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Parenting

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What word do your children use for female genitals?

386 replies

frannyf · 09/09/2005 19:40

Apologies if this has been asked before, but this is becoming an urgent issue in our household. Ds is 2.5 and has just started asking "Where is your willy, Mummy?" I told him women and girls don't have willies...and then froze.

I don't want him to think that girls just have an empty area where a willy should be, I want him to realise we have our own special bits, but I cannot settle on a word I feel comfortable with.

"Vagina" is so medical. "Flower" and all those sort of words seem too cutesie. I feel "fanny" is the right equivalent to "willy", and did try it, but I just cringed saying it to ds and felt even worse when he repeated it. I obviously did not sound convincing anyway as he has reverted to calling it a bottom. Help! Sorry if I have rejected your family's choice of name by the way, I don't think any of them are wrong or anything, just don't feel right saying them myself. Am I hopelessly uptight?

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 09/09/2005 19:41

A lulu.

codsicle · 09/09/2005 19:41

yes it has!

SPARKLER1 · 09/09/2005 19:42

we just say bits

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sansouci · 09/09/2005 19:42

girls have their willies built in; much more sensible. we just call the whole works "bottom".

myturn · 09/09/2005 19:43

Bits. (No imagination)

Cooperoo · 09/09/2005 19:45

Hmmm, have just been trying to decide this myself. I am trying out nunu at the moment but really not sure. Mine was always a front bottom when I was small but I am not sure I like that either but at the moment dd1 has had ladies bits which CANNOT go on.

ickleharpsichordcarrier · 09/09/2005 19:45

vulva. fringe benefit - seeing MIL's face when dd says "grandma, I've got a lovely vulva!"

Cooperoo · 09/09/2005 19:46

Oh x-posted with bits users. It's not that bad then?? I thought I would be shot down for that one!! . Maybe I will stick with it. It seems the easiest for me to remember lol.

Lonelymumsicle · 09/09/2005 19:46

No words whatsoever. That part of the anatomy has never been discussed and I can't see the need for that to change until they are much older when the correct terminology will be adopted.

ickleharpsichordcarrier · 09/09/2005 19:47

perhaps different though because she's a girl (obv...) and I want her to know the proper word in case she needs to tell me it hurts or whatever.

frannyf · 09/09/2005 19:47

Well if nobody minds I appreciate the recap.

Am going to put ds to bed but will read all when I get back.

I don't think he will be fobbed off with "bottom" - he is getting very specific these days. Wanted to know the names of what he perceived as about 10 different parts of my breast yesterday! Maybe I should just wear clothes more often??

OP posts:
Lonelymumsicle · 09/09/2005 19:50

Ah now my children called breast boobs after I caouldn't face referring to them as breasts (which I see as a sexual term) when they were younger. The other day ds2 (7) confidently announced that dd would one day have boobs at which I realised how bad that sounded and quickly corrected him to breasts - but I do hate hearing that word on a child's lips.

frannyf · 09/09/2005 19:50

Just saw your post lonely mum - do you mean that your children have never asked what their genitalia are called? I am amazed!

OP posts:
myturn · 09/09/2005 19:51

Mine haven't frannyf, and the eldest is 12!

frannyf · 09/09/2005 19:53

Blimey! How come I get the nosey child who sits pointing and saying "and what's this bit called? And what's this bit called?" ad infinitum. When I said I didn't know he started making up names - "These are the bumpies. This is the nobble." ROFL

OP posts:
Lonelymumsicle · 09/09/2005 20:01

Absolutely never. I have three boys and one girl and they all know that the male genital is called a willy, and the older three know that women and girls don't have a willy, but none of them have felt the need to ask what women have instead. Why should they assume women have anything instead? I know I didn't when I was their age!

spidermama · 09/09/2005 20:03

I say 'Fanny'. I used to call it a 'fanny' as a little girl. I think euphemisms ('front bottom', 'twinkie' etc) just store up problems for later life. 'Vagina' is too medical, too grown up, and literally translated means 'sheath' so not very appropriate or empowering.

The problem is with society. We haven't worked out an acceptable and united terminology for womenb's bits. I mean, the swear word generally regarded as the worst means 'fanny' so what's that about?

Indicative of a deeper malaise and discomfort about women if you ask me. But then I have had two rather large glasses of wine already this evening. (Hjic)

spidermama · 09/09/2005 20:05

I quite like 'yoni'. I think it's Sanscrit or something. I considered using it but felt a bit pretentious. For me 'fanny' was the only way forward. (MIL winces at it though).

Micku5 · 09/09/2005 20:12

I have a dd and we use nunu (creole word that my mum always used) as we were growing up and I do now.

ickleharpsichordcarrier · 09/09/2005 20:15

I'm sure I'm not the first person to say this on here (today even...) but it is pretty inaccurate to say vagina, because that's not what you're looking at.
you're right spidermama it is a bit Odd and Telling that female genitals are so unmentionable. (But then I have had a glass of wine too.) If we tell our children what every other part of the body is called (without them asking) then why leave out that part? what kind of message does that send?
(can't believe I am posting about vulvas while I still have this ludicrous name )

anniebear · 09/09/2005 20:16

Isn't it funny how boys have a willy, widgie, tail, winkie.....but when it comes to Girls it is so hard to decide what to call it!!

I hear so many Mums talk about this, we are all the same!!

We were brought up to call it our privates!!

SleepySuzy · 09/09/2005 20:18

It's a tuppence!!

anniebear · 09/09/2005 20:18

Those who never called it anything, what did you tel your DD to wipe when she started going on the toilet?!!

Not keen on fanny myself, sounds a bit rude!!lol

would be v embarassed if my DD said that one out loud!!!!!!!lol

motherinferior · 09/09/2005 20:18

Fanny.

Which did lead to DD1 asking loudly a year ago 'what's that on your fanny?' to which the answer was 'it's my willy, thank you' from her slightly embarrassed dad.

starlover · 09/09/2005 20:20

IHC is right. vagina is not the correct term. it's vulva.