Spoilers - RnRN accepts (and recaps) Amex so you don't have to!

[RocknRollNerd]

As requested by someone on the Lillian thread herewith a recap of yesterday's Amex:

We start off a presumably swish (but not in the Jennifer sense) Montenegrin hotel one bright sunny morning. Possibly Monday or Tuesday as there are references throughout to TigerLily coming home tomorrow (ie Wednesday in Borsetshire). Tiger is up for some early morning snuggles but Lil continues to work her Princess Di being interviewed by Martin Bashir sad-face voice and rebuffs him. Excuses offered include the fact she's no longer 21 and it's early in the morning. Matt harrumphs (hopefully not a metaphor) and Lil excuses herself to the bathroom.

Some discussion a bit later on as to plans for the day, Tiger bitching and whining about Lil's mood, Lil PrincessDi-s that she's sorry, isn't really up for anything etc. They agree on shopping in town to buy souvenirs for myriad posh (ie not married in via a Blacksmith) Archers. All listeners twitch slightly in anticipation of convincing 'we're actually on location as it's Summertime in Amex' accents.

But no! We find out that Lil has bought Peggy some Pomegranate stuff (she hopes Peggy likes it, which lets face it is unlikely unless it can be used to poison Kiera, feed to the cats or bake into some scones) and Jennifer will just have to settle for 'a purse' as Lil has lost her shopping Mojo.

Tiger wheedles that he wants to buy Lil some jewellery and we finally get our Borsetshire Casting Central (TM) accent from a shopkeeper - he could be supposed to be Montenegrin, he might have been already cast when this plot was supposed to take place in Turkey or he may in fact just have learned his accent whilst watching that Doctor Who episode set on a Russian Submarine...it's really very hard to tell. Matt proves he's losing his business mojo by getting a mere 50 Euro off a 600 Euro necklace. Shopkeepervich throws in some extra irony for free about how the necklace must be bought so Matt can keep his beautiful wife

Cut to plot exposition scene set in a church just in case anyone happens to listen to Amex and not the Archers (FFS!). Lil is interrupted by a British lady (who I swear sounds like Anita Dobson when she's reminding us she's not just Aaaaaaannnnnnggggge and is a proper fox-bothering actress and everything - sadly however it isn't Celia turning all Single White Female). British Lady has a Montenegrin son-in-law and SHOCK! Horror! Montenegrin grand-children. Lil cranks up the PrincessDi-ing and explains that she lost someone very close to her who she loved, can't see how she can go on, can't talk about it etc.

Matt is cross and phoning Lil as he can't find her but gets voicemail...Lil eventually appears from the church and Matt clocks she's been crying. He suggests lunch, Lil declines and Matt strops off.

Cut back to the hotel with very little time left of the pod-cast so Matt is forced to engineer The. Big. Denoument. They bicker about why Lil is unhappy, she plays the 'I stuck by you when you were in jail card' and PD's about how it's all about Matt never about her....Matt keeps manouevering and asks her to just be honest with him....Lil tries to be dodge it but there's no escaping it, with mere seconds to go Matt drops the bombshell: he knows she was screwing his brother, he knows she was seeing Paul!

jingley jangley music and that's it until Thursday folks!

It's called a Good Read very enjoyable!

I like A Good Read, I always intend to read books mentioned but never do!

Me too! WELL what about brenda and Dimitri then?still think he's on the side of the angels?? Or has he just kept her away from the diddling of Matt which no one could see coming DUH!!

@PseudoBadger

50 Shades of Brenda....

ROAR

Ooh I did enjoy that! Well done Lillian!! Matt is a prize twat and has been skirting along the side of the law for long enough. Serves him right for being such a ginormous div (I still think the storyline is massively unrealistic though, Matt just wouldn't be that stupid!). Plus his voice is somehow even more grating in Russia.

I hope Dmitri is a goody, Brenda needs a good seeing to bit of romance after the endless lectures on sausages.

I hope if Dimitri isn't good, Brenda sees it all as some fun and doesn't go all whiney.

I hope so too at Brenda deserves some fun after Years of Tom.

Also cant Cope with whining on Amex and with cathy back in archers.

She's already txting friends in Ambridge that she's in LURRRVE I forecast a great deal of meltdown if when- it goes tits up

Indeed which it will. Also want to know what will happen to Matt.

Yup despite complaining i'm rather enjoying the Russian storyline

Am I very lightweight?

No I like it too

Stop press! BBC ditches Ambridge for James Bond /Jason Bourne schocker.

Well that (Thursday) was nothing like The Archers. Great fun though, and a teeny bit harrowing. Much, much better than the previous pathetic attempts at an alternative Ambridge-on-tour. Although as ever it will be wrapped up all too speedily.

