dalmation4046 · 17/02/2023 15:43

MyMachineAndMe · 15/02/2023 22:19

I also occasionally use a weed vape thing and have found that being stoned makes me want it more! 😂

Oh my god yes! It feels amazing when stoned - I think for me it's because I'm fully relaxed and I just let go! No overthinking, no self consciousness. It's amazing!

MyMachineAndMe · 17/02/2023 21:37

dalmation4046 · 17/02/2023 15:43

Oh my god yes! It feels amazing when stoned - I think for me it's because I'm fully relaxed and I just let go! No overthinking, no self consciousness. It's amazing!

Show quote history

I think that's true for me as well.

@CakeCrumbs44 yes to the steamy stories as well! Porn does nothing for me at all but reading a well written and believable sex scene gets me weak at the knees!

Interestedonlooker · 22/02/2023 10:21

We have 2 DCs (twins) who are just over 2 y/o.
Its been almost 3 years now since we last DTD.
I hate it, but the DCs are only now just sleeping through the night, so who knows - we might even begin sharing a bed again sometime.

ThomasTheWankEngine · 01/03/2023 21:18

If I'm lucky twice a year

SunshineLollipopsAndRainbows · 02/03/2023 22:45

Thomasthewankengine brilliant username! 🤣🤣🤣

ThomasTheWankEngine · 03/03/2023 09:12

SunshineLollipopsAndRainbows · 02/03/2023 22:45

Thomasthewankengine brilliant username! 🤣🤣🤣

Needs must! 😇😀

PinotPony · 03/03/2023 09:38

DP and I only meet up every couple of weeks but make up for it when we do!

34and3 · 03/03/2023 20:53

About 4 times a year. Three kids. I'm 34 he's 42.

LucyLeave · 03/03/2023 23:14

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DGConsultant · 03/03/2023 23:20

I'm a jealous sod, reading the majority of these comments. Single, no action in over 3 years. Carry on...

LucyLeave · 03/03/2023 23:34

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