The BESH 30's TTC: "Shall I get me rat out, Doctor?"

[ChoChoSan]

The Palace is open and the anti-freeze is flowing - Blue Bols 50p a shot! Two for one on Archers and orange, for the classy BESHies (the ones who keep their hats on whilst undergoing an internal examination).

We have Vampire Bill and Brian Cox in the Dungeon, and David Mitchell and Brian Eno tending the bar....

Morning BESHes
hows everyone?
had roast chicken also yesterday nom nom nom and roast spuds nom nom nom nom

still no droid
and had a headache few days
very very paranoid and too scared to test
please come and batter some sense into me...

morning...Chocho reporting for duty, after a weekend of woofling, heralded by confusing convo with Iggy on Friday about when the fuck I might be due on...come with me now on a journey through woofly madness.

Okay...here's the data:

Tuesday 12th Jan...spotting late at night, so lets say:

CD1 - Weds 13th
CD16 - Treatment/OV date

Sooo, today is CD27 so the droid is imminent, buuuut I am not supposed to test until Thursday, because they say test 14 days after treatment, ie. CD30. I did a cheeky test this am on a Tesco own brand...babyfail.

Symptoms:

Sore tits since last Weds - this is a usual PMT symptom too, but perhaps not for so long (hopeful emoticon).

Slight nausea when I first wake up for a nanosecond...likely psychosomatic

Watery FJ - I googled this yesterday, and was well convinced this was a sign of updiff, but then had my bonfire thoroughly pissed on by reading Scorps post from last night re. 'pant droolage' ().

I welcome your analyses, comments and ultra violence!

Sorry Cho . But that was just my experience - your pant droolage could indeed be a sign of diffage.

SallyAnnDURR, for the love of Charlie Mouse, POAFS! I can't take the suspense! Good luck, btw

As for telling folks in RL, the people who know are: TYF (thought he ought to be clued in ), 2 friends (a couple) who don't live near me and who I knew wouldn't ask me about stuff unless I wanted to talk, a friend who overheard me mentioning on my mobile to TYF (we weren't out together or nuffink, she saw me on the street and came up behind me to say hello and overheard) and even though I asked her not to talk about it to me and keep it a secret, asks me loudly about how things are going, wink wink, in front of other friends and I repeat every time I don't want to talk about it it and it's a secret... to no avail, grrr, and my Mum, who doesn't mention it unless I want to talk and then she's really reassuring.

My Mum really is the tops - the other night on the phone I was joking that if she really loved me then she'd carry my baby for me and the wonderful, stoopid woman is now upset and guilty that she can't do it for me!!! I've had to text her again to reassure her I don't want her to and it was 100% a joke! She's nearly 62 and back in the day, Drs told her a 3rd child could kill her and she's now saying she would if she could! Bonkers! But lovely.

MIL won't know till I'm the size of the prow of a ship

Hi Scorps...don't be , it's helpful to have a reality check from time to time...I am swinging from one extreme to the other this month, I suppose it's because this is my last IUI, and I am really hoping it's going to work so I don't have to do IVF...and also because I am running out of energy to deal with any more babyfails.

Anyway, if I fail again this month then at least I can use all the steam/sauna facilities at the spa I am going to on Thursday night (Xmas prezzie from friend!), and I can drink when I am on holiday next week...take solace where you can get it...

As for 'who knows?'...most of my friends because I am not good at keeping secrets, and didn't expect to be at it this long. I have a handful of close friends, not masses of mates, therefore most are aware. Our parents know, and my business partner knows because I have to go off for treatment. Plus some people know I had m/c, so probably guessing I am ttc. All in all, about half of London!

Scorps that is sweet about your mum, by the way. One of the Boyfs best friends offered to donate me an egg, if I need one!

Come on Sal poas...how late are you?

not really sure, thats the confusing thing cho - think oved on about day 21, cycle usually about 33days, now on day 36
hmmmmmmmmmmm
think if can hold off til fri i will and then test..........

Dear God sal didn't realise you were officially late. Its MANDATORY to POAS if you're late. Hell, its mandatory in these parts from about 10 mins after doing the deed!

C'mon, pee, pretty please?

Fucks sake sal we need you to POAS NOW

chochi dunno about your woofling state - hard to say... But I never get a positive before 13 dpo - so Weds for you?? I have def got negatives before each positive...

scropula Your mum is a susperstar innit.

Hi Iggy...yeah - same here...never got positive before CD28, though having said that, I am s'posed to wait til farhkin CD30 - that is TWO WHOLE EXTRA DAYS of menkulness...someone sedate me, puhlease...pass the Caiparinhas!

Come on Sal Whatchewwaitingfor?

Sal you will be shown the door of the ginpalace if you don't poas soon!

mega-menkul alert

I PIAPed on two sticks this morning, both ov and preg. No idea why, perhaps I was making some sort of urine-based cocktail and thought a variety of sticks would make for prettier umbrellas. Both negative, of course. I'm so embarrassed at my insanity.

Uh oh Lyra. Step away from the piss sticks, make yourself a large double Gin and orange and give yourself a good talking to. No good will come of weeing on all sticks in the house.

Now on the other hand, Sal stop counting to a hundred and POAS!!! If you ov'd on day 21 then you should get the final result 15 days later I reckon.

Only 6 more episodes of series 4 to go. Husband refusing to shag me today and the tumble dryer mechanic and plasterer are coming over later. What to do girls?

By the way Laurie I did chuckle at your bedtime chat with boyf. I too have been guilty of nagging about tax spreadsheets at about midnight, resulting in me or him ending up in the spare room for about an hour until one of us stops huffing.

Lyra it's ok, we've all done it. Haven't we?

Try again tomorrow.

POAS! POAS!

Does anyone else sing that to the tune of Monty Python's "Sit on My Face"? Just me then? Haven't figured out the rest of the lyrics mind.

Ok Ok!!!
tomorrow. i will POAS tomorrow. i promise.

IFFFF it is neg i will Blame You All

well obv not actually, if it is a neg i will be in here slugging gin and wailing on your necks

but hey.

me me me me me! how's everybody else??

yeah...what's goin' down, slags...it's me, Lyra and Sal keeping the menkulness flowing on our own here...come on you WOOFL-ers, you know who you are...

fingers still crossed for Cho

not sure I should quite be 2WOOFLing yet as still have no idea if/when I ovulate. But TH has got v keen on the SWI bit this week which is good - not had this much sex since we were on honeymoon!

Facebook today is full of engagement announcements, which is definitely preferable to baby ones. Mind you, I've also just been told by someone that she's going to be a gran again, and that's with daughter (or might be dil, I get confused) only 5 weeks gone . If I do get diffed I'll be so paranoid no-one will be allowed to know, oh, until it's born I reckon.

"Does anyone else sing that to the tune of Monty Python's "Sit on My Face"? "

Yes, I do Muser!

Yes but is your mother a hamster?

And does your father smell of elderberries?

(true fact: we seriously considered getting married at the castle where that scene was shot)

Would definitely have guaranteed interesting speeches. What a set of geniuses (plural of genius anyone?). The pythons, not your family Curly.

genii?

yeah, shame we'd never have got my granny up the stairs.

BTW sal POAfuckinS!

And goodnight - I'm off for a nice massage from SFF then sleep