40+ Lone parents

[WillIEverBeASizeTen]

I'm 49 and a lone parent (13yo and 20yo) am I in the minority on Mumsnet? It appears alot of the LP's here are a lot younger!

morning

Yes #i can not sleep past 5am even though the dc do.,no matter what time I go to bed

Yes being home is great like never been away , housework and more housework .did take some adjusting to doing things but back to 100mph living now and we tend to be doing most weekends and arms are more muscular now so lol vest tops finally look good only took me 37 years

Oh and some good news Ds3 got nominated to a charity for a wish they do uk trips and he loves monkeys so they are arranding trip and he is having a vip day there so will get up closer to monkeys and they include lunch and entrance and gifts for ds3 especially but also some for dd they did offer gifts for ds2 who is coming but i did tell them not to worry .
And they are sorting transport to .So was crying and laughing same time just waiting to hear the date

ten trouble with dating is the amount of mr wrongs *And glad choir was good ,think making friends once your older is so much harder .I really struggle due to juggling dc needs and then finding out i do not really have anything in common with parents at gates even the older ones .As they are the married ones and with money .I am very much the poor relation .

*Rock looking at forecast looks like your going get a sunny weekend if back in the uk ( looks at window at rail ,ok maybe not today ).hope your catching up with dc and that Bella rulling the roost

joely Hope work is still going ok .Paul not heard anything hope you are doing better .dumps hows your dating going ?

lisa supermum Hope you are having a good weekend .

Right dd and ds3 to Saturday club this morning me for mooch round town as to far to come home .Then tomorrow we are planning zoo again but mostly the playareas and paddling pool there( we get our moneys worth from our annual cards

Hello lovely ladies - Waves to everyone
Well, I have had a good week. Kitchen wall is now completely down, so now have a decent size kitchen/diner area. House is rampant with brick dust - but I just don't care! Had to go to a trade show with work, and I had a fantastic time catching up with lots of people I know from the industry. Had a magnificent evening at the part (and even managed to squeeze in a bit of a snog)!! Went out with my girlie friends last night, and we celebrated the fact that it was 6 months to the day that I found out about XP's affair (Christmas Eve really was such a classic day to do that!!) and he was leaving me and DCs for OW. The celebration was for the fact that what a difference 6 months can make, and how differently I feel now to how I felt on that day. Life is looking up, ladies, and although I am sure that there will still be many times that some real lows come along and knock me off my feet for a bit - at least I know that I have managed to get through something so bloody awful, and that DCs and I are doing fine. Oh, and the sun has just started shining. Hugs to all and hope you are all doing ok. Enjoy the rest of the weekend.
Dumps x

I've been on my own since day 1 - my boy is 13 and I'm 49.

Hola,

Just popping in quickly - been crazy mad since we got here last week and have barely sat down for 5 minutes, let alone have time to post much on here. Told you all that I would bring my weather with me!!!

Enjoy the sun, I'll be back on properly when we get back to Spain at the end of the week.

Hi all just a quick update. Work is going great, children all fine(ish) DS1 still struggling with things, has one more week at work (although his off sick still)- then he hopes to get another job - hope he does soon he needs something to focus on and put his energies into :). Ex choosing to have limited contact with DC's + I really don't care what he an OW get up to. My life really is soo much better now:o
My car now has its sun hat on - roof box -and the sun shone all day here LOL We are off on our holidays on Thursday for 2 weeks. Really ready for a change of scene and to have a holiday we can all enjoy for once :o

*Rock I forgot you had been with Bella to Peppa pig world .Goes of to look for memory pills .Help can anyone remind me where I have put them .

Ds3 has no clue about monkey world or peppa pig world ,dd knows about first but not the second .Hell I did not know that the charity decided to do both his wishes till end of last week .Can not wait to see their faces .They have sorted out hotels for 3 nights , all our meals ,entrance fees and gifts for ds3 and they will give some for dd as well as well as our own zookeeper for teh day at monkey world an d behind the scenes tours .Did offer for ds2 but he said he rather the charity saved money put towards another childs wish .Roll on 24th July I can not wait and will burst with not saying anything .

Home is fab like never been away , eyes up washing breeding pile .Took soem adjustments but we are as busy as ever and I am looking forward to the school holidays .

Hmm you can keep the rain and clouds please weather is pretty perfect not to hot not to cold .Hope you had a fun visit

JOely
Enjoy your holiday ,you deserve it and yes my first holiday just me and the dc was bliss no strain no stress .Glad ds1 is feeling better about it and you sound so postive

Hi llittlemum

I have 4 dc and this is my second time round as a sp .did it with ds1 and ds2 ,then married( hey we are all allowed mistakes) now doing it with the 4dc .

dumps loving how postive you are and with building work going on at same time , hmm saw you slippe din you had a cheeky snog , glad you enjoye dthe celbrations i think we all come to a point where we realise just how much better of we are

Paul
Really hope your ok not seen you posting at all

Ten any more choir pratice ?

I have just joined this site and saw your thread.....I am 48 with a 6 month old !!!! Do I beat you all

wow I am impressed mummy! Awards gold rosette to Mummy...

Hi mummyatlast think would award you rosette but figure sleep may be abetter award .6 mont old!!! looks at her dc and gives a bigsig of relief

Waves at everyone else.am having lazyday here housework done and considering just small nap .

Can not wait for school holidays dd and ds3 are tired and grumpy and need a break now and be so nice not to have the morning rush

*Waves8 to everyone else hope you allok

i'm heading towards 50 as well.

Hi all...

Am sorry I haven't been around here for a while, I get stuck looking at other threads, reply sometimes and then so flippin knackered!

THC I'm so glad all is 'normal' at home, kids are almost finished school and then it'll be Christmas :( how time flies...choir starts in September, can't wait...

