Single Mum not intersted in dating single dads any

[Killerqueen777]

As the title goes single Mum to one and just not interested in dating a man with kids. I dont want the responsibility of another at the moment. I dont even want more of my own as i had a bad birth. Most of the men i know are single parents have children with different women who they dont even see. And people try and act like you're a hypocrite for not wanting to indulge chaos, impulsivity and neglience. And yes there are the exceptions of good dads who were in long term relationships that failed but they're not common round here

Ok 🤷‍♀️

This sounds like response to something? How have you found dating single child-free men?

Then don’t?

My husband was a single dad when I met him. I was childless. The only baggage he brought was his guilt over his DS’s turbulent childhood, which resulted in him being a doting (if somewhat overprotective) father to our own DS.

It’s not all doom and gloom.

So? Date who you want, it's your choice!

It is a thing. I had a lot of offers from divorced men with kids....No, thank you. Wanted single man , never married, never having kids with another woman but me

Only very rich men can afford a second wife with few kids...I know two millionaires who took on a wife with kids, adopted the kids, secured their future etc....the reason being: 1. One was desperate to have his own offspring to leave his inheritance and mark in the world, so he took one with 2 kids already but she gave him the offspring he wanted 2. The other was very very boring but very very lonely and rich, so he just took someone here from abroad

When I divorced my ex-husband and started dating some while later I decided I was looking to date a man with no children of his own. I didn't want to blend families for many reasons and didn't feel it in the best interests of my own two children who were still relatively young at the time.
Worked for me - my husband and I have been together almost a decade and married nearly 5 years.

@CatchyRocksonSong Eh?!!! Why would he need to be rich? My husband is by no means a high earner. I had two kids from my first marriage when we met. All good here.

I agree. I dated four men with children over the years and there was zero drama and they were a very involved parent. My current partner has a teenager who is with us a lot of the time and it's absolutely fine and doesn't mean I am expected to do any parenting for them.

Not true, my DP has no children. There are men out there. Dont be so negative.

Op, nothing wrong with what you want. Just stick with it. But you dont need to announce it lol. You do you.

There are amazing men out there who dont have kids and will date mums....just keep looking

I really couldn't give a toss whom you choose to date, or not.

I am a bit confused why anyone else would care

Wowwww but offensive....my DP isnt a "sap" and my children's dad pays towards their clothes/school trips/food....

Yes DP contributes to the house because wowww guess what he uses the water and electric and gas and WiFi etc how ridiculous your post is.

Good luck to your adult sons 🙄

Yeah hes just not a decent guy then. If he cant recognise your children come first then I have no idea how you lasted as long as you did
My DP is the total opposite of your ex

Not always the case

But a man with kids is more likely to understand kids and what the need from you. Also if I'm honest, I'd wonder why a man without kids would want to be involved with someone who already has kids. It's busy, it's child focused, there's far less or no free adult time, I don't get the appeal at all

I know of someone who has 4 kids and her partner has none, it does happen so dont listen to the negativity nancies, they are probably just jealous that you are taking away the childless men.

Im not negative. Men will eventually get bored and move on if a child isnt theres biologically. If that happens in your case then your kids will be impacted. He has no ties to your kids whatsoever nor is he legally binded to you ie marriage, if you were to breakup. What if he left for a younger model? I dont think childless single men are in it for the long run. Sorry. Does he want kids with you?

Rich men or unemployed men who dont GAF about who will pay for the children.
I have 2 DC with my ex. He has 3 with his second partner. Hasn't paid maintenance for over 10 years and doesnt see DC any more.

I think your view is fairly logical. You already have a priority in your own child, trying to have a relationship with someone who has priority in their own child(ren) further complicates things. Though perhaps don't totally write it off as you may miss out on a great relationship. Hard agree on men with multiple children from different women.

Do what you like.
You might limit the dating pool, but if you're ok with that then go for it.
I know a few single mums who've married or had long term partnerships with childless men.

We have covered all these important types of conversations very early on and what we want from the relationship/our lives very much match.

He would like to marry at some point so he does have rights/ties to my children should god forbid something happens to me as he loves them very much.

Any relationship can break up, mothers and fathers divorce and separate, marriage or being a blood parent doesnt mean anything for how committed someone is or whether they stay together (you have read other posts right?! 😂)

He is an old soul and I am a young one, he was not interested in relationships with women his age, and honestly thought he'd just stay single for the rest of his life (and happy to do so) because he really values an emotional connection over a physical one. What he was looking for he couldnt find until we met. There is no chance he'd leave for "a younger model" he just isnt like that, hes not superficial but for information, people put him much closer to my age looks wise than he actually is.

He certainly doesnt find life or the children boring he in fact says the opposite that we have added such value to his life. Appreciate it is very rare but your misgivings are unfounded and people dont always meet the stereotypes.

P.s no need to say " sorry " 😂 your thoughts on the matter dont change our relationship....we have been together over 2 years now and very happy 😀

Well that's lucky for your husband then, that you have a responsible ex who pays a decent amount of money to keep his own children. You say 'pays towards' but I'm assuming he covers at least half of all it costs to raise them, and you pay the other half? But there are plenty of women out there who have ex partners (or just random men they happened to get impregnated by) who pay very little or nothing at all towards the cost of their own children's upbringings.

If my sons are paying for a house, food and clothes, holidays and other incidentals for any children I'd like for it to be their children. Not someone else's.