<klaxon> grape sized lump... hurts to sit down...

[KatoPotato]

Wahhhh...

I've had this lump on my labia for many years now, hard but painless.

Since a few days ago - I blame spin class - it's got really big, red and painful. It's the size of a large grape and is mostly hard. I've had mag sulph paste on it, germolene, hot baths, tentative squeezes... nothing - It's hard to dress too, thanks to the location.

I've had similar before, hence my mag sulph knowledge, but this just doesnt seem to be coming to a head, paracetamol and ibuprofen are not touching the pain.

Any ideas???

How's your DS? Does he wonder what's going on?

Well done Kato! Although you appear to have mistakenly uploaded a picture of your arm when it's your minge that we're all interested in.

Not meatballs Kato - steer clear. What do you really fancy to eat tonight?

He's been a wee angel, for some reason he was singing 'pour some sugar on me!' When he woke this morning, but pronouncing sugar like 'SUGAR!' That I say instead of shit iyswim?

He's with mil who is the best goddamm mil anyone could ask for!

I realised last night that id shared my gory pic with all of you but not my own mum! She said looking at it made het burst into tears!

I've been lurking since the start of the thread, but missed the pics until now. By heck that looks as sore as fuck!

I hope you are feeling much better now and have a good Easter with lots of healing chocolate.

Shit there's a hospital church rep doing the rounds...

Thank goodness! You are proper hardcore, Kato. . Adieu, Gym!

For supper how about steak and chips? My fat bastard supper of choice (sorry, veggies).

You showed it to your mum? . I hope you warned her first!

Glad its all over, they most likely stitched then left a space then another stitch to allow the fluid to drain out. Well done OP and yee-haa for Tramadol.

My mum is the original sporner, we go on minibreaks so I can have a go at her blackheads!

Oh god Kato. Poor you I'm so pleased it's gone now (and may it never return!).

The hospital chaplain just said I look like Nana Mouskouri...

This is the most bizarre day ever

I think maybe God visited me when I was under...

I would nominate this for mumsnet classics if I knew how to nominate things for mumsnet classics

So glad gym has gone, you soooo deserve after that

But would I be hounded with requests for the photo?

Well done Kato - so pleased you are bollockless (neutered? gelded? ) and feeling better. Enjoy a massive calorific supper.

Kate

You sound stoned out of your gourd.

Glad your bruiser has been safely delivered. Bet this baby had ten fingers and ten toes.

Are you going to name change to KatoTheEunuch now?

I think I need a name change of some description...

whitewitch, I've nominated for classics. Will be a first for a sporn thread, I think. But Kato so deserves it!

Holy mother of god - I just read the whole thread and looked at the picture....
I'm but really this means "awe"

if it goes in classics, you'll need to upload the pictures of gym just so everyone understands what a big bad boy he was! (Or leave him forever more on your profile!)

Seriously you are the toughest dude of us all, Kato! respect!