Can we have a "What movie NOT to see" thread?

[ghosty]

Tell me what NOT to see and why NOT to see it ...

We got out The Black Dahlia (Josh Hartnett, Scarlett Johanssen) the other day on DVD.
Pants pants pants .... even DH didn't like it and he likes the sort of film that makes you think ... we didn't get it ... crap.
And what is it about 'mumbling' at the moment ... DH and I spent most of the film saying either, "What did he say?" or "Who the hell is he?" ...

Don't waste your money ...

Your turn -

pruni: yes, that's it, the 12A certificate> Ridicolous!
Daddyj: was it, by any chance, "il cielo e' sempre piu' blu"? was the traffic warden blond?

Yes, yes, brilliant, franca ? that is the one!
?Film about a 24 hour day in Rome, with 30 stories interwoven with 130 speaking parts? as it say on imdb, that must be it.
And the traffic warden is a blonde, all the chaps try and proposition her to avoid a ticket!
Thank you very much, grazie mille!

children of men - great, and get that woman to breastfeed FFS, the whole depends on her doing 'it'!

da vinci code - most boring saga, i enjoyed the book.

the curse of the golden flower - don't bother to watch, very unsatisfying ending! watch Kung Fu Hustle for truely good chinnese cinema.

looking forward to seeing Hot Fuzz, Pirates of the Carribean (although still annoyed at the previous films ending!), Harry Potter, Transformers, that film on climate change - still haven't seen it!

Casino Royale - pile of poo - got it out on rental the other night and DH and I both nearly fell asleep watching it..............how many 'subendings' did it have!!!!

Casbie - hot fuzz - pants, didn't raise a smile and expected so much more after shaun of the dead and spaced.

Al Gore's, An Inconvienient Truth - worth a watch.

Layer Cake - pile of poo...

Lost in Translation - watched it all - I really believed at some point something would happen

but the worst ever has to be Shakespeare in Love - truly terrible smug pile of poo...

Hulk

and

Being John Malkovich -

Both were one of those movies that are so dreadful you end up watching till the end because you are desperately clinging to the hope that at some point it just HAS to start getting better............but it never does.

World Trade Center - another reason to despise Nicolas 'SMUG GIT' Cage. Such a pile of crap.

Probably the three worst films I have ever seen are: The Piano, Brokeback Mountain, Love Actually.

I quite liked Being John Malcovitch though! And yes - Shakespeare In Love is dire; but then Gwynnie is pretty dire, full stop. Her "Emma" is embarassingly bad.

yes, the piano, terrible movie. and don't even mention gwineth paltrow. sliding doors. enough said

Message withdrawn

hot fuzz fab imo

but I do like a good Boy Film

lots of running and shooting

had two big glasses of wine before seeing it came out with heart racing like a train

god, love loads of these ones

loathed Robin Hood Prince of Thieves at the time but within its own parameters i suppose it's ok

no, scrub that, it's still awful

Oh. Jungle Book 2. I went to see this with dh and a close friend who doesn't do any film involving violence, glamourisation of crime or anything else interesting, unless it stars Johnny Depp.

Anyone involved in Jungle Book 2 should go and get a job with more dignity, such as cleaning toilets.

Yep agree that Shakespeare in Love was overated.
I was annoyed that it beat The Truman Show at the Oscars.

I tried to watch Manhattan the other night. Now I know it's a 'classic' and Woody Allen is a 'genius' and all that - but I had to switch it off, I was so bored.

I watched Just Like Heaven instead and really enjoyed it

I love Manhattan!
yesterday I watched the history of violence. I'm still quite baffled. Not sure whether it's a masterpiece or total rubbish.

Thanks franca - I had much the same reaction to HoV. Amazing reviews praising 'brave' 'original' decisions - was like a faithfully filmed comic IMO. Seemed very like Far From Heaven to me - other film people LARVE it - ordinary schmo like me goes 'Huh?' on a large scale.

Lol at "brave decision'. I found the beginning (the motel shooting) quite gripping, if a bit slow. I think it built up the tension quite well, and then it became quite funny. Well, a critic would start going on about Cronemberg (or cronenberg???), thankfuly I'm not one !
Haven't seen far from heaven, I'm not really sure I want to...

Interesting to see how many worsts are other people's bests!

Can I just add "The Banger Sisters" as my contribution for the what not to see list.

Really like Susan Sarandon, and thought her in slutty, groupie mode would be great.

It was dire.

The worst thing was that there was a good film in there screaming to come out, but it was so damn lazy - lazy plot, lazy script and lazy acting. Most annoying.

And I will also add my vote for Magnolia as being pants. Big pants. Big greying pants. With skidmarks.

the day after tommorrow.

I pissed my pants laughing all the way through. You're being chased by a mega-fast permafrost and you escape by closing a door? And the political head clobber? Don't make me laugh - lots of people die but we're supposed to really care that the doggie-woggie lives? ack.

That and Starship Troopers, which I walked out of. Drivel.

The Horse Whisperer
Bridges of Madison County
Donnie Darko
That musical one set in Paris with Nicole Kidman and Ewan McGregor

Are the 4 films I've walked out of the cinema before the end.

American beauty
The Sin Eater (so so dire even with Heath Ledger to drool over)
Secrets and Lies
The Crow 2

Pans labyrinth was good I thought other than the awful gross violence.

We got out Bewitched yesterday with Nicole Kidman, biggest pile of crap I've seen in ages. Spent most of it on here actually while kids bickered during it. I did put the original series on my Amazon rental list though. I loved those.