Are you (a) tired of ttc (b) have sore ladybits from SWIing ! If this sounds like you then hop aboard.

[Icedlemonmuffin]

Hi have made a new batch of cock tail muffins for those of us who have been trying for along time and

(a) are struggling to get excited by the sight of a cockadoodle running towards every other day of our fertile days !!

(b)have sore ladybits from all the SWIing we have been doing the past few months

and

(c) who just want to moan,groan and bitch how boring it can all get!

All funny sperm killing stories welcome I need a laugh and to know I'm not the only one going insane ttc

So hop aboard and you to can be a bus whore like me !!!!!!!!

Sending you a huge cyber hug muffin. Tis shit.

Well today I had to count where I was on my cycle. I had no idea. Not obsessing about it so much as convinced there is something wrong or it will happen anyway... Who knows.

Thanks Lou.

I have stayed away from the bus this month so I don't get obsessed as well, trying to forget when last rtd arrived so then I don't know when next one is due. I'm sending myself demented.

They should do sperm in an iv drip, so then I could hook myself up every night!!!

Hi all!

Wis I had been arrested...& don't talk to me about fresh blood. I seem to be finally coming to the end of this 3 week worth of RTD!!!! What an apt name. DH & BF (best friend) are on my case to go to dr. BF thinks I may now be anemic as I feel so tired & bruises all over my legs!

So shag watch is out for me at the mo & I have no idea what CD I'm possibly on!!!

Sorry to be a downer - lets get the tequila, salt & lime out!!!!

Fairy I'm with your dh and bf you should go to the docs just to rule things out. I had a mad funny turn at work (blurred vision, felt dizzy was sick) which went on for about three hours, went to gp and ended up giving four jars of blood! Going back for results next week he said it could be something simple like vertigo or it could be my thyroid! I scared myself silly and googled my symptoms not doing that again!!

We really need alcohol tonight the stronger the better!!

Firstly FairyG phone the doctors in the morning and book and appointment. Is this your first month off the clomid?

Anyway more importantly (well not really) but more fun. I am lining up the flaming sambucas. I think I might have a few. Might encourage me to have some sex.... Or maybe not.

See if I had a funny turn Muffin then I would have taken that as a pregnancy symptom even after the RTOD. Not that I am obsessed or anything....

Well Lou my manager at work said in between my sobs 'are you sure your not pregnant?' I sobbed no im not.

Nurse who took my bloods said 'are you sure your not pregnant?'. Dh said 'your driving me mad are you sure your not?' I said no I'm not had rtd two weeks ago and I don't feel pregnant, googled my symptoms and it's was either ms or underactive thyroid (scared my self silly and cried again) . Last rtd was really heavy and a lot of clots so I don't think being preg is possible, though it would be nice to wake up and be three months gone!

Will update on Tuesday when I go back for results.

Pass me a sambuca (or two) and then I'm off to bed I'm shattered (another of my symptoms )as well as pins and needles in my hands which I'm sure isn't a prego symptom, Im such a drama queen

Have you peed on a stick? I had carpal tunnel when I was duffed and that is a bonafide symptom. You could have that decidual bleeding that some other mad symptom spotter had posted on one of these threads. Would shut up the ones who ask you continuously tho suppose they will test that when they are doing everything else....

Lou I am not going near the dreaded sticks as I promised never to pee on one again until I was at least two weeks late.

Also had carpal tunnel but these pins and needles feel different, anyway stop encouraging me , I convinced myself I could feel movement in my stomach the other day but it was wind

Has any one died from mad symptom spotting ?Because I know I'm going a bit mad with all my odd symptoms.

I once convinced myself I cold feel a baby but twas wind. I think this symptom spotting should be put in the doctors manual as a fatal illness.

Well you don't need to go near the sticks as am sure pregnancy testing is done on most blood samples. So there. To be fair I am not a mad POASer either. Too depressing to see nothing there.

Lou I will cry on Tuesday when gp goes through results and says 'no your not pregnant that's not the problem.'

I used to poas all the time but I was just torturing myself so I do my best to stay away from them I buy myself some chocolate instead.

Where is Lia?

Don't cry muffin. You know me I am always convincing myself that I have won a baby.

God Lou I convince myself that I have won the baby bingo every five minutes on a bad day! I think when , wow I said when not if, it happens I will go into shock and denial.

It's really cold today had to wear my winter coat on school run, hurry up sun, I don't like being cold.

