❓ Archers thread #126: It’s a mystery why we’re all still listening.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed. We don't all agree on all points and most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you’d love to be on the Parish Council, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please. We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/4197199--The-Archers-spoilers-thread-6-Cant-wait-for-7-02pm-Join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to @LillianGish and @Taswama for thread title ideas, but I felt most in sympathy with @R4's suggestion. Is it me, or is the programme in the doldrums at the moment?

Haven't heard the 31/3 episode yet. Perhaps it's a gem.

Known owners of spare bedrooms.
Shula
Elizabeth (surely?)
Joy
Kirsty
Lillian
Clarrie ? (Are the Grundys still in Oliver's lovely farmhouse - who is in Will's house?)
Lynda
Alan ? Presumably he's got a vicarage?

@MissBarbary

Known owners of spare bedrooms. Shula Elizabeth (surely?) Joy Kirsty Lillian Clarrie ? (Are the Grundys still in Oliver's lovely farmhouse - who is in Will's house?) Lynda Alan ? Presumably he's got a vicarage?

Johnny and the ghastly Hannah are renting Will’s house. If she isn’t already suicidal, living with Hannah would surely do it for Alice. I don’t know how this is going to play out but I don’t want an Eastender-style misery fest each evening with Alice promising ad infinitum that she won’t drink again.

My money is on Susan and Neil taking her in. Radio Carter will not want the world knowing her prized daughter-in-law is a down-and-out drunk and will be doing her utmost to —contain gossip— “help”.

She could book herself into Grey Gables?

Is no-one interested in Rex's pigs. It sounds like LL has a patch of land that has been rewilded by accident that will now get some pigs on it.

Yup I posted (mid programme in fact! Is that sacrilege?) that we should all be waving to the Ambridge Farm Fairy!

Johnny and the ghastly Hannah are renting Will’s house

Which house has presumably turned into some sort of Lovecraftian portal to another dimension, given both they and Pat have vanished without trace.

Alice won't stay separated from Chris for long.

Women quite often leave their partners in Ambridge, then come back.

Natasha left Tom for one ....

Pat left Tony, Jill left Phil ...

Why is it always the women who leave the men?

Any. uses where it's been the other way around?

Because the men own the farms. Chris doesn't have a farm but does have a forge. Similarly immovable.

Men who leave stay left, perhaps? Nelson. Matt came back but is gone now. Roger Travers-Macy only came back to have an affair with Jennifer, not live in the village again. Thinking of her, Paddy Redmond.

And of course anyone who has gone out with Pip is likely to run for the hills unless caught because she's had their baby.

It reminds me a bit of Prince William and Katherine, with the long courtship including a short separation. If you're going to marry into the firm / farm, you really need to know it's what you want to do, forever.

Ruth ran away to New Zealand, to gather her thoughts.

It sounds like LL has a patch of land that has been rewilded by accident that will now get some pigs on it.

I admit that I did laugh a bit at Rex’s wide-eyes astonishment at how amazing it was that a patch of land had been allowed to grow wild and how great it looked, when he is supposedly running a rewilding project!

I was too annoyed to pay much attention to the ridiculous rewilding storyline but didn't they end up with some rough old ground that Borchester Land would never get permission to build on, a bit of Brookfield and a few other random fields?

I suppose Romeo left Tracey? Tom ran off to Canada for 6 months to avoid marrying Kirsty?

I think Rex's pigs are magical realist pigs. Everywhere he wishes them to go, a previously unmentioned, perfectly formed parcel of land, with buildings if needed, materialises. Hollowtree, LL woodland, where next?

Yes, Ruth is another female who ran away but then came back

Debbie and Brenda have escaped altogether. Oh, and Amy.

Dr Locke came back and promptly fell silent...

@Tulipomania

Yes, Ruth is another female who ran away but then came back

Unfortunately

@Nith

ISTR a storyline way back when Kate announced she was taking Phoebe back - in fact I think it was the one that sucked me into TA, because her behaviour made me so cross. However, I'm pretty sure that her motivation had nothing to do with maternal instinct and missing Phoebe and was, as usual totally selfish.

Kate doesn't have an ounce of maternal instinct in her body and she's a terrible mother because she has never grown up properly. Her behaviour when she was doing some kind of further education course and tried to hang around with Phoebe and her friends as if she were Phoebe's sister rather than her mother disgusted me because it's so self-centred and so delusional! Now someone in my life has actually replicated that behaviour so I sympathise with Phoebe even more. I can tell you that the sort of person that Kate is will never be of any help to someone with Alice's problems.

@HaveringWavering

It sounds like LL has a patch of land that has been rewilded by accident that will now get some pigs on it.

I admit that I did laugh a bit at Rex’s wide-eyes astonishment at how amazing it was that a patch of land had been allowed to grow wild and how great it looked, when he is supposedly running a rewilding project!

Exactly. I was very confused as I thought it must be part of the rewinding project anyway ... the modern equivalent of "wild boar" are an essential feature to keep nature in balance.

Alice must not go back to Chris, please let them remain separated.
I have been searching around for someone who would be able to help Alice, but really only Alice can help Alice, perhaps Lynda and Robert would have the qualities needed but obviously they have no link to Alice.

@Langsdestiny

Alice must not go back to Chris, please let them remain separated. I have been searching around for someone who would be able to help Alice, but really only Alice can help Alice, perhaps Lynda and Robert would have the qualities needed but obviously they have no link to Alice.

Step forward the Gills (who find dear Alice simpering in that shed)!

I have a bad feeling it will be Aunty Shula to the rescue (she did a cracking job of rehabilitating Darrell).

Shula was quite good with Freddy. He's very open, easygoing and grateful, so an easy candidate for help but in her all her striving to do the right thing, she does get it right occasionally (law of averages?).

I know Shula might not be the favourite character of most on here, but she might be just the thing for Alice right now. She doesn't seem to drink much, unlike most of Alice's family. She's not involved in Alice's life or family life to any great extent, so she wouldn't be too emotionally invested herself and would be motivated by altruism, whereas Alice wouldn't have to deal with being in the midst of all the Aldridge-Carter politics and sensitivities as her secret becomes more widely known. She can be interfering, but Alice's self-esteem is so low and she's so out of control with alcohol that might not be a bad thing. She's also got horses, which Alice likes and can get involved with as a healthy, purposeful outdoor activity!

I imagine that though probably not the people to provide close support, Brian and JD will have to face up to a few things about their parenting and family relationships if Alice is to succeed.

Debbie, somehow?