FESH spa and creche: The Ultimate Destination for survivors of the Palace and Deli: Prologue

[CurlyCasperBaggedABairn]

Welcome weary travellers. It's been a long road, but you made it! Now, hard as it might be, leave your ESH spawn at the creche and step into the spa - where we have every treatment available to soothe your Amityville Horror undercarriage, ravaged raspberries and worn out wits. And - wait for it - we've got the bar back. And it's all-inclusive

So, what are you waiting for? Grab a glass, lower yourself into the jacuzzi and lets get chatting. We are Forever ESH!

P.S Children never cry here...

refund done :)

Tummy time helps massage their digestive tract as they shuffle around. Rastus loves being on his tum for that reason (good job he's strong as an ox).Also carry him round in the 'tiger in the tree' position which doe the same thing

Tiger in the tree? Do you mean over the shoulder? @ tiger - when Comma does the star thing (you know, when asleep he throws his arms out in shock at something) that he's scared a tiger is coming to get him.

no, sling him over yr arm. will post pic on other place in a bit

Pic posted.

carrots Well done with the EBM - "liberating" indeed!

cossie Well, as another poster pointed out "never carry more than you can eat" and you should be OK.

Today is my 6 week mark - can't believe it's been 6 weeks as it's passed in a total blur. Am planning to get back in the saddle next week yaaaaay! Can finally start getting her fit again and ridden the way she should be ridden! silver How's it going with your girl?

"tummy time massages digestive tract"? Also massages my inner ear as he screams to buggery. The Bear does not like tummy time - even early in the morning before he's all gassed up.

The grandma & great-grandma came around today at 6. I handed over the Bear and went to sleep until 10:30! Little bugger had me up from 2 am and I was awake until 6pm. "Sleep when the baby does?" - how's that work then? Horse will present itself to farrier? Shopping will do itself? Dogs will walk themselves eh?

I'm back to the doctor tomorrow with a thrush baybee. No symptoms in my nips but of course it must be there. :(

skit / rots All this liberating talk of expressing is inspiring me. I think it must be time to start. I'll dust off the pump and give it a go. I need to soon anyway as I've a few social plans coming up and it would be nice to know Clyde is actually willing to take a bottle before I'm in a nice frock and trying to get out the door.

rots I actually went to the hairdresser twice this week. First time I had a cut and colour. I wasn't sure it could be done, but roped in MrP to assist. He wheeled Clyde around the shops until I texted him to say come on over once the foils were in. I then gave Clyde a feed in the salon under the cape while waiting for the colour to take, and MrP took him off again until I was finished. It worked surprisingly well. I went back a couple of days later to get them to take a bit more off (I'm a fussy cow) and that time Clyde just lay in his pram next to me. It helps that my hairdresser has a 6 mth old herself so they were loving having him there.

Talking of liberating fanny, I'm off to the coast with the horse & the stable girls in October. No baby, no jailbait - just me & me horsicle! Galloping along the beach wahey! I've decided to get back in the saddle next week.

Operation "fit in to my winter wardrobe" commences properly on Monday. I will not currently fit in to anything if I don't take control of the situation. I'm also going to swing by jailbait's gym and see if I can sign up. Do a couple of bodypump classes a week if nothing else.

Ski - gym? Are you nuts? Very impressive, madam. All this talk of activity is making me want a nice sit down and a biscuit.

Re: child abuse - my Mum tripped on the stairs and grabbed the banister to save herself, launching her tiny newborn (me) through the air and down to the ground floor. (What do you mean, that explains it?)

Miss Piggy: "Never Eat More Than You Can Lift". A life mantra of mine.

Gawd I really should do some work - I have Friday Feeling badly this morning.

I don't think it's impressive at all - I like the gym and I don't want to buy a new wardrobe. Plus , whilst I love Bear to bits - there's more to life than cuddling a baybee. Not quite ready to martyr myself just yet.

