If oyu name si Linda you are an admin perosn at a hospital

[coddy]

if your name is MIke you are somehing techy

Idris finds Bogden a bit "intense" and is shocked at his poor grasp of medieval history and folklore ...... but he's useful at chipping in on the petrol money and can get a tent up on a windy night

Janet wears pop socks under her skirt and they cut into her large calves.

Claude is a slightly effiminate French Canadian, who calls everyone dahling and throws themed dinner parties.

He has also painted his sitting room deep red.

Yeahinaminute -you know Bogden so well!

Sadly Vulgar - I do !!!

Claude would love his home to be featured in an interiors mag.

sadly, it is too naff.

Claude is also overly fond of "ornate" mirrors .... he thinks it adds depth to his small studio flat

Vanessa is a middle aged actress who now has a stall selling French Brocante at the local antiques market.

PMSL

MY PARENTS ARE KAREN AND ROBERT!!

(BELOW IT SAYS KAREN IS MARRIED TO ROBERT!)

LOL!

Vanessa could sell Claude an ornate mirror but she has painted all hers white and lightly distressed them with sandpaper.

Claude would prefer a gold one.

and Vanessa's prices are simply outrageous.

Jayne is nearly thirty. She is married to a husband she is bored with (who is actually very nice and deserves better than Jayne) and she goes through life arranging one "project" after another. Her biggest and best was to get her marriage blessed which she arranged in manner of a B list celeb wanting to bag a double page spread towards the back of OK magazine.

Every couple of years she has another baby.

She has terrible BO but nobody knows quite how to tell her.

Gaynor " Just call me Gaye dear ... ha ha ... no, not like that ... ha ha " helps out on Wednesday's at the old folks luncheon club ..... she serves watery mash " well what with the dentures and all they find it a bit difficult to chew" and forces them to sing jolly songs about "hanging out the washing on the Seigfried Line" and " White Cliffs of soddin' Dover"

The old folk just want to be left alone to shout and fart at each other.

They wish Gaynor would just piss off to Lanzarote or whever it is that she and Dennis bought the time - share.

If you're a playwrite looking for characters, this MUST be the best place to look.

There's enough stuff here for endless productions.

Beverly has been at CSLogistics as long as anyone can remember. She has the answers to all the queries and can run the office single handed for a fortnight whilst Himself is in Greece with the family.

Bev, as she likes to be called, has become the office mother figure. She can remember when Darren - hair gelled delivery driver - dumped Charmain (office assistant) the week before the works Christmas do and she has had to deal with not one but two false pregnancy alarms from girls on the front desk. The drivers give her a cheery wave through the window of a morning and a wink to the new girl on reception. She can't quite figure out why and when they stopped winking at her and became like their mothers. There have been jokes about her ample bosom and she has tried not to mind - but deep down she would like acrylic nails and go to the Kings Head on a Friday night - but she never does - somehome it does not feel right. Despite the bubbly personality and the bold prints, Bev is desperately shy.

At the weekends Bev takes a Tai Chi class and shops in town. She spends time looking after her balcony plants and doing the Puzzler.

Aw, I feel sorry for Bev

Torquil is something in media.

He drives his girlfriends Golf and uses his parents house when they are on holiday.

He cannot understand why his salary does not match the lifestyle he deserves.

Julia is big on committees. She is the head of the PTA.

her best mate and henchwoman is Alicia. She has a lovely little shop selling ''lovely things dahling''

During his teen years, Gavin regularly apeared on Kick Start. He now imports motorbike parts with his mate Scott. They sell them on line for a tidy profit.

Is Julia the one with the four boys at prep school?

ah no, she can't quite afford prep school despite doing rather well out of the divorce from Max

Scott likes Charmain. He sometimes has to talk to her on the phone about parcels and packages that have got lost.

Charmain think Scott sounds quite nice but she couldn't think about going out with someone so dirty

Max had to leave.

He could not stand being controlled. He thought Julia was just becoming to obsessive.

Phillipa wears shirts from TM Lewin and drives a recent-model Polo

Pippa wears rugby shirts covered in horse hair and drives a knackered old Polo

Pip is a spark up at the hospital. He knows the whole place would collapse without him. He keeps two budgies 'for the company' and smokes roll-ups.

Max is now obsessing about Freya. She's a yoga teacher in her late 20s with scandinavian blonde locks. She strides past his 'consultancy' office premises every morning on her way to fetch her chai from Neros.
She is seeing Olivier. a pseudo-french 'writer-musician' (ie plays the bongos) who has actually been unemployed for the past 5 years.

Bev just can't meet the right man. Either married or gay, the ones she falls for.

Clive loves Bev. He works at the gym where Bev works out. She thinks he's gay. He isn't.