Son being told he smells

[TennisBallx]

My son comes home from school most days telling me children tell him he smells, he showers every single morning, clean uniform every morning, sprays deodorant/anti persistent, aftershave, body sprays, brushes teeth etc but he still tells me they say he smells, what is going on?? It’s making him super paranoid and he’s spending ages in the shower in the morning (making all my hot water run out) making himself late for school, spraying deodorant on himself for ages including his hair?! His bag?? Hes now being late for school as it’s taking so much time. Are they just being mean I don’t know what’s going? He doesn’t smell to me

Bullies like cause and effect, this is obviously getting to your son, and he's probably upping the sprays, so they know they're getting to him.

Good advice to have a stranger do a sniff test! I could smell my youngest when he swerved the deodorant, or shower tho. Its probably bullying, sorry.

It could be this. Too much lynx it makes you cough and additional products on top of that.
I’d suggest a decent deodorant (not lynx) and try just that

I'm pretty much sure that he doesn't smell bad at all. Or at least his smell is on a par with everybody else's aroma. Let's face it, we all smell of something.

The rude comments about his surname give it away, for me.

You haven't said anything about your son otherwise. Is he shy? Very academic? Not so academic? Have you moved from a different area? Does he have a slightly different accent?

Maybe he's going through puberty a bit earlier than most of his peers?

Who knows? Children can be such herd animals at that age.

Does he have another hobby or sport outside of school where he mixes with a different set of people?

So horrible. "He smells!" is just the easiest comment to be made by a stupid gang.

Does he use bar soap to wash -shower gel can be pretty useless at that age ( or any age to be fair). A good old bar of soap makes so much difference.

Imagine getting the phone call to be recruited for this task!😂"Please could you come round and smell DS in case I have gone nose blind?"👃

Not a bad idea though. I think sometimes these things become a game OP. Maybe one day he was faintly whiffy after games or similar, so it becomes a silly trope to keep saying it.

Your poor DS and if your family bloodhound-person gives him the all-clear, I'd be treating it as bullying.

How are you sweating directly on to your rucksack?

The straps go under my arms. Sometimes they get wedged under my armpits which for me is really sweaty in the heat.

Not just on clothes, but also coming out of pores, which means you can't wash it away.
It could also be garlic.

Yes, bar soap all the way. And toothpaste needs rinsing off even if they tell you not to!

maybe kids are complaining he smells overpoweringly of lynx...

Is it the Lynx? My son stopped using it at about 14 and I could've cried with joy. He uses Sure now - roll on not spray. Maybe try that with him?

Yes, this.

He might smell of powerful aftershave but that's about it. School needs to address this.

You shouldn't rinse toothpaste!

Don’t rinse toothpaste, you might as well not bother using it if you do that. You’ve just washed off all the fluoride. Toothpaste doesn’t smell

He must use Anti perspirant NOT deodorant. And when he washes his armpit a bar of soap works much better than shower gel at getting rid smells and residue of anti perspirant etc

I know, but it can cause bad breath when not rinsed.

I think in this situation I'd not rinse at night.

I always found after half an hour it got a bit stinky, so I now rinse when heading out the door and I've never had fillings, so for a few months it should be ok.

@TennisBallx
It's a way to bully him
Kids can be nasty and if they try/say something random and it sticks
Then they run with it
Tell the school because it may escalate
School near where I used to live
Bleach was chucked at someone
"Because they stank"

Washing too much can be bad for your skin and increase the smell. Make sure he isn't having overly hot showers. He probably doesn't need to wash his hair everyday.

Consider encouraging him to swap to deodorants that are less scented than Lynx and to try out anti perspirants with aluminium (Driclor, Vichy are some brands) some nights of the week.

Have a read of resources for people who sweat excessively - there are ideas you can steal like picking leather shoes (which are breathable because leather is a natural fibre) if you're not vegan, cork insoles for summer sandals, disposable armpit pads for shirts etc.

Brushing his teeth is important. Avoiding food with strong smells for breakfast/ in a packed lunch is worth doing if practicable.

If it's bullying based on no actual smell the risk is one of his (unconscious) reactions will be to make more sweat and smell more so it becomes self fulfilling.

There was a child in my class at school who smelled of faecal matter. And he genuinely did. He had a terrible time of it in school. When he grew up he lost the smell. I don't know if he picked it up at home or he sorted out whatever was causing it.

There's no point saying the kids are cruel and to ignore them. Your son can't ignore them. Best get an outside opinion. Go to the doctors and make sure he doesn't mask his usual smell before he goes. There may be a medical reason for it.

Hiya sorry to hear this!

I would recommend having a verbal conversation with his form tutor and head of year/pastoral team. They should be able to pick up on any issues immediately especially with your sons confidence and if he has been running late recently/ issues with friendship group and or if they have picked up on the taunts/if there is an actual smell issue. Its their job to really be a parents first port of call.

These conversations are difficult at times god knows I had to call a mother once (after weeks of speaking to the pupil) to get her year 9 son to trim and clean his fingernails because they were black with dirt and extremely long.

Try to find out from your son if the pupils saying this are in his classes/Form group or just in his year/about the school.

If they are bullying him the tutor/head of year/pastoral team can send out round robins to pick up on any behaviour in lessons /playground and take a plan of action get seating plans changed etc.

Do you empty your washing machine as soon as it finishes. Leaving damp washing in the machine and drying indoors can create a horrible smell on clothing.

If is personal hygiene is good, including teeth and hair and he changed his clothing regularly and neither his body or his clothes smell, then it's either bullying at school, or maybe he has a medical problem that is made worse by anxiety. Google medical problems with body odour symptoms and make a doctor's appt if he is getting distressed by the remarks to get him checked out.

My son has a friend, lovely kid, who absolutely fucking stinks. I mean when he visits my house, I have to air it out. If he's in my car, I'm gagging.
No one at home notices the smell. Apparently people can be nose blind to even the most diabolical smells.

When my son himself started to get a little funky, I washed his pits in vinegar and used a bio detergent on his clothes. Got on top of the stink as it became an issue then moved him from body sprays to a roll on antiperspirant. Smells fresh as a daisy now.

On the other hand are they saying specifically that he smells of BO? Or is it the Lynx he stinks of?

Is it his blazer that smells? Have a good sniff of the area that sits under his arms.
if the washing is dried indoors is it dried quickly and not smelling musty?

get him to wash oits, buts and feet with bar soap rather than shower gel and use anti perspirant rather than deodorant or lynx (that stuff stinks)
if he’s genuinely clean and the clothes/house doesn’t smell he’s being bullied and the school need to deal with it

it’s a good idea to get someone from outside the house to sniff about. Nose blindness really is a thing

My son also had this, other kids saying his breath smelled. Turned out he had enlarged adenoids and was a mouth breather, after an operation his breath was back to
normal.

What is the school blazer fabric? Polyester holds on to sebum which leads to odour rebloom. It become more of an issue sometimes as one hits puberty. You may need to soak clothing in warm water with biological detergent specifically one that has lipase and good surfactants.
Look up articles on spa day soak.

A friend removed oiliness from sheets using Waitrose bio colour powder. Ariel bio also works well. Citric acid in the rinse instead of softener will remove the left over detergent. Personally for me without this ariel can smell too strong.