Nothing much else is new, just boring, dull and mundane and today has been pissing down and I have a rotten cold...

Off now to look at some juicy gossip...xx

Hello lovely ladies. Has our thread died a death, or were we all just too busy with the DCs and summer holidays? That is my excuse, and I'm sticking to it!

Not much news from here. DC are just gorgeous, and I cannot believe how quickly the holidays have flown by. I would like another 3 weeks for us to do the things that we didn't get round to! All my building work is now finished, and the builder has now finally gone home after 4 months of Monday to Friday lodging! DC were away on holiday with XP last week, so I dusted down the paintbrushes and decorated 3 rooms while they were away. Could barely move at the end of it, due to creaking old bones, aches and pains and general knackeredness!! DC were pleased with their new bedrooms though, so it was all worth while.

Update on XP. He's a git! Sorry, not much of an update - more of an ongoing status........ He has now got round to talking about money, and basically doesn't want to pay anything further for DC, so that he can get a new mortgage with OW. Nice...... He really never fails to disgust!!

No exciting news on dating front. Have been out on a couple of dates, but all very ordinary and frankly disappointing. From September will be concentrating on work, and finally getting on with some stuff that will earn me some money to pay for my new and really rather lovely kitchen.

Hope everyone is ok. Perhaps we can pick it all back up again, now that DC are going back to school?

Dumps x

Emmmm....hello!!!

I have just joined and have contributed a couple of, admittedly self-pitying, posts about how much I hate being on my own.

But what a wonderful thread this seems.

I'm 46, have a 12 yo DD who also has SN, and work f/t so never seem to have much time to myself.

This looks like a lovely place to share.........vent........and celebrate???

Hi everyone

I too have just found this thread and its's good to not feel so alone.

I am 47 with a ds of 13 and a dd of 11. I have been single for 6 years now and have found the summer holidays particularly hard going this year. Everyone else is on long family holidays or so it seems.

Will be revisiting this thread soon

Hey hey Dumps was just thinking about reviving this thread this afternoon!! It is (as you can see) obscenely late here for me (almost half 2....) but will be back in the morning to post properly. 4 weeks ish til we're back for good, so hope you're ready for that trip into London...!

Hello AmIThatBad and Deliasniff I am 41 (on Tuesday eeeek) and have 4 children.

DD1 - 17
DD2 - 16
DS - 15 (in a week)
DD3 - 2½

Hello, hello!

Lemony here I haven't been around on this thread in erm, ages and ages. I'm 49, have DS - 14 and DD - 3. This summer I have mostly been visiting my Mum in hospital, decorating my sitting room and taking the kids for days out... I am now back at work for a rest

Hello all you lovely 40+ LPs. Been on MN for quite a while but mainly lurk and post occassionally, esp on the LP thread. Am 44 with a 16mo DS and have been single since I kicked exP out when DS was 2mo. Frankly I've never been happier. DS is my whole world and has given my life a purpose. I have to work FT though to keep the roof over our heads and he goes FT to nursery, but it's working for us. Also rent a spare room out on a Mon-Fri basis to help with the finances.

Doing it alone, for me, is the best way.

I can't believe I wrote that I'm 49 - I'm only 48

Thank you Dumps for reviving this thread, I had really missed it:(

Hello to all newbies and familiaries

Yes, I think the long summer took a hold and we all got caught up in 'stuff'.

Glad to see that although certain issues continue (shite exes) nothing drastically awful has happened to anyone:)

Nothing much here has changed except that when I very first started this thread I was 49...onward and upward ladies...hey rock you're catching up

I've just found this thread and am new to LP. H left 9 days ago.
It's all very complex but seems to be settling ok.

DD is 5 and has had mega meltdowns this weekend. I expected she would at some point. I think she's having difficulty understanding that daddy doesn't live with us now. Will she accept it eventually? Any advice would be gratefully accepted.

I've accepted that it's over and me and h are finding a new way to be parents in seperate houses. I dare say it may get messy at some point but so far it's ok.

40 in November and an LP for 10 years- surely I'm in?

45 and lone parent to 3 DC 19-9

Am sick of coping
Am sick of picking up the pieces
Am sad that arse of an ex gets to date/socialise/plan his life whilst I am a drudge with no free time
Am sick of him avoiding any maintenance and reducing his hours of work whilst I work full time to keep a roof over our heads
Am desperately hurt that DC has asked if she can go on a one to one trip with OW this week for a coffee..

Child of Isis - keep same boundaries and same discipline. It might be tempting to relax/spoil her or compensate but I think it's really unhelpful. You are also early days (VERY) I remember feeling like you and it has been a long hard slog but the DC are very settled now (see last whinge above)

Thank you, I am determined that DD is treated the same. H has said that he won't spoil her or buy her extra things but he's done that so I don't think he'll stop now.
He always was less strict, one of his justifications for shagging someone else!!
Quite how my being strict with DD sent him in to the bed of ow I'll never know.
I've put it down to him having some kind of midlife crisis thing.

I am going to use this situation to change direction, I don't have to defer to him anymore and me and DD can move forward in a happy environment, not one contaminated by his guilt.

Hi girls? Can I join in? Is this thread still live??

I am 40, with DD1 6.5 and DD2 6 months.

I love the idea of meeting someone, being in love again and being in a relationship, and hate the idea of growing old alone once the girls have gone, but at the same time am terrified of dating, most men in their 40s want to date someone in their 30s (or younger!). I guess I've lost some self confidence.
Then there's just the practical - I have a baby at home (DD1 does spend quite a bit of time with her father), and it will have to be a pretty special/strong man who is willing to take on two children and two different fathers.......
And where do you go to meet anyone nowadays???

All in all not a particularly attractive package really, is it?

Anyone with anything positive to add?!