HUsband hit me this evening

[PinkPanthreess]

Husband hit me 4 times this evening

please tell me there is no going back from this and I need to leave

to leave safely ? i dont think he will try ti forcibly stop me

im leaving the house and the 19 year old DC at home right now, to him so his life can continue peacefully without me, I don't know how much easier I can make it on him? as I would love it if he would be the one to leave, and I get the house and the DC at home here.

No one else was here, it was so terrifying , unexpected, shocking

The rage on his face

Horrifying

I agree those saying call police asap because you need this on record. Do not forgive under any circumstances. A line has been crossed.

what will they do? I have no proof

The children don't want you to call the police because when they arrive it will make it real. But it is real. And it needs to be addressed. The problem is of his making, not yours.

You need be strong and do this. It needs to be official. He simply cannot hit you 4 times and get away with it. You should not allow it.

By not reporting him, he knows that he has got away with it. He knows that he can do anything to you. He knows he can do it again.
He knows that you are scared of him.
You are setting the wrong model for your children, which says violence is okay in a relationship. Is this what you want?

You need to have him reported so no other poor sod will ever get other with him and destroy her life and life of her children. Claire’s law.
You owe it to yourself and to your kids.
Fuck him. Do it- I won’t be easy but your future self will thank you million times x

Where is he now? Is your Mum's house nearby?

If you need to talk to someone now, this line is open 24/7

National Domestic Abuse Helpline, 24-hours a day, on 0808 2000 247

Please get out now and go to your mother's. If you stay, for whatever reason, he will never respect you and is likely to do this again.
Don't put yourself in danger of this happening again..Don't show yourself to be vulnerable.
Go now. If it isn't safe to do so phone the police to get you out or ask your mother to phone the police for you.
There is no imagined provocation of any kind which makes this acceptable.

so deeply sorry, this is an awful thing to go through. But he has violently assaulted you. What would you do if a man hit one of your children? You deserve the same care and respect; call the police. And contact a women’s domestic abuse hotline asap. Take care x

It’s better for the DC in the long run if you do call the police. If they are female DC you need to show them what to do if this ever happened to them. If they are male you need to show them that male violence will not be tolerated and covered up by women.
The police will come. You will make a statement. If the police decide there is not enough evidence to push for a conviction then they will advise you of that - but it will remain on record.

You will not gain anything by staying in this situation and brushing this under the rug. This is your moment, seize it.

This is 100% the end and not something you can or should come back from.

After your update about your children not wanting you to call the police- I think you need to call them even more. Your children should see how serious this is. Is sounds like they have been raised in an environment where it was normalised that you get treated without respect. You have to show them that this is not normal, that treating you with violence and humiliation is not normal.

Please leave him and please call the police

You wouldn't accept it if someone came up to you in the street and belted you.

Why accept it from person who is supposed to be your life partner?

Leave
Phone the police. (Sod what anyone else says).

Op, why are you leaving? Does your husband recognise he’s done wrong?

What country are you in? I'm in the UK, my ex entered my house and assaulted me. I had no proof. The police asked me what happened and then when to his home and took him to the police station, I think they arrested him I don't remember. He was humiliated in front of his new partner. They gave him a hard time, ultimately the CPS dropped the case due to lack of evidence but I was glad I called the police as it showed him a consequence and that I wasn't going to just take it. Also the police said they gave him a hard time and he was humiliated and embarrassed.

Did he leave any marks on you, that's evidence if he did.

Your children don't know what's for the best, he should be given the message that he can't push you around and repeatedly hit you.

Sorry this had happened to you. It's shit.

I’m so sorry OP. My ex assaulted me on a number of occasions but I never reported it and really regret it.

Now that I’m divorcing him he has denied all
abuse and it’s his word against mine.

when you are safe and up to it I urge you to report him for assault.

wishing you well OP x

Obviously it would be better if the abusive arsehole who assaulted her left, but that would require the police.

You need to report him to the police, if he gets arrested he may get bailed to not be allowed back to the family home which would mean you could go back home. Step 1, ring the police, step 2 on Monday get a solicitor & get advice on next steps & where you stand financially, you may get legal aid due to the domestic violence, the crime number from your report will help prove this.

Domestic violence & abuse don't just have to be physical, the name calling & constant putting you down is abuse in itself.

I hope you are out of there & safe, reporting him isn't for revenge, it's for your own personal safety.

Oh OP, how awful. I would go to your mum's, but also phone the police this embeds to be on record. And take photos of any bruising, even if it comes up tomorrow. Your kids don't get a say.

Your DC think your H was ‘pushed to it’? This is worrying as they are normalising / excusing violence. It is not ok for a man to hit his partner (or vice versa). You need to show them that what has happened is absolutely not ok and that the right thing to do is speak out about it. You do this by reporting it to the police and getting it on record.

You need to report it to the police. Your dc will understand and also needs to see with their own eyes that his behaviour is illegal and not something women should tolerate. Might be a hard lesson to learn. Otherwise what are you teaching your child? That it’s okay to hit women?!

It doesnt sound like your kids will lie, they would just rather pretend it never happened. You calling the police is forcing them to face a truth they dont want to face.

But you need to do it, for you and ultimately, for them.

I was you once, I called the police. I am sitting on MY sofa in MY house on my own in peace. Call them xx

Are you going to your DM?

Why?

Please call the police. You need to report this, it doesn’t matter if you don’t have bruises or broken bones to show for it. That way you have it on record, and then, god forbid, should anything else happen, the police will be able to see that a previous report has been made. Furthermore, it will show your child that the police take domestic violence seriously and that you deserve protection - it’s very worrying that they are minimising what has happened to you and they don’t seem concerned about your safety. The law is on your side and your husband and child need to understand that what has happened tonight is completely unacceptable. Please stay safe x