I am scared i have just been sent a mysterious parcel which i open and there are holes punched inthe lid as if to let something breathe wtf is it?????

[FrannyandZooey]

help

oooh you haven't opened yet

I reckon it is camembert

no

it smells kind of damp
or herby

drugs

postcode is np
where is that? i very vaguely recognise handwriting

yummy from a snake's POV of course!

have you opened it yet?

Who are they from?

NP - South wales - mine is NP4 - Pontypool

CHEESE or FLOWERS

that's what I reckon

you are the kind of person to receive cheese

Be brave!

Stamp on it (that'll pacify anyything inside ), then open with gay abandon!

no i haven't! am honestly a bit scared
trying to work out what smell is
it doesn't rattle

could it be a casserole?

Message withdrawn

it doesn't smell like cheese
i don't much like cheese actually - except ordinary sort

south wales? ooh god

ermmmmm

i just fancy a casserole

do you know anyone from wales??

fucking funny smelling casserole

who lives in wales? filly?

cheescake

crabs

hahaha

yes perhaps it is a LIVE CRAB

wouldn't that just be HYSTERICAL

open it and watch him clippy-clop over your dining room table

fillyjonk have you sent me some snails????

what does it smell like?

Is it a plant like a bay tree or something. It will be all wrapped and won't rattle.
I am gagging to know what it is now.

Message withdrawn

omg a crab
that is horrible too
why would anyone send me something alive unless they hate me? oh god someone hates me and they have sent me a parcel