30s TTC - We BESH you a Merry Jizzmas and a droid-free new year!

[CurlyCasper]

Come in, come in. The wine is mulling, the bird is stuffed and cooked. We have a huge table at which to enjoy our festive feast, and the rippling Ricky Whittle is the centrepiece, draped in berries to be removed by whatever method you choose.

A bottle of Gin and an elf-man in a box awaits each and every one of you. Just make your wish and when you undo the bow he will appear.

There's a nativity tableau in the corner, for praying to the baybee Jebus and, most importantly of all, Santa has been asked to deliver the gift of exceptional fertility, so that each and every BESH can enter the new year with a baybeeee in their tum tum.

Oh, and I've let a few cats in to aid with the 2WOOFL menkulness.

Now, let's get together and get the tree up!

Right. Am definitely not going to focus on this month then. I don't think I ovulated and I've decided there's no reason why you ought to be more fertile after a m/c, so everyone who says you are can sod off.

Besides, if I don't get diffed for a few months I'd get a Christmas Eve baby. Which would mean not having to go anywhere at Christmas. I wants.

Oh I did get thrush though. Nice. I didn't even SWI enough to warrant that! Grr.

Is the medicine for that ok to take if you are diffed? Am sure I'm not but would rather not risk it.

Natural bio yoghurt on a mouse, and up yr foof. job done.

A mouse? I am not Richard Gere!

Well I wasn't thinking of a real one, rather one out of a packet, but whatever floats your boat

Oh that kind of mouse! I don't have any of those. I am a knit your own lentils mooncup user. I suppose I could fill my mooncup with yogurt and do handstands.

I read 'mouse' and thought 'why would you stick a bit of Dell kit up your fanjo?' No wonder I can't get pregnant when my brain comes out with dross like that.

took me a while to twig what you were on about (and had gone from real mice via computer mice) so I think that's a perfectly normal way of thinking Polly Muser I now have this great mental image of you balanced on your head, pot of yogurt to hand!

I eventually got some work done, the problem with working at home is that faffing the day away's all the easier, and the work is still sat there waiting for you in the evening. Hey ho, will be more motivated tomorrow......

muser I didn't ov the month after the MC either - is fucking annoying. Am wondering if the thrush is related to the lentil mooncup you appear to be using... doesn't sound hygenenic

I think it took about 6 weeks for the droid to show up after my mc so maybe I ovulated but a bit later, I'm not sure.

muser I naturally assumed after my mc that I would fall pregnant immediately because apparently that's legend. As it transpired I had a longer than normal cycle so was absolutely convinced... until we started packing the car for a c@mp|ng trip - at which point the droid appeard at full volume as it were...

Ladies - I have virtually baked a whole heap of dark, moist chocolate brownies and brewed an enormous pot of tea. Tuck in! (Apols for lack of alcohol - felt like a cuppa - but is my best tea-set!)

Ooh, are we having proper tea cups and saucers? How lovely. Mmmm brownies.... I take it these are dairy/yeast/sugar free? Excellent, nomnomnom. Thanks Vag, just what I needed.

oh a tea party Yes, please! Thanks vagolina

I went in search of cake at lunchtime. There are normally yummy, proper cakes, baked by the one of the lovely catering ladies, to be found somewhere here at work, but I guess it's too soon after the hols. I had to make do with a packaged muffin. Not the same

Have been dropping hints to SFF all day about baking me a cake

Mmmm, brownies. And virtual ones have no calories - excellent!

mm, brownies.

One of my oldest mates called me last night to tell me she was pregnant - really delighted for her, but she got pregnant only within a couple of months of trying

God it's cold. My heating is on full and I'm still freezing. Is being cold a symptom? No, thought not.

Talking of cold, has everyone seen the "stuck in the snow having a baby" thread? I want a baybee in the snow!

yes, it is very exciting. Hope she is snuggling her new born now.

am i in the right place? can i join in?

Am 34, TTC number 2 (for me, will be first for my DP) been off the pill for over a month now.

Have read back a couple of pages and wanted to add to the possible festival attendees that i am trying to decide about Glastonbury this year. Have until the end of Feb to decide. Am doing some smaller, more local festies too.

Welcome queenrollo! There is a quiz somewhere that traditionally people do when they join. Don't worry it's not scary!

Hiya, can I join you please. I was 30 last month so just creep in. DP and I are starting ttc no1/no3 this month. Have only just come off the pill and are both really excited!

this one? i found it on the first page.......

1. Do you like gin? (This is compulsory, you must say 'Yes')

I think i must own shares in Bombay Sapphire by now. The sloe gin i made was very nice....we were serenading the radiator by about 1.30pm on Boxing Day.

2. Men - are you a gold digger or a cradle snatching cougar?

I traded in the old (younger) model after 14 years for an older more reliable model.

3. Baybee-making - to put a baybee in your tumtum, which hole do you use: a) weewee b) poopoo c) foofoo d) none, you just pray to the baby Jebus.

i tell you what.....getting in there is a damnsight easier and more fun that getting it out......

4. Testing - when someone wonders if they should test for updiff (pg), do you: a) bellow 'POAS!' at them non-stop and punch them repeatedly in the kidneys till they wet themselves anyway. b) Sprinkle them with babydust and send them hugs and kisses on lickle baby angel wings.

er........a........

5. Is R2D2: a) an adorable robot from Star Wars. b) the source of all evil.

b.........

6. what colour are your walls?

various shades of tester pot. recently moved and deciding what colours i want.

7. Number of pets?

2 smelly bin raiding labradors

8. Inappropriate (read: weird) crush of shame?

Alan Rickman

9. Lesbian crush?

Dita Von Teese

10. What are your views on camping?

i have three tents and a campervan. I frequent festivals during a british summer. I have just reached the stage where a blow up mattress is making onto the shopping list for this summer.

11. How much money have you spent on sticks you then urinate on? i) Oh nothing, I'll probably catch first time and then get the doctor to confirm it. ii) Over 100 quid iii) I opened an account on ebay solely for the purpose of purchasing sticks

nothing yet. Last time i didn't have a regular cycle and so spent a fortune. This time i'll be more relaxed about it. yeah right........

am i in?

Hello, queenrollo. You get brownie points for initiative in finding the quiz, but minuses for using the tnt word. Seriously. Cmping and all variations thereof are known to bring on the droid.

chim quiz please!

i did not know this about outdoor summer accommodation. i shall refrain from discussing it in here then

Ah, you'll fit right in if you can stay away from the c*mping references.

Now did we scare chim000 off?