TTC number 3 aged 42

[FiB83]

Hi

Not really sure what I'm looking for here but if nothing else I'll use this as a diary of my feelings etc. I joined a chat years ago for my first pregnancy and am still friends with some of those lovely ladies so hoping to find some people who are on their TTC journey and we can share experiences l.

As the title suggests I'm 42, I have two beautiful children aged 7 and 9, we decided to try for another baby a year or so again, I needed to lose some weight so did that although I'm still overweight according to my BMI but you know how it is... I'm fairly average at a size 14-16. I still have very regular cycles and don't believe I'm anywhere near the menopause yet....

Anyways, I'm 9dpo I think, I don't do opk or anything like that, tried one month but didn't enjoy feeling obsessed over it and it didn't work anyway..I feel I know my body quite well and am aware of the signs of when I'm ovulating if I am. With our first child it took a good 2 years with one chemical pregnancy in that time before.ewe actually got our baby. With our second child...well we thought about trying and then I was pregnant... Amazing how that happens isn't it!?

So here I am, 9dpo and with virtually no discharge at all. 2 days ago I had a huge amount of white cm that was abit stretchy. I've had a headache on and off and been soooo unbelievably emotional. This isn't normal for me but we are going through quite a bit with our youngest and other normal life events so may be that I suppose. I've had sore breasts and I swear they are bigger if that is even possible!.maybe just very slight cramps over the past couple of days but that maybe only.when I'm thinking about it...

Anyone else at this stage and fancy a buddy to compare notes? I'd love to chat.

Morning all. Just catching up as was really busy yesterday, were having work on our garden and found our retaining wall is about to collapse! Sorting out insurance etc is proving difficult...

Anyways...af is due tomorrow I tested bfn yesterday not sure if to bother testing today or not... Hubby is convinced I'm pregnant though no idea why he thinks that.
@Bumblebee413 I am always going from wanting a third to doubting it and thinking we should be happy with 2. Especially with our youngest needing an sen school etc. Im also thinking I want o go back on weight loss injections as I'm not at all happy with my size and want to be fitter as well but am aware there's a risk with that. It all feels like it has to happen now or never because of my age, I I absolutely hate that feeling

@FiB83 oh no what a headache with the wall, what happens now do u have to knock and rebuild it? Sorry that’s such a stress on top of everything.

I tested a bfn this morning also, I really don’t think there’s much chance of testing positive now after a negative at 12 dpo 😕

my RHR had a dip 2 days ago but has been back on the rise since and up into the 60s today 🤷🏼‍♀️ unless the slim chance that I implanted on day 10 but I seriously doubt it. Kinda just want af to arrive now if it’s coming so I can get on with the next cycle.

on good news LO did a full night with oh last night so no feeding at all, feels so weird but we might be finally getting there. I just hope it does mess up my cycle now for this month

how’s everyone else getting on with testing or at other stages in cycle?

@FiB83sorry about the garden wall, that sounds a nightmare! Bricklaying is expensive also.

My spotting stopped yesterday. I’m technically due on period today, I am bloated and crampy so think it is coming. I seem to have these weird cycles since having my first where I sometimes spot/sometimes don’t before my period. Does anyone else get that?

Yeh it's gonna have to have the entire wall removed and rebuilt and will cost between 15-19k!! Hoping insurance will pay out but they will try to get out of it I think.

@BurningOutt how are you getting on??

I tested and bfn. I'm seriously thinking of just doing 3 months on juniper and then see where I'm at.

@FiB83depending on how far gone it is, if insurance doesn’t pick it up, you can consult someone about bracing the wall with metal brackets and putting some blockwork (much cheaper) behind the bricks

Hi all @FiB83 thank you for the check in and I’m so sorry about the bfn and the wall - what a pain. What is juniper?

Ive really been through it - had sudden excruciating pain on Thursday and ended up in A&E with suspected ectopic. Turned out to be massive internal bleeding from a ruptured ovarian cyst but small visible sac seen in the uterus. So emergency surgery to sort the bleeding and good news is they saved the ovary and tube and pregnancy hopefully ok as well, though time will tell on that front as does increase chance of mc.

At this point I’m just glad to be alive though. Hope everyone else is ok!

Oh my goodness @BurningOutt that sounds terrifying!! So glad you’re ok and keeping everything crossed for your little bean 🤞🏼

@FiB83 that sounds like a nightmare and really not the stress you need! Sorry about the bfn x

@DmcinT sorry to you too but great news about your LO and even if it messes up your next cycle, it might increase your chances after that so definitely focus on the positive 😊

My period arrived this morning, at least it didn’t keep me waiting but uuugh!! Here we go again and my due date would be Dec 25th if this is the successful month

@BurningOutt oh god that was a scary few days no doubt but also so lovely to know there’s officially a little bean there cooking away 🥰 please god all goes ok 🤞🏽

@Sa11yCinnamon yeah I’m hoping it increases our chances, even though my periods and ovulation have all been very regular and seem fine for a long time now but I never know perhaps the prolactin is interfering in some way!

@FiB83 what is juniper?

@BurningOutt that is so scary, hope you’re feeling okay now, and fingers crossed everything is okay x

@DmcinTsorry about period arriving, it’s always rubbish. But very glad last night went okay with your toddler!

Started spotting just now, never used to get this but did last cycle too

I’m a day late now, and no cm at all. Spotting stopped a couple of days ago. But if pregnant I’d expect creamy cm by now. I don’t have a test to confirm either way, and going out for the day later so won’t have an opportunity to buy one

Thanks for this. The wall is about as bad as it can be without actually collapsing unfortunately. It's at a 30 degree angle from the floor!