VAG Have you any siblings? I'm wondering if she managed a juggling act.

Am back from the doctor. Fucking plank of mummy brain. My usual doctor is on holiday, so I had to get an appointment at a different one. Went storming off with the pram in front of me - got to the square I thought it was on - realised it was not the place at all. Phoned the receptionist and told her I was "lost". Race off in opposite direction. Very nice doctor, about 15 years old - told me she was finishing her first year as a GP - which actually is very impressive for a 15 year old. Just as we were leaving the surgery he started yelling, so didn't go home via the chemist. Back, blistered and sweaty betty.

It's 1pm - G&T time right? I mentioned to jailbait's mum & gran that I can see how SAHMs and anyone not working could quite easily hit the bottle and you'd just sit there waiting for 11am. His gran nodded sagely and said "aye pet, aye". haha

Blisters due to having worn lesbotastic footwear since Feb. :( Now back in attractive shoes and muggy weather turning feet to mush. Be warned!

lol just back from 6 week check. 11lbs 12oz. Fat little fucker

Yay cunty! So someone else is in the fatty club with Clyde. I've just been out to buy him some size 6-9 mth vests as he keeps bursting the poppers on the 3-6 mth ones.

ski I am now trapped in lesbotastic footwear for the reasons you describe. Last time I wore fancy shoes I had to mentally calculate how many steps from car to restaurant door, and when walking concentrate on looking like I was confident and sexy rather than thinking, shit my feet! I think my feet have become permanently wider due to overuse of slippers.

Physio checked me over today and gave me the all clear to restart my pilates classes. I'm so glad I can be active again as I've a tonne of weight to lose (not literally - don't look at me like that). I'm also motivated by ski's reasons. I can't afford new clothes and have to somehow squeeze back into my existing wardrobe.

ski My girl is a boy! Currently got three legs - see my post on the Deli.

Am so jealous of the back in the saddle part, not to mention the beach!!!!

Mutt is driving me crazy, sitting in front of me. Looking at me forlornly. Who knows what she wants.

Him Indoors says I am in an argumentative mood. No I am not. We did end up laughting about it. After my melt down yesterday, he bought me home an eclair and perfume. Such a good boy!

at jailbait's mum and gran ski. I hope I have half your motivation come November. Mr Moo has asked tentatively if I'm going to start the gym training again post birth (in a terribly sensitive way obviously) and I have to say am looking forward to getting my old body back at some stage, particularly as I don't seem to be doing much now.

As for lesbotastic footwear I seem to LIVE in my fitflops god help me.

Doglet has had the trainer Winkie Spiers round tonight - she is ace. I will have him jumping through hoops of fire in no time.

Hope all the PESH babies are lovely this evening. Loving your little chubster cunty. Ooooh I can't wait to see those little chubby legs inside my tum tum!!!!

rots you are waking your baby up according to the other place... pray tell us more?

I haz the droid! I'm actually pretty happy with this because it means (I'd hope!) that I don't have an underlying hormonal problem. Gynae on wednesday said it should return 6-8 weeks after birth on combined feeding providing nothing untoward - 6 weeks and 1 day is OK innit!? Believe me, it's been a looooooong time since I've celebrated the droid. The previous 12 times it was with a heavy heart.

The visitors are getting on our tits coz we is ungrateful. :( We live within an hour of some really beautiful interesting cities. All they want to do is sit in the flat looking at the baybee which is all well and good and I understand they've travelled some distance... but 12 hours a day is too much - especially as jailbait gets up at 4am to go to work. His mum walked out in tears last night and we're trying to get them to go and visit Maastricht today but they can't cope with the "foreign" trains. Gah. Don't want to go in to some pathetic MIL rant because I know some people don't "travel" well but this is The Netherlands, not Delhi. Trains aren't that complicated. You know, the doors open and you put your arse on a seat. They also had troubles at the supermarket because they didn't know what anything was because the labels were foreign. Bread, milk & eggs are the masters of disguise!

