Husband of 15 years becoming really smutty

[dontbesillyhenry]

I've started to notice he's becoming more smutty that usual laughing at more smut and watching more puerile tv programmes. I've tried telling him I'm shocked and he seems to have really changed yet he starts getting aggressive and pulling faces at me telling me I'm controlling. It's not the kind of man I want to be with yet he tries to make me feel unreasonable any ideas please

Its hard to tell if you are potentially being unreasonable. Could you give any examples of his behaviour? What are these televisions programmes hes suddenly watching?

Things like celebrity juice and sat giggling about tits fanny etc oooh I want to shag her. Also when I came home just he was watching something where someone was putting a condom on a plastic Willy he just is acting like a 12 year old school boy suddenly

What do you count as smutty and puerile?

Are we talking game of thrones, south park, Tosh.0, the horror channel type type B movies, love island or what?

You sound fun

Celebrity Juice is shit though

Celebrity Juice is great though.

You come across as a bit of a prude OP.

Well I can see why the sudden invasion of smut is disconcerting if he wasnt like that before. I hardly think it makes op a prude if she isn't keen on her husband sounding off like a Benny Hill/stringfellow hybrid.

I'm not prudish I just don't think sex/farting/boobs etc are something to sit guffawing with laughter at. And he never used to. Yet when mentioned to him he gets his arse in his hands with me and his face goes all contorted and aggressive

Fair enough OP but your posts don't read as "I don't like this" they come across as "I find this gross so he shouldn't be watching them at all"

How old is he, OP? Is it possible he might have a touch of dementia?

I can appreciate a good tit's/fanny joke as much as anyone (a lot of Sarah Millican's stand up is quite crass but spot on and makes me laugh), but not Roy Chubby Brown type stuff. I can't watch South Park, I find it really obnoxious, yet I love the Simpsons. If he's mainly laughing at the crude words being used, and that's all he ever wants to watch, that would probably get on my nerves too. The ooh I'd shag her thing wouldn't bother me too much, as long as he wasn't saying it about anyone he actually knows irl.

He shouldn't be getting aggressive with you, does he raise his voice etc? When did this start? Do you have dc?

Dementia?! That escalated quickly...

I was also thinking Dementia.

Sorry but ROFL @ dementia!

Cos dementia is a laugh?
There are lots of medical conditions that affect behaviour.

In seriousness though if he's never shown any interest in anything like this before, for over 15 years, this is a personality change, along with the anger and aggression.
It might seem OTT to some, but I'd be concerned about my DP's health if he had such a dramatic change. He wouldn't find a plastic cock or someone putting a condom on it funny, nor is he interested in reality tv. I'd find it really disrespectful if he said he's like to fuck someone, and again it isn't something he's ever said or hinted at (in my presence, what he says away from me is his own business). If all that changed, yes I'd be concerned.

Is he doing anything else out of the ordinary?

I have to say I was thinking dementia too.

It does sound odd if it is new.

Plus to be honest it is not controlling to find someone else's behaviour unpleasant. Especially if you live with them and love them and see them turning into a twatty school boy before your eyes.

Also if he is getting aggressive that is not on.

I have loads of TV interests that my hubby doesn't like. If he really doesn't like a certain programme (medical documentary springs to mind) I would not watch it with him in the room. He is probably more squeamish than I am. So when you live with someone and you share time and space with them watching stuff they find unsettling or offensive in front of them isn't really on and I don't think it is controlling to find that kind of thing not on.

People change, as does their sense of humour.

Has he started laughing at Mrs Brown’s Boys? If he has, I think he needs help

My first thought was dementia too.
It was on the news in the last year or so that people developing dementia sense of humour changes, becoming less sophisticated.
I assume there are other signs too, but this was an early indicator.

I was also thinking brain disease. Friend a school years ago, her mum 50's started being over friendly with men out of the blue and due to brain tumour

OP you shouldn't be laughing because people are suggesting dementia. It was my first thought.
Sometimes we do not see what is in front of us.

Please tell me he's 100

Dementia is a possibility.

Behavior variant frontotemporal dementia (bvFTD) can strike at any age.

Behavioral variant frontotemporal dementia (bvFTD) can strike at any age.