@BurningOutt wow sounds terrible I'm glad you're ok and that your little bean in is hanging on as well!

AF has arrived this morning, I'm really torn with everything ATM I want to lose about 2 stone, juniper is the weight loss medications I could sign up for 3 months but then you shouldn't be TTC when on it

@january1244 how did u get on, did u test?

@FiB83 sorry about AF, we’re in the same boat again and with a Christmas due date this time, I would be C-section between 38-39 weeks though so would just about miss Christmas week.
it’s funny u mention weight, do u find ttc has had an impact? I’ve put on around a stone since we start ttc in sept last yr. I know it’s my own fault really, I exercise and eat normally for the first 2 weeks of cycle and then in tww I kinda avoid too much exercise and eat what I want because I think ah sure if I’m pregnant I’ll be getting big anyways but it’s definitely resulted in me putting on a pound or 2 each month so here I am 7/8 months later with a stone on and really feel it 😕

@BurningOutt do u have another scan booked in now or what did they say would be the next steps for monitoring the pregnancy ?

@FiB83ah yes it sounds like it’s way past bracketing! Sorry.

@DmcinTi was out yesterday with friends so didn’t test, but I have started spotting today so think my period is coming and just a couple days late. To be honest it’s probably the miscarriage messing my cycles up a little bit still 🤷‍♀️

I know what you mean, I need to tone up after losing the baby weight, but then why putting all of that effort if you’re just going to get big again anyway 😫

@DmcinTsounds similar to me. My issue is I’m not liking my body as I feel it has let me down with all the losses in quick succession. I rejoined the gym in December but have barely been since
I’m definitely out this month as period arrived last night

Thanks all and sorry for the recent bfns. I’ve got another scan in about 10 days so will see what’s going on in there. Not getting my hopes up but will see. I can’t believe I worried about things like drinking coffee in the first few weeks when I’ve now had surgery and all the drugs that come with a GA and pain relief plus the stress on my body etc etc.

@FiB83 it’s a tricky one - not sure id want to take cycles off at this stage- would a healthier diet and gentle exercise maybe be a halfway house as compared to the injections?

BFN for me this morning at 10 DPO, but I’m on cycle day 23 and no AF yet so that’s a positive.

@BurningOutt this is so true, I was beating myself up about having 2 coffees some days last cycle and have vowed to stick to one a day for this cycle but those things prob make no difference really! Well I hope all goes smoothly now, I’d say the wait for the scan is tough going though.

@TheFutureIs yeah it’s such a tricky one because I know I should be fitter/ healthier but just feel like what’s the point in all that effort if I’m just gona be pregnant. I’ve gone from roughly a size 10 to a 12 and can feel myself expanding as the months go on, literally none of my clothes fit so I’m having to buy new ones 🫣 maybe the better weather will give me the kick up the ass I need as none of my summer clothes will fit 😫

We also haven’t booked a summer holiday yet as we were waiting to see and I didn’t want to go anywhere if I was too pregnant but I think I’ll book something now soon as even if this cycle was successful I’d only be 4-5 months over the summer.

Oh god I hadn’t even considered holidays! Last year we were still in our happy little bubble having seen “Jeff” on a scan with a heartbeat at 8 weeks. Happiest summer of my life

Yeah I agree, we should live our lives as normal, and not stress about little things like coffee or a glass of wine. Makes it miserable when trying. Did anyone read Emily Oster? She looks into the research and studies behind various ‘advice’ and debunks a lot. Eg the studies on coffee show it would been to be 6-8 cups of coffee a day to have any effect. So I have that second coffee after lunch! And I have that glass of wine in the 2WW.

My problem is I lost the weight, about 4 lbs to go maybe. But after the 2nd I just look soft and untoned 😩 can’t be bothered to get it sorted out for the summer, but I need to

Sorry for all the recent bfns.
I feel the same re coffee and wine. I really don’t think a little will make any difference to the outcome and you can’t put your life on hold totally. I remember doing that when we were trying for the first. I gave up anything I thought might harm my fertility and didn’t book any holidays, ended up miserable after 2 years ttc and ended up with ivf anyway! It’s hard not to get carried away with doom googling things that might help or hinder!

I am on cycle day 32 now. 🫠 not sure what’s going on with my body. We only dtd 5 days before ovulation so I am pretty sure i wont be pregnant and really dont want to see another negative test but i think i will probably test in the morning if it hasn’t arrived.

Totally agree re coffee and wine! I started Emily Oster's book when pregnant with my first, largely to justify my own behaviour 😂 but didn't get round to finishing it.

I'd add that we weren't TTC then and LOTS of both had been consumed, DS is absolutely fine.

Well girls I am only cycle day 7 but had some twinges and pain on left side and a bit of cm today so out of interest I did an opk, now it’s still low but it’s at 0.35.
im usually down in the teens or maybe low 20’s and only start going into 30’s or 40’s a day or 2 before I get peak so I think it could be starting to rise, now it could easily be another day or 2 before peak and again a day or 2 before ovulation but I reckon stopping breastfeeding has given my estrogen a bit of a spike and follicles might be ready earlier this cycle meaning I could potentially ovulate earlier (maybe around day 10-12)

Maybe I’m wrong, who knows! Anyone else stop breastfeeding and notice earlier ovulation?

Crossposting but keen for thoughts, is this line too faint for 13 DPO?

Looks good to me! Congrats!