The Anxiety Club (continued) !

[mooseloose]

Hi girls, i have started a new thread for us all. The other was too long. Hope you all find it.

Thank you yommymommy. I have actually resolved to go and speak to my therapist again, the one who treated me last year after my mc. Am feeling a bit better tonight because I managed to stop myself from checking my BP (I must never measure it in the evening, it makes me very anxious for some reason - probably because it reminds me of hospital). It was OK this morning, wish I could stop worrying! Also am going to try a new baby class this Friday, hope the other women will be nice. (I'd need a hopeful face here, it's not in the emoticons!)

Hi Mouette
Welcome From what you have said, I feel that you will gain in confidence about your child as time goes on, it is such a huge responsibility to be in sole charge of this little life that small decisions that in your previous life you would have taken with ease seem to take on a new level of seriousness.

I have run 2 toddler groups for the last 6 years and I can honestly say that about 60-70% of the new mums who join us are uncertain about their parenting abilities, and yet they all have happy healthy children. No one does things the same way, and anyone who tells you there is one way of parenting is Lying to you.

As for your blood pressure, obviously you have to do it at certain times however when you are feeling anxious, could you take the same amount of time to sit down and mentally check through your body, relax yourself from your toes up. - I have been trying to do this when I get panic attacks, feeling that although my chest is tight my toes are relaxed, my ankles move freely and are relaxed, my calves arent tight and I can flex my ankles and so on.

If you swap the urge for checking with the more calming thing then you may find that over time you find yourself checking less.

Sorry if none of the above is relevant, I have no worries about you telling me I am talking Sh^&t.

Hope you have had a good day Blissa & Yommy.
Things not great here, just counting the days until I can see my lady on Monday.

Welcome Mouette

Firstly, congratulations on your little boy. I think we all can empathise with what you say about the anxiety and loneliness of being a new mum. We all question whether we are doing it right, it's part of the job. As Greyskull says there is no right way for everyone, you eventually find what works for you and your child.

I am also a checker of things, although not my BP. I tend to find that the more I check the more I have to check if that makes sense? I understand that you have to do it, do you have a set time?

I'm sure the new baby class will be ok, there will be lots of other mums who feel the same.

Did you get to the bunypark Yommy?

Are you ok Greyskull?
xx

Hi again ladies,

BTP - I loved your post! Apart from the bit when you say things not good here Is everything okay?? How did your house blessing go?? Is that something you do often?? My neighbours done that when they moved in a few years ago. Hope ur okay! Tomorrow is thurs already! Can you believe that??? Told you monday would be back round before we knew it! {{{{{{hugs}}}}}

Blissa - never made the bunny park. Ended up going to meet my friends for lunch - eating out twice in a week - oink! Not to mention all the crap I have been eating in between times! I seriously need to get a grip on myself . Went to tesco after n bought some nice hallo'een candles :D Mental note - need to stop wasting money!!! lol! Tesco had a lot of their toys on half price sale to got DS2's birthday sorted out today too! :D

Mouette - i'm sure your goup will be fine! Like BTP said, most of the mummies are feeling the same way you are! It would be a good idea to speak to your councellor, they will be able to point you in the right direction! Plus, totally agreed with what she said about becoming a mummy for the first time! NOTHING can prepare you for that! When I think back I never enjoyed much when my DS1 was a baby - the contant worrying about him, everything, anything and daft things, etc! I have been able to enjoy DS2 much more and I am really thankful for that :D

Anywho, I am going to head off to bed now! Not sure how good a night its going to be as DS2 has a bad cough so I think he will be tossing and turning tonight, poor wee monkey!

Hi to anyone else if you are around!

Goodnight x x x

Hi girls

You lucky mare Yommy, eating out again . How is ds2s cough? Hope you all got a good nights sleep.

Hope you are ok today Greyskull, monday is nearly here!

How are you today Mouette?

I've been into town this morning to get a present for my nephew and a few other bits. Like you Yommy I need to stop wasting money too and this morning only bought what I went in for apart from a couple of stocking fillers I saw for the dds

Muscles feel a bit less achey today and my chest isn't so tight

Dear ladies,
Thank you very much for all your kind messages and encouragement. It makes me feel better to know I'm not alone in feeling like this. Today is not too bad, again measured my BP only once and it was OK. I agree, the more I check, the more I want to check and the more anxious I get. I don't have to measure it at a set time, I find that if I do it first thing in the morning I'm not too anxious about it. If I wait any longer or measure it more than once I get very anxious. My GP wanted me to measure it randomly throughout the day but I'll just explain the situation to him. My Mum also takes tablets and has a heart condition, her BP gets measured only once every 3 months and it's always in the morning!
I have made an appointment to see my counsellor this Tuesday, my in-laws will babysit.
I was beginning to feel anxious again this afternoon at around 3.30 pm so I went for a walk with DS. It made me feel better, but I forgot to put the pureed carrots in the freezer - so they were out for a couple of hours, but they were covered so I hope it will be OK. I do tend to worry a lot about cleaning and germs and food etc.
Yommymommy do enjoy your food! I seem to have gone off mine in the past couple of weeks.
Blissa: glad you had a successful day shopping. Does your chest feel tight because of anxiety? Mine does that sometimes.
And Greyskull: I hope you feel better soon! Does it not get better at the week-end?
Love & blessings to all xxx

