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Original poster

It's about sex ... please do not read if you are eating

121 replies

abbdabb · 07/06/2011 11:22

Some things I like, some things I don't.

'D'H interprets this as rules & taboos, he believes if he wants to do something he should be able to even it's a turn off for me, if I don't he feels emasculated and supressed. Nothing major.

Apart from when he spat in my mouth during sex.

He says I have issues, low libido, I am sexually repressed, I need counselling, etc ...

I'm not & I don't!!! (good) sex has always been important to me & it was bloody fantastic with my ex.

Shouldn't sex be about mutual respect?? Am I really abnormal thinking it should be something that's enjoyable for both partners??

OP posts:
ITHOTM · 07/06/2011 11:25

Did what? What the hell was that about, spitting? Did he explain that afterwards?

fuckmepinkandcallmerosie · 07/06/2011 11:25

Oh my goodness yet another interesting first post.

Hmm
CareyFakes · 07/06/2011 11:27

Erm, I'm all for experiencing and trying out new things, but I draw the line at certain disrespectful things. If my partner spat in my mouth, I'd spit it right back at him, dirty cunt.

He sounds a right sort, bullying, forceful, spoilt, silly, childish. I'd be reconsidering my choice in partner tbh.

Thingumy · 07/06/2011 11:28

did you not know this before marrying him?

SardineQueen · 07/06/2011 11:28

"he believes if he wants to do something he should be able to even it's a turn off for me,"

he's a bastard
chuck him.

iseeyou · 07/06/2011 11:29

love the title ... spat ? ugh how gross ... he sounds like the one with issues. go to counselling with him and get him set straight that spitting during sex ... UGH ... so gross

men have such a great way of talking their way out of anything and making the woman feel like shes somehow doing/ done something wrong dont listen to any more bullshit the man had an odd sexual fetish

iseeyou · 07/06/2011 11:30

has

MilkandWine · 07/06/2011 11:30

He spat in your mouth?? WTF OP!!!

I'm sorry but that is just utterly disgusting and it is not 'pushing a taboo', it is degrading you and treating you as less than human. I actually feel ill on your behalf.

Of course sex should be mutually enjoyable and if your DH want's to do something you are really uncomfortable with you have every right to say no! Yes sometimes it is nice to try and accomodate your partners wishes within your comfort zone even if it doesn't really float your boat. But there is a MASSIVE difference between that and a partner who is trying to force you into sexual acts you really don't want to do.

What precisely are you refusing that makes him feel 'emasculated and supressed'? What the hell does this man think you SHOULD be getting upto in the bedroom??

If you had fantastic sex with your ex I would argue that far from you having a low libido it is actually your DH who is a crap shag!

iseeyou · 07/06/2011 11:30

how long have you been together ?????? any DC?

DrinkFeckArseGirls · 07/06/2011 11:31

Hope you threw up all over him. You know, cause you shoud be able to do whatever turns you on.

Dropdeadfred · 07/06/2011 11:33

eeeughh...just euuugh

worldgonecrazy · 07/06/2011 11:34

Tell him he can spit in your mouth if you can do a bj and spit the resulting goo straight back in his mouth.

Seriously, ditto to what milkandwine said.

HolyFail · 07/06/2011 11:34

He spat in your mouth?

Are you sure you knew which end you were kissing?

Hmm
gapants · 07/06/2011 11:35

Holy shit, he spat in your gob. talk about demeaning.

Sounds like a treasure....get rid.

gapants · 07/06/2011 11:35

holyfail I love your name BTW

piprabbit · 07/06/2011 11:36

So your DH would eagerly agree to any suggestions you might?
Buy a very large strap-on and tell him that you have plans...

Tortoiseonthehalfshell · 07/06/2011 11:37

Even if there was 'nothing major', the very attitude that he should be able to do something even if it is a turn off for you and if he can't he feels emasculated is utterly appalling. It shows absolutely no respect for you, and it implies that his idea of Being A Real Man is bound up with using your body as a fucktoy.

I'm so sorry, OP.

HolyFail · 07/06/2011 11:38

gapants why thank you ma'am Grin

Original poster
abbdabb · 07/06/2011 11:39

Not first post, have name changed.

We have DC's.

It's not wierd stuff, I'm just not that into someone for eg dribbling in my ear. Other things such as his running commentary on 'the day we met' (which goes on & on) I can deal with.

OP posts:
Original poster
abbdabb · 07/06/2011 11:40

worldgonecrazy - he has actually asked me to do that.

OP posts:
HolyFail · 07/06/2011 11:41

what!! he gives you running commentary of 'the day you met' you've got to be fucking joking - excuse my language Grin

I'd be like, been there, done that...get on with it matey :)

gapants · 07/06/2011 11:41

but spitting in your mouth??

Dropdeadfred · 07/06/2011 11:42

have you asked him whether his rules apply to you too?

CareyFakes · 07/06/2011 11:42

Dribbling in the ear? Is that even a 'thing'? That's fucking rank, any form of saliva not used as lubricant is a little weird for me.

I'd seriously be having words about it all. I couldn't sleep or be with a man who didn't respect my boundaries.

RudeEnglishLady · 07/06/2011 11:45

Sorry to be nosy here but what is a 'running commentary on 'the day we met' ?

Is this something he relays to you or to other people? All the time?

This post gets stranger and stranger. Anyway, FWIW, he shouldn't be doing stuff to you that you don't like and it sounds like you know that already. He sounds quite mad in general though.