hi there
after a discussion with dp last night it transpires that approx 80% of his past lovers could orgasm during sex.
i immediately felt this was rubbish and that the majority must've been faking it.
nonetheless its left me feeling inadequate and a freak, and like im not doing something right... can you share your thoughts/experiences please?
disclaimer: i do orgasm, the conditions have to be just so. and dp has not put any pressure on me about this. i brought it up with him, he doesnt see it as an issue or think there is something wrong with me. thats just my thinking.
----
If you've found this page in your search of the best sex toys that can help you achieve orgasm and have been recommended by fellow Mumsnet users, you might find our guide to the best sex toys for women useful. Hope this helps! MNHQ
Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody
Relationships
A Poll.... about sex and female orgasms
chocolatepuff · 03/03/2013 12:39
Well since all most of my orgasms are G spot and A spot , that is when it happens for me and it is very intense and very wet. 
Oh I think it definitely gets better with age.... Up until I was about 40, I always wanted hard fucking, hated the idea of making love 
But I never used to orgasm, although I didn't really care because I still enjoyed it.
These days are different - I find it much easier to come, still never through intercourse alone, I need clitoral stimulation, but then it's quite easy.
I have had loads of a few partners over time. But at the ripe old age of 42, it's only now that I orgasm regularly with someone else 
coming through bumsex... i cant imagine, wow!
ive been reading up a bit about it, i read your advice maggiemaggie thank you, i feel so inspired im determined to work on this! i feel so awakened, i always thought 'i cant have g spot orgasms' and have never been with a partner who cared either way. so have just accepted it as my fate. this is it, my 30's are going to be about my orgasmic liberation.. thank you all!
Good luck OP but make sure this is a quest for you won't you? It's good that he wants you to fulfil your sexuality, but I still feel a bit uncomfortable about him mentioning his past prowess and regarding this as 'his mission'. Maybe you had to be there to get all the nuances of the conversation, but I'm still left with the impression that this is more about him than you. Have fun with the awakening though 
My h and i havent had sex for many years but looking back for the first 4 years we were together when we actually were having sex it was just an "in and out" thing and that was that.
After 7 yrs of no sex at all i had an affair when i was 30 which lasted 4 and a half years.
And BLOODY HELL sex with OM was wonderful. Once id shown him what i wanted. I had lost a lot of weight before meeting OM and got a lot more confidence and so wasnt shy about showing him what i wanted. I dont orgasm through PIV but only through clitoral stimulation and nip stimulation has given me muscular contractions that start in the stomach and move downwards IF the stimulation of my breasts is done just right.
I can only orgasm thru penetration if its in missionary and if I feel secure with the guy I'm doing it with .
The only way I can orgasm is if I grind myself on him
Was actually having an a chat with DP about this today as he asked if I was sexually frustrated after sex as I never orgasm, and he asked me a while ago if he was doing anything wrong... when I told him I've never had one, with a man or by myself! Don't get me wrong enjoy sex anyway, but it just never happens for me. Although I know he want's to please me and I think it gets to him a little bit that he can't please me to that point.
Well, it's very rare that I don't orgasm, but with clitoral stimulation.
So, usually before penetration.
I'm actually not sure if I can reach it through penetration or not. 
I'm sure I've read this exact OP on here before, I've got really weird deja vu 
I think that 80% of ex lovers is probably a bit of an exaggeration :)
My own Dp god bless him was convinced all of his 3/4 previous, (average term from 6-12 months) ex partners had screaming orgasms every time through just PIV
He says now he realises that in fact they most likely faked it (he says definitely, I say he can't be sure) because it doesn't 'feel' the same to him as it does when I orgasm through PIV (I think he means my body's involuntary reactions). I have 2 kinds of orgasm through PIV, one quite mild and the other very intense almost like from clitoral stimulation. It happens often enough but not every time, position and mood must be right.
While I love these O's my favourite is from oral clitoral stimulation.
:)
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
One thing that this thread proves is that there is no 'normal'.
There's an interesting thread here at the mo Why are so many men so selfish and entitled in bed? which has formed into (IMO) not so much a condemnation of men but rather a discusion about how to tell your sexual partner what you like, and how it feels when he doesn't seem to quite get it! That thread too shows the huge diversity of women's likes and dislikes.
dondon my DH told me about a GF he had who would always screech and shout out during sex and rake at his back. He was only 18 at the time and he says that even at that age he was very and about "the racket she was making and all the scratching". He sensed fakery :)
That's interesting Outraged. I'd like to remind everyone that sex threads could easily be started by, and read by, some random loser guy. Not saying that Op is one of them though. And if that's so I'm positive about male interest in how female orgasm works
It's interesting how different people are when it comes to touch and sexuality. However it does seems that most women need some kind of stimulation of the outer parts of the clitoris to come.
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.