Afternoon ladies,
today has not been too bad, managed to sleep for a couple of hours again this afternoon whilst DS2 slept so am feeling refreshed, also restarted writing my diary last night, I let out all the unacceptable feelings that I feel ashamed about and then make it ok by writing down the things that I have to be grateful for. it can be little things like the boys playing nicely for 30 mins so I can do this!
I feel wierd the closer we are getting to monday, I am not feeling that I can explain to my lady about how bad I have been she can't help being ill so the feelings of disappointment and being let down are unfair but they have been eating away at me all week
I am supposed to be going out to the pub with some girlfriends this evening but my blood has been pumping so fast each time I think about it I am not sure how I am going to get there You know when you have a twitch in your muscle/eye lid type thing? well I seem to get that in my heart when I get panicky, I have managed to convince myself that I am having a mini heart attack each time

OMG what a moany post!!!!!!!1 sorry ladies.

Blissa - great to hear that your chest isn't too tight today, hope the rest of your day has been as good as this morning

Mouette - sounds like things have been a bit better for you today, and as for the carrot if you reheat it thoroughly before feeding your little one you will kill any bugs anyway. If it is worth anything we only had one icecube tray and the puree used to stay in the bowl whilst the first lot froze - it took 4 loads to freeze it all so some of it had been out for ages

Yommy - how are you today?

Panic attacks are awful Greyskull, aren't they? When I measure my BP and am feeling anxious and it's high, I always think I'm going to have a stroke, even though the BP does come down quite quickly once I stop panicking. You're not alone! But I have been repeatedly told panic attacks are harmless really. When you think about people who run marathons or do a lot of exercise surely their heart must be beating really fast too!
Anyway I hope you do manage to feel better whether you go out or not - perhaps you will feel happier once you see your friends? xx

Evening Ladies,

Good day here! Weather was lovely here so was out at the park this afternoon with the boys! Even managed to get my bed clothes all washed and hung out

Nice to have you back today mouette! And glad you are feeling a little more positive! Well done on taking the steps to go back n see you councellor! In answer to your question about my liking food! Yes - I love food - especially rich flavoured food! However, I have a really bizarre relationsip with it, which is related to my anxiety I don;t have an eating disorder as such, but its a long story! When I first started struggling with anxiety I could harly eat at all without feeling like I was going to gag on it or throw up so I just grazed through the day instead of eating large meals! Still do to a certain extent. I think its all related to being so sick when I was pregnant and feeling like I had low blood sugar when I haven;t eaten so in my head it calculates hunger = bad things happeneing! Dispite my weird eating habits I am the slimmest I have been since i HAD ds1, so must be doing something right??? lol! Sorry for long, boring story again!!!

BTP - Glad to hear you are feeling better too! I get that weird feeling in my heart too! Its horrible, makes me feel like my heart is literaly skipping a beat! I just tell myself I will be fine!! Easier said when I am feeling calm! And you should def tell your counsellor how you were feeling when she was off - not because u want to guilt trip her, but because she needs to know how situations make you feel!!!

Blissa - glad you are feeling better! What stocking fillers did you buy??? I am really getting into the christmas shopping spirit now, lol! Back at tesco today n bought 2 presents for DS1's christmas and my mum bought him a pirate ship! I know he is going to love that!!!

I have decided to have a massive toy clear out to make way for all the new things! I have DS2 b'day on the 27th of this month, Christmas and then DS1's b'day in feb, so if don;t start now i'll never get it done!!! Makes me sad to get rid of toys when they are still in such good condition! If you know anyone looking for toy bundles on the cheap let them know and let me know!!!! Would rather the went to someone I know would appriciate them!!!!

Think I'll put a post about it in a more appropriate section of MN!!

Anyway, sorry for going on and on and on! lol!

Hope everyone else is well!

x x x

Thank you for the tips re the carrots Greyskull. Can I reheat the puree in the microwave on high for 1 mn then let it cool down to a suitable temperature for DS to eat? Excuse the stupid questions, I'm so new to all this and paranoid about poisoning him/burning him/underfeeding him etc. Lord knows why, he seems to be perfectly happy and eats anything I put in his mouth!!
Good evening yummymummy glad you had a good day. What kind of toys do you have? Anything suitable for a 6-month + baby, or are your DS much older?
Good night to all, may God/The Great Spirit/Mother Nature/insert name of appropriate deity here grant you a good night's sleep.

Hi girls

It's good to hear you've had a better day Mouette. That's about right for the carrot puree, although a minute might be a bit long for only one or two cubes. I found weaning pretty hard to get my head around, how long have you been doing it? I do get a tight chest with my anxiety, but with me my anxiety was kicked off by having problems with my chest and so when I get aches or twinges there it kicks off the anxiety, does that make sense? I'm kind of learning how to tell the difference.