Sorry for being AWOL my lovelies - blimmin work getting in the way of updating my shagwatch! Nothing much to report anyway - RT of D looming close, and I have loads of tests to sort out when it gets here in preperation for my IUI.

Hope everything goes ok Iced at the GP's.
Fairy are you taking some iron supplements just in case? have a good weekend down the park ladies, I'll check in properly next week.

hello ladies, hope you don't mind me joining your thread. reading about the whole symptom spotting and trying not to let it take over my life... we're past the potentially effective shag period this month - need a few days break ;)

Hi Tequila love your name! And welcome to the park or are we still at the beach? I hope your skirts short and your boob tube grubby and make yourself comfy on Dazzas lap.

Have you been trying long? I've been trying so long it feels like ttfc has taken over my life and made my ladybits fed up as well as sore!!

Hi ladies - good I went. Turns out I may have miscarried - didn't even know I was pg!!!! Def no sore boobs or anything like usual symptoms. Gotta go for blood tests to rule out anemia, thyroid or blood sugars.

No I finished clomid in February.

Going to chill out this weekend.

xxx

God Fairy so sorry to hear that, look after yourself and take it really easy this weekend.

Fairy see we do talk sense sometimes. I hope you are being looked after.

In honour of Tequilla am going to line up some slammers for us all!

LIA where are you?? I hope you have not been doing anything radical like look after your kids

Hey park/beach whores

I'm back from my holiday, so depressing to be back but at least the sun is shining. I'm a nice shade of red which is now peeling really bad and i burnt my nips and bum lol. Just kidding! I'm a nice shade of brown but do have a white bum ;)
I left all my chavvy clothes behind and just filled my pink playboy suitcase with several bottles of apple hooch, white lightning and sambucca. Anyone fancy getting pissed?

Are we still taking part it shag watch? Looks like everyone has got fed up of shagging. Well i'm on cd14 and have managed 3 shags. Think i am ovulating today because of the pain in my side.
The last time we did the dirty deed was yesterday morning (we rarely have morning bonks but as we were on holiday it's different) but i stood up almost straight away and went to the toilet so if i am ovulating today then the chances of conceiving are pretty slim because i should have stayed lying down for a bit or is that a myth?

Fairy sorry if it was a miscarriage, hopefully this month it will stick.

ok ladies, relaaax, I'm back.

Well I have had a shit week, Dh has been in a foul mood, thought our my great idea of a date was stupid and generally mooched around like a bear with a sore head. He went away Wed, and was supposed to return Friday, when he said he was coming home Thursday night, i was a bit peeved I can tell you, was looking forward to some nice atmosphere.

so no bloody sex since last weeks morning quickie, up until this morning so chances of me being upduffed this month are more remote than a remote thing at a remote convention.

He's in a better mood now but another sodding month wasted. I wonder if he's really into this baby making malarky and that was a good excuse to not shag.

Kids got photoshoot tomorrow all day for the next show in June. Last weeks show was fab. Ds has a shoot for the white company on Tuesday and I just won tickets to go see Mus the word at the theatre on Tuesday evening so that should keep me fromm symptom spotting busy until such time as the BRTOD (bloody red tide etc etc)

fairy am very sorry to hear your news, platitudes won't make you feel better but you know where we are.

Think i'm gonna have a hooch or something now, might even make it a snakebite and black,

Hope everyone else is well.

This is for you Lia

aarrrrrggggghhhhh

Bloody men, why aren't they like those lovely blokes on jk who are always up for it and always get you and your best friend pregnant!!

Lia here is the turkey baster looks like you need it now.

PS I have sterlised it first so all nice and clean.

Sorry to hear that everyone has had a shitty week. Sorry your dh doesn't have enough imagination Lia, he should have been grateful for a night out without stressing about kids and ttc etc!

Welcome back Ladybird, pleased you have had a good holiday, can I have some of your hooch if there is any left?

Have a relaxing weekend Fairy, have some of ladybirds hooch. Just try to sober up before your blood tests or they will come back with the result that you are a drunken chav!

We went for our first hosp appt on thursday, with nurse first to get all test results checked and history sorted so that when we see cons in early June then she has all the details. Nurse said that the results all seemed to be within the boundaries of acceptable. So from that it seems that we are heading towards "Unexplained" as an explanation. Ho Hum. Will have to wait for the consultant. She did stick me with a needle tho for more bloods. This baby business - you go within 50 yards of a medical person and they just want your blood!