A Viscous Attack #4

[Whosthetabbynow]

Here we are on the fourth instalment of crazy misspellings, misuse of words and all the other topsy-turvy attempts at literacy from the illiterate.
Post your observations. Lady’s the flaw is youre’s…

Running across the screen on Good Morning Britain last week was 'Inflation has rose by 3.5%'.

😱

Why is nobody checking these things?

That is a shocker. I used to work in television graphics and, especially for live news broadcasts, the journalists or P.A.s would dump their copy and hotfoot straight back to the newsroom; it was rare for anything to be checked, and no time for a run-through in the gallery (or it wasn’t prioritised). We had to do Welsh captions as well!
I must say, I made some corkers in my time; once mis-spelled Neil Kinnock’s name (got brain freeze about the ‘i before e except after c’ rule)!

That's not a typo or a spelling error, though, it's terrible grammar.

Fatigue is the one side effect that can flaw me.

Just been reading about a partner’s daughter who apparently “can be a whinny kid”. Maybe she’s just a little hoarse…? (Ok, I’ll get my coat.)

Also spelled as 'rains' on the same thread. I was reading in increasing disbelief, waiting for 'reyns' to start cropping up - every other possible spelling having been covered.

i’m nit at all ... scooped the guts out and purred it ...

Yes that’s true. The culprit definitely won’t be cringing about it forty years later! 😂

Saw a reference to ‘a cliqued old man’ on a thread.
A more exclusive type of cliche?

Curious.

Me too.

Fun wasn’t it

Just read a thread where the OP describes her husband as being like "Victor Mildew". Another poster has then repeated this spelling in a subsequent post.

It was very common in the part of Essex where I spent my primary school years. 'Goed' and 'wented' were also popular, as I recall.

Maybe he’s been left to get damp?

I've heard it used by young children quite a lot (in London).

"The estate agent is dammed if they do and dammed if they don’t." Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn about the water shortage in Atlanta.

... it was he’s dads house.

On the Guardian today: “the president’s party typically fairs poorly in midterm elections“

I spotted that 😫.

Par for the course for the Grauniad. Years ago (well before autocorrect could be blamed) for some reason I read an article in its motoring section; it used “break” instead of “brake” throughout.

It does make logical sense when you're young and getting to grips with a language: ring rang rung; sing sang sung; bring brang brung. Entirely sensible.

Sensible is not the correct word there.

Musk of pony cheese anyone?