I started keeping a diary back in April Greyskull. It does help to get everything out. I know what you mean about your heart beat too, mine will be normal and then it seems to stop and then make up for the gap with one big beat! I think Yommy is right in that you should tell your counsellor how it made you feel when you knew you couldn't see her. I hope you have made it out tonight, it will do you good.

I just picked a couple of name plates for the girls bikes when I was in a card shop Yommy. We got one for ds in Cornwall, but couldn't get the girls names, so when I saw them today-spelt correctly- I thought I'd get them as they were only a couple of quid.

I'm glad I'm not the only one that's started on their shopping, I really need to spread the cost this year and have been looking in charity shops for some bargains. Last week I bought a brand new Jenga game for £1.99. I'm also going to make some chutneys and other goodies for family presents.

The Christmas appeal has started over in the Christmas topic, I'm sure some of your toys would be appreciated?

Thanks Blissa. I only started weaning a week ago, so it's all very new. So much advice out there, a lot contradictory! I'm sticking with the Gina Ford book at the moment, modified by the advice of my health visitor. Glad I'm not the only one thinking it's a steep learning curve - my big worry is him choking when I start giving him finger foods!
Hope you all have a good night. xx

Blissa, Thanks for reminding me about the Christmas Appeal, I sent some stuff out last year and it was fabulous to read how happy the recipients were, just seemed to let her know that there were people out there routing for her. I definately going to send some more stuff this year, it is a lovely thing indeed.

Hi girls! I am naughty not being online this wek, but seem to have things on every day this week/night! Am chilling tonight- benidorm on soon!
I have just skimmed through the messages - you chatterboxes! Hope you all ok now the weekend is here!
I am impressed with all this Christmas shopping activity! We have some books left at work every month to order, and there are some really nice gift sets - The Worst Witch, hairy McLairy, Allan Alhberg happy Families - I will buy some for presents as they are really good value - £5 ish! Lovely too.
Isn't it getting cold now at night - no heating on yet though!

Moose are the books left at workfrom www.thebookpeople.co.uk ?

they have some great deals on there.

I don't know actually - they leave about 15 a month. I bought that 'how to feed your family on one poundetc etc etc book' last month. That was £3. Bought a couple of those for pres too.

Hi Girls,

How are you all??? Enjoying the weekend I hope! I am not long in from a birthday party that the boys had been invited too. Not quite sure how I ended up there, as I was arguing with myself all morning about going as I didn;t really now anyone there. Anyway, we made it and the boys had a ball!

Had another hard noght with DS2 last night, he cold is waking him at night and keeping him awake! Argh! Last night we were up between 12.30 and 2! I couldn;t get back to sleep for ages! Hes wasn;t crying, just determind that he wasn;t going back to sleep!

Not much else new to report!

Moose, what channel was benidorm on last night so angry I missed it as I could find it on the virgin guide! Maybe I am finally loosing the plot!

I am in the same position as your blissa - was are really tight on money this christmas so having to start in advance! Plus I am cutting down what I spend as wet mad last year and my house is now more like a toy shop than a house!

Anyway, hope you are all well
x x x

Was it BBC? You can watch it on the i player/ Look in the sat or sunday paper weekly tv guide - it will be in there. Its right daft it is!!

Going bed in min, really tired x

evening ladies,
have started panicing about seeing my lady on Monday.. Good God if I am not panicing about not seeing her now I am in a mess because I am seeing her!!!!!!!!!!!

I just want to hide

Morning Girls,

Can you believe I have toget up at 6.30 on a sunday!!! DS2 was a nightmare last night, AGAIN! Anyway, its sunday and i love sundays so just going to enjoy my day!

Moose, discovered benidorm on i player! Problem is apparently SITV haven;t bought the programme so only gets shown down south, we get to watch some other Tripe!!!!

Looks like a beautiful October morning out there today Cold! A day for wrapping up!

BTP - how are you feeling today! Are you panicing because you want to tell your lady how you really felt when she was off, but you are scared of her reaction??? She will be lovely and the session will go fine! Just try to enjoy you sunday as best you can! Are you making anymore cakes at the moment???

Hope you all have a lovely day x x x

morning yommy , how r u ? has anyone tried rescue remedy ? i bought some to try to help with anx ..

thanks

Morning Mumof2000,

I am good thanks! How are you???

Not tried rescue remedy, not sure if anyone else has! Have you tried it yet yourself???

Got anything nice planned for ur sunday???

x x x

Morning , thanks anyway , no havent tried it yet not too anxious today yet ....

today tidy house , bake a cake with the children and then go swimming ....then MIL just invited us to hers for roast later ..[grin ] so day off cooking

how bout you ??

xxx

in panic anxiety mode today ..... going for mole check at cinic....yearly one , had bad go with worry anx about them last week went to doc who said all looked fine ,but im sooooo worried anxious .....spent most of last week in tears with worry and very mad PMT .

just need some kind words from anyone as DH gone to work and no friends to come with me

xxxxx