Silver If you can't get a farrier out, take off the opposite shoe and keep the foot clean - lots of hosing (water is very good for hooves) and she'll survive a couple of weeks until your trusted guy is back. It's dead easy to take the shoe off, just chip the nails "out" if that makes sense, clip off the "hook" and then you can pull the shoe off.

Any news from iggy or curly? Clearly girls are "more work" and so the PESHes should strive to continue laying boys.

Yay for the droid Ski! Soz about the visitors, that would indeed drive me nuts, but sadly I can imagine my Ma being the same.

Can't believe all the gorgeous little FESH baybees are not so little any more... how quickly time goes.

Oh yeah, and having been told my bump was 'too small', I am now being told I am big. Sometimes I really wish people could keep their opinions to themselves.

Oh gosh... the deathly silence! :(

We had a good day yesterday, managed to get the visitors away on a day trip and although they came around for dinner they fucked off at 8:45 - yes, I'm a bloody misery. I don't like my "territory" invaded!

Yesterday we experienced Bear's first real smiles! :) :) :) Lovely to see and he's now following us around the room with his head and spending more time awake so is getting more "fun".

I've now conquered the washable nappies and am on a roll there. Houseguests cannot cope with these, only pampers... makes me wonder what they used in their day.

polly I don't know what to say really - you've been there before, you know everyone and their dog has a vocal opinion - most of them annoying and superfluous to requirements! Doesn't matter how big or small your tummy is!

It was 25 degrees here yesterday and I nipped out to the cashpoint (5 minute walk) with the harness on... I was forcibly given a hat to put on him in case he got cold.

just came on to mention the real smiles at this end ski! she saved them for visiting grandparents - who are why we've been offline. been having a ball with my mum and dad. they leave today, so back later...

Feshies, did you actually wash baybee clothes before laying baybee? wondering if I shoudl bother........

I did... and towels & sheets. Anything which comes out of plastic wrapping honks of chemicals. :(

I have done all the sheets and towels, I'll do the clothes too - if only to see them on the line looking cute

Just popping in to put a towel on my sunbed, in the manner of a German tourist. Ie far too early but I'm doing it nonetheless.

Anyway. Happy term-day to me! Officially only 3 weeks to go to my due date. It could be only 2 and a half weeks though if you go by my scan, or 3 and a half weeks if you go by the date the hospital have (saves me from the panic of 'oh, no! You are overdue and we can't induce you! Lie down while we get the scalpel out....' ) Finally, going on family past performance - could still 5 whole fucking weeks Wah!

No droid here, but I am EBF and as I recall it took longer last time.

ski Glad you had a better day with your guests. How much longer to go? One thing we did to make the grocery shopping a bit easier for my parents is to write on the list where to find things in the supermarket. But I know some people are simply convinced things like this are just too hard. One of the reasons we didn't invite MIL is because she is very much of the 'sit around the house all day, I'm too scared to travel anywhere' type of person. My sympathies.

polly Regard that experience as warm up practice for the multitude of pointless comments you are going to face from here on. Nod, smile, ignore, forget.

Who is using slings? I tried the Wilkinet for the first time yesterday and really liked it. But I think Clyde got a bit hot or was otherwise unhappy and squirmy for some reason until he finally fell asleep. It wasn't the instant calming device that many seem to claim. How is everyone else getting on? I didn't use slings with Bonnie as my pelvis recovery was slower, so I'm new to this.

Really looking forward to the new FESHes becoming official!

fanny But she's a native English speaker right? 2 more days... and we're off to the cinema this afternoon and tomorrow I'm going to hide out at the stables and draw it out by giving my tack a long overdue clean. :)

I do wish everyone would just fuck off though. My mum is a cow but to give her her dues, when she was over she only "hung" around the house for a couple of hours at a time. Very good at amusing herself.