❓ Archers thread #126: It’s a mystery why we’re all still listening.

[Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g]

Thank you, @PseudoBadger, for kicking off this long, long series of Archers threads.

All views on The Archers welcome here! New blood welcomed. We don't all agree on all points and most of us are posting tongue in cheek a lot of the time, so don't worry about revealing that you’d love to be on the Parish Council, or other unusual views.

Spoilers: not on this thread, please. We don't wait for the omnibus to discuss the weeknight episodes, but we do try our best to avoid cross-contamination from www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/4197199--The-Archers-spoilers-thread-6-Cant-wait-for-7-02pm-Join-us-here, where spoilers are positively welcomed!

For newer listeners, lurkers or those who just have no idea what we're talking about, @DadDadDad has created this useful thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/radio_addicts/3557323-For-Archers-fans-a-guide-to-acronyms-on-the-long-running-discussion-threads-and-any-other-meta-thread-questions-you-may-have - BOOP point for him! (See thread for explanation.)

Thanks to @LillianGish and @Taswama for thread title ideas, but I felt most in sympathy with @R4's suggestion. Is it me, or is the programme in the doldrums at the moment?

Haven't heard the 31/3 episode yet. Perhaps it's a gem.

Ha! I like the juxtaposition of the last two posts.

I think Harrison told Kirsty about the guilty plea. It was before Alice gave birth, and I haven't listened since before that because the combination of a traumatic and upsetting new baby story and one of Lynda's interminable putting-on-a-play story is not appealing.

Even if Philip did change his mind is it really realistic that such a big case would come to court so quickly (never mind on a Maundy Thursday!) Where is the poster with expertise in human trafficking cases (so sorry I've forgotten your name)? Will it be the case that Philip and Gavin have agreed to help the police in cracking the wider ring in exchange for a reduction in their sentences? As so often in TA it feel as though after a long a careful build up of a gripping storyline it is about to be knocked on the head and wrapped up with lightning speed (the complete opposite of what is happening with the tedious Mysteries which far from showing in the course of a day, the whole history of the universe from the creation of Heaven and Earth to the Last Judgement – the end of the world seem to be dragging on until the end of the world what could have been wrapped up in a day.

Charlotte Higgins has made up her own alternate story: Guardian link.

A thought experiment: you are giving birth, six weeks early, on the back seat of a clapped-out Nissan Note outside a branch of Toys R Us on the Borchester bypass. (The BBC draws a veil over certain brand details, but you know I’m right.)
Erm, wasn't it a Riley and nowhere in Borsetshire was ever big enough to deserve (is that the right word?) a Toys R Us.
Lost the rest behind a paywall-thingy.

SW- hello young person!
Intern - I think you’re on mute again.
SW- so I am. Now listen here, you told us that Mummysnet loved the stories about Lynda’s productions. That’s why we introduced the Mystery Play story line. Well I have to tell you it hasn’t gone down well at all in our other focus groups and we’ve had to dial it back in the face of plummeting listener numbers. What do you have to say to that young person?
Intern- I told you that they talked a lot about Lynda’s plays. I was going to go on to say that my analysis showed that 70% of what they say is negative and the other 30% can be summarised as “Thank god that’s over”. I did put that in my written memo.
SW- Memos, who reads those? This is the age of Zoom, everyone knows that.
Intern- Which is great if you can get a word in occasion..
SW- well I’m glad you understand what an absolute shambles you have caused young person. Perhaps you’ll think more carefully about your “analysis” in future.

Yay! The Intern is back. They know what's going on, as opposed to some journalists that I can think of ...

Thanks for the link MayIDestroyYou (There is no paywall in the Guardian R4 you just have to press on through clicking on things like 'not now' and 'I'll do it later')

There is no paywall in the Guardian R4 you just have to press on through clicking on things like 'not now' and 'I'll do it later'
I said a paywal- thingy. I'm not keen on giving clicks to that Bastion of Wokeness so I usually give it a pass. I'm not sure, based on the beginnings of that article, that CH is enough to lure me in again.

I got through to the article easily on one click.

a clapped-out Nissan Note outside a branch of Toys R Us on the Borchester bypass.

It was a Riley. Are Toys R Us still around?

It's no wonder regular long-term listeners have missed vital plot details. The last few months have been so hit and miss it's a wonder any of us have managed to stay awake.

I find The Guardian hit and miss too, in that sometimes they just mention in a shy pained way that I've read x number of articles in the last month, and wouldn't I like to give them some money, and other times they ask me to log in. There seems no logic to it. I don't understand why they don't put in a proper paywall like The Times and The Telegraph. Maybe they're not convinced anyone would pay, and they're probably not wrong. I wouldn't. I did subscribe to The Times last year, purely for Janice Turner, but sadly once the introductory rate ran out I felt I couldn't justify the full amount just at present.

It's not just the mystery plays, I'm finding the young people's storylines all quite embarrassingly unconvincing: the caravan of love; the parish counsel; the time capsule; the admiration of the vaccine programme. I have never followed which scriptwriter it is, but is someone new/ off sick at the moment?

@R4

A thought experiment: you are giving birth, six weeks early, on the back seat of a clapped-out Nissan Note outside a branch of Toys R Us on the Borchester bypass. (The BBC draws a veil over certain brand details, but you know I’m right.) Erm, wasn't it a Riley and nowhere in Borsetshire was ever big enough to deserve (is that the right word?) a Toys R Us. Lost the rest behind a paywall-thingy.

It was indeed Jim's Riley, and Toys R Us went into liquidation at least two and possibly three years ago now.

I suspect last night of having been a Keri Davies script. It was him or Sarah Hehir.

Who is the parish counsel? Is it like a QC but a bit more parochial?

I don't understand why they don't put in a proper paywall like The Times and The Telegraph. they want readers to be able to have access to the news for free wherever they live in the world. Is that really such a terrible thing? Actually a substantial number of people do make a contribution because they support this aim which is why people who can't afford to pay can continue to read for free and is says a lot about the sort of people who read the Guardian. No-one would expect philanthropy from Telegraph readers.

@Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g

Well, I've now listened to last night's episode and my word, does it justify this thread title. Utterly dire.

Too much to hope, I suppose, that Lynda will lose interest in the Mystery Plays and the whole awful storyline will just quietly be forgotten about.

Yes it was dire/ drivel Out of character for Lynda; just eye-rollingly awful at Jill and Leonard snuggling up in the caravan

And again, why do I continue to listen?

When Rory (sorry cba to look up spelling) was pretending he had a hot date and then he didn't I had to check it was yesterday's episode, not today's.
Jill and Leonard snuggling in the caravan was unbelievable too.

R u a i r i .

(Sorry, don't mean to be officious!)

No worries @MayIDestroyYou . He needs a nickname, or has he already got one?

Baspofald, @TASWAMA

or Myson

I logged on to see what you lot thought of tonight’s offering, and also so you could tell me the bits I didn’t hear. But no one is interested enough to post.

Anyway, was it Philip who got 5 years (or half a defaced statue)? Do we know what Gavin got?

And where are they going with the nail bar? Are they going to practice the modern slavery line until they get it right?