What do you consider to be vanilla?

[quirkycutekitch]

And what's the next step up from vanilla & has it got a name?

[BlueberryWafer]

Vanilla to me would be touching, oral sex and vaginal sex (straight vanilla sex, anyway)

A bit kinky would be anal, a finger up the man's bum, light spanking, hair pulling, dressing up, handcuffs

Very kinky would be water sports, whips, nipple clamps...

[hospitalworry]

For me nipple clamps (also genital and nipple piercing) isn't outre
Anything bum related IS
Most other things I can imagine aren't

[BlueberryWafer]

Anything to do with pain is kinky imo, which includes nipple clamps etc. everyone has their own boundaries on what they consider "normal" sex. For example for a gay man, anal sex would probably be vanilla.

[pocketsaviour]

Yeah by facial I mean ejaculating on my face. Or someone else's face, whatever. (Tip: close your eyes. Semen stings.)

Into the "Kinky" category I'd put light BDSM - so maybe floggings and hard spankings but no drawing blood or hard bruising. Bondage. Very specific roleplays, e.g. humiliation, house invasion, cuckolding. Piss play and dogging would probably fall into this. And probably male chastity as well. And ball gags. And cum play.

"Very kinky" would be hard BDSM e.g. choking, punch play, needle play. Anything to do with poo. CBT (cock and ball torture.) Vomit play (yeah it's a thing.)

"Lifestyle fetish" then you've got your 247 BDSMers, your adult babies, furries, and people into extreme body modification. Oh and feeders.

Like I said the line is going to be different for everyone!

[RainbowFlutterby]

furries?

[pocketsaviour]

I can't believe there are still people who haven't heard of furries

[UnknownMoniker]

furries?

People who dress as cartoon animals,

[AyeAmarok]

For me, vanilla = mostly missionary sex, probably no oral.

I'd say "normal" is sex in various positions, oral sex, occasional quickies in adventurous places, nice lingerie, possibly some basic sex toys.

Anything more than that would be kinky. Anal would be "kinky".

[UnknownMoniker]

I tend to agree with pockets list

But wouldn't class anal as vanilla.

[Orangeanddemons]

What's house invasion?

[SunnyBaudelaire]

gosh every day is a school day on mumsnet!!
I have HEARD of 'pegging' but did not know it had a name!

[SqueezyCheeseWeasel]

Fucking hell. Time to hide this topic

[Branleuse]

i think its completely subjective. I think Vanilla is a bit of a derogatory term anyway for people to assume that other peoples sex lives are more boring than theirs, and i say that as someone who loves all manner of weird kink as well as much more ordinary loving sex stuff,

[Orangeanddemons]

I may be narrow minded, but I really don't think I am.

But I cannot for the life of me, in any circumstances would want to lick someone's arsehole, or have a load of spunk shot in my face. What on earth is appealing about either of these activities is beyond me

[Pantah630]

Do accidental facials count as vanilla or slightly kinky during mutual masturbation?

I quite fancy a go at pegging but don't think DH would be up for it. I agree with pocket list but would put anal as mild kink.

[UnknownMoniker]

By the way they are called facials, because sperm is proven to have excellent rejuvenating properties. Apply directly to the skin or ingested.

Gives you a healthy glow

[notthestereotype]

Well me and my gf don't use toys, although everyone seems to assume we must, because we secretly crave penis grrrrrrr so are obviously using a massive double ended strap on We are by no means vanilla though. To me, vanilla is sticking to the same positions and playing it safe. But anyway, it's completely subjective.

[DoinMiFuckinHeadIn]

I must be very vanilla cos I don't know what most of the things mentioned on this thread actually are

[Nepotism]

It's threads like this that make me terrified of online dating after 30 years with STBXH.

[JohnFarleysRuskin]

I agree that vanilla is a derogatory term for other people's 'boring' sex. I think originally vagina suggested people who only do missionary.

Now it suggests people who do many things but are so boring that they draw the line at pegging people in furry outfits in cars with phil Mitchell.

[amothersplaceisinthewrong]

What is "Rimming"

Not 100% sure what a facial is

Pegging I had never heard of til I read this thread, but it sounds vile

No thanks to anal,

LOL at John Farleys last coment

[mrsdavidbowie]

Laughing out loud here.

[OpiesOldLady]

As a sub/switch, I certainly don't use the word vanilla in a derogatory way. To me, it's just 'normal' sex which doesn't involve any kinky play at all.

Rimming is when you lick in and around your partners anus. Pegging, I really enjoy. It's the whole power trip thing for me. And knowing that my sub likes it aswell.

[Quietattheback]

See, now I'm tempted to ask DH if he wants to do something a 'bit kinky' for Fathers Day and then turn up with a huge strap on saying "well Mumsnet said it was only one step up from vanilla, what's your problem?!".

Just for the craic.