So I admit I enjoyed it. But I still don't want TA on 4 Extra.

Oh blimey... unless someone does a proper recap soon I'm going to have to dig out the headphones and listen on the computer which I hate doing...

Give us a precis something Listen Again is not allowing me to do so. Pretty please....

Brenda been holed up in love shack with lover boy dimitri.Meanwhile vitally did a runner with matts cash so Matt found himself checked out with no cash (as Lilian stopped cards) and Brenda AWOL. He then got pissed and arrested.
Brenda lover boy seems to be in league with tatiana (lovely girl from art gallery) who bailed Matt from jail.

Tatiana now trying to help Matt find the missing vitaly with dimitri. They bail Matt and take him to see Brenda

Vitaly dad (who is chairman of the company Matt was trying to deal with) turned up at end to tell Matt and Brenda that vitaly is in jail...

Listened to Archers Extra for first time today. What a mistake - must be one of the worst productions ever put out by the BBC. I shall stick to this thread in future!

What??? All that in one episode blimey Thanks gigondas BUT i did forecast matt would end in a Russian jail !!! Shame he's effing got out!!

He was only in it for about an hour...

Not long enough THAT might of made him clean up his murky business ethics, a spell in Russian clink! The English one obviously didn't

Ok - recaps a gogo, am hoping to get at least one more up today, if not two....

Tuesday 16 July finds the listener agog to see why Copenhagen was so important, unfortunately it seems to be a bit of a delicious dill dressed red herring as we start off with the shock news that Matt is the new Doctor Who...oh wait, no it's just some shitty sound effect designed to convey that they are at the airport in St Petersburg. Brenda has arrived and Matt is meeting her with BFFV's driver.

Brenda is all wide-eyed at the luxury of this but aghast that she now has to go straight to work. Matt wants to create the impression it's just run of the mill business for them, he will do the talking and Bren needs to just stand there and look pretty. Bren is not impressed.

Brenda tries to wheedle info out of Matt about what's going on with Lils; Matt isn't happy that Lil knows he's in Russia and promises to give Lil a call but he has more important things to worry about at the moment.

At the Lubyanka (aka BFFVs offices). Matt innuendos that Bren is familiar with all his affairs. BFFV lowers the lights and starts off the presentation of 'Kensington Gardens' . BFFV has 'acquired' the freehold for the land so form your own conclusions there as to how he comes to own it. Based on the sniggering from Matt and Bren it's clearly based on England at Epcot, houses called things like Sandringham and Highgrove and a lovely High Street. They are going to sell the houses off plan as it's nice to get the money up front.

Bren excuses herself to create a plot device and use the loo whilst she's at it. She gets lost on the way back and is shown the way back to the office by an avuncular sounding Russian chap (a bit like if Oliver wereputting on a subtle Slavic accent). Bren says she's meeting Vitaly and the chap reveals he also works there. He shows Bren into the room and then there is much Russian chat between chap and BFFV - the only words I get are 'Matt Crawford' 'Kensignton Gardens' and 'papa' so clearly the avuncular chap is Vladdy! BFFV is once again a bit rattled by having to talk to Vladdy.

Matt and BFFV are off to a sauna to talk business and I now need brain bleach as the scriptwriters feel the need to let us know that they are both naked. Bren is spared this and has been dropped off at the hotel.

Business schmoozy chit chat and BFFV gets to his new proposition 'separate from Kensington Gardens'. BFFV wants Matt to invest in another project - he wants to buy some land outside the city to build an electronics factory, he promises returns of 75% and says it's mutual back scratching, Matt invests in this project and he can work with Matt in the UK (presumably now Iceland is bankrupt and no longer available for laundering of dodgy Russian money). They want to sign the deal this week so Matt will need the money by Thursday, conveniently co-inciding with the next installment.

Matt wakes Bren up back at the hotel and regales her with details of the new deal 'the biggest he's ever done'. Bren is sceptical and shocked to discover Matt has a secret stash of cash - apparently when he was getting divorced from Yvette he hid it off shore (so it wasn't caught by the Fraud Squad) and he can't access it from the UK but he'll be able to get to it from Russia. Lils doesn't know about the money.

Bren comments that he's planning on doing this all without Lillian and observes he's planning on not coming back. Matt says 'looks that way' and the jingle jangles of forshadowing see us out until next time!

*Round of applause! I think Lil does know about the money though.

Yes I was going to say that songbird she knows ALL about it because she said they were going to 'share' it and it annoyed her that he's using it.

It'll annoy her even more when she discovers it's been pissed away!!!

Yes well, he doesn't have any claim to the rest of 'their' money does he? Amside is Lillian's business in name isn't it? She's bugging the hell out of me at the moment but I just find his character utterly repellent and I hope he gets what's coming to him.