IVF Buddies: the next chapter

[RunningOnHope]

Hi everyone, thought I'd try making us a second thread now the old one is done -

Tagging @Triselly @lemons44 @CR7 @Flowerlover010 @pongom @WholeZebra @TheBirdintheCave @SarahShorty - will go back to the thread and see if there's anyone else to add in, but do tag those I've missed!

@RunningOnHope My AF came today so my baseline is on Monday 😬 I'm so excited I finally get to have a transfer soon 😂

Hey @charja100 and @TheBirdintheCave so nice to see you - excited for us all! And also, obviously, dreading the 2WW for all of us. I think I actually lost the plot last time.

@RunningOnHope @charja100 @TheBirdintheCave so excited for you all. And yes the tww is awful but you've done it before and we will all be here to support you xx

@TheBirdintheCave yay! Excited for you!

@CR7 that sounds like the NHS to me, bloody useless 🙄 Very happy to hear the NIPT came back clear.

I've started bleeding having come off all the medications and I'm trying naturally this time. Will also try naturally in August I think because I'm so sick of IVF now and just want to take a break. I'm not so worried about time anymore considering 17 months has flown by and I'll be 36 this year. If it's not meant to be, it's not meant to be, It's not worth stressing and potentially ruining any chances I have left. DH and I have been arguing more recently, everyone around us has children, everywhere we look there's a child, though of course it's summer and the weather's nice so everyone and their kids are coming out and enjoying it. I feel like we're going to end up as genealogical dead ends. I'm actually beginning to hate my in-laws a lot for how much easier they had it. They don't know about us doing IVF. "Just relax" they say, makes me want to punch them.

@SarahShorty people are full of shitty advice that they think is helpful. All your thoughts are valid and I've exactly the same thoughts. I'm glad you're taking a break. You have time on your side (as I am mid forties I didn't) to recover and rebuild and spend some quality time with your husband xx

Hi all,

I'm new here, so saying hello.

I'm a just-turned 32-years old Brit living in Copenhagen, working my way through fertility treatment to TTC our first child. Diagnosis: unexplained infertility.

We've been TTC seriously (ovulation tests, etc) since last May, and have had 2 failed medicated IUIs using Gonal-F in April and May. Our 3rd and final one is next week. First one I got 4 follicles, but nothing stuck. Second one I only managed one follicle, and it unsurprisingly failed too. This time, I'm been prescribed 75 of Gonal-F, up from 62.5. But I'm not optimistic.

Next up is IVF. I'm on the waiting list now for publicly-funded IVF, which is around 5-6 months. I'm entitled to 3 funded cycles. Public sector here is great, so success rates aren't a big concern.

I'm torn between going private and starting IVF in July, or waiting for the public sector treatment, which may not be until January. Any recommendations from anyone here? I'm still relatively young, but as we all know, there are zero guarantees when it comes to fertility 😓

For what it's worth, private sector costs around 6000 GBP for 3 cycles. Medication is partially covered by the public health system still, luckily, so that'd be around 100-150 GBP/cycle on top.

Hello @Copenhagener - fellow Brit living in Scandinavia!

I think it depends on how comfortable you are financially and whether you don’t mind waiting a while or not. Being that you are only 32, if I were you I think I’d probably wait for the funded cycles but I think we all understand here if you would prefer not wait until next year.

We went privately and I did find it was a real sting when our first cycle failed, on top of the heartbreak it feels like you’ve just wasted tens of thousands of kroner on absolutely nothing, so there is that too xx

Thanks for the welcome! Are you in Denmark, Sweden or Norway?

Thanks for your thoughts, and I’m so sorry your first cycle didn’t work out. Are you still in treatment now?

I’m considering waiting for the funded cycles, and if they all don’t work out, then going private for 3 more and hoping it’s a numbers game.

We should get a treatment start date by the end of July, so dependent on that, I’ll make my decision. We do have the money, but of course I’d also be pretty devastated spending it and getting nothing if it doesn’t work out.

@RunningOnHope @charja100 @TheBirdintheCave fingers crossed for you all 🤞🏻

@SarahShorty

Take all the time you need 🫶
This IVF journey is hard I haven’t even started my medication and I’m finding it hard so I can only imagine what it feels like on the other side.
I hope everything works out for you, keeping everything crossed for you.

@CR7 Amazing news on the results of NIPT sad to hear about your urine infection, hope you’re feeling better?

@Copenhagener welcome!

Hope you are all enjoying the lovely sunshine. X

@CR7 @RunningOnHope @wish1 thank you 🙏🏼

@Copenhagener welcome to the thread.

@SarahShorty I'm so sorry you've got that to contend with. This journey is hard enough without support. I feel your pain and it can be so hard to deal with situations when your in pain for something you want so badly. Be king to yourself and take the time you need. We're all here to listen.

@cr7 I'm so pleased for you and your NIPT results 💕

@Wish1 @charja100 the antibiotics have defo kicked in so feeling a little better for sure. Thank you both 💋💋

@charja100 the NIPT was a massive milestone for us as I'm 42. And even though the pgta screens, it doesn't diagnose. So pleased I went private and found out now rather than worry for the next 6 weeks until the nhs would test me xx

@CR7 Ooh I missed that! Great news re the NIPT 😬

Thank you!! Xx

Hi all, I’ve been absent for a while! Currently on day 8 of stims. Have another scan tomorrow to check my follicles and hopefully collection on Wednesday! I’m absolutely terrified.

Not feeling overly positive - we had a scan on Friday and there were 27 follicles, but not all great sizes. And then on our way home we were involved in a 4 car collision - leaving us with no car. Stressed about getting to appointments this week now… Not what we need.

Oh my goodness @WholeZebra are you ok?? What a horrible stress on top of everything! I’m so sorry to hear that!

@Copenhagener I’m in Norway so there aren’t any funded cycles, only reimbursement for the meds after a while. We’re just waiting to start the next cycle and have to sort out some funding stuff with the clinic, but probably should be end of July or August.

Hope everyone is having a good weekend! Xx

@WholeZebra How are you doing? The crash sounds so scary :(

Thanks @Triselly and @TheBirdintheCave! been doing okay, still having a headache and back hurts a bit. Finally got a car today so that will make life easier!

Had a scan yesterday - was hoping it would be our last with plans of trigger being yesterday evening, follicles weren’t where they wanted them so had to have two more days of stims. Another scan tomorrow now. Fingers crossed for egg collection Friday!

@WholeZebra That's frustrating but I'm glad they're being thorough with their monitoring so you'll have the best chance of lots of eggies :)

@WholeZebra what an ordeal with all that extra stress you really didn't need! That must be such a relief to have the car now. I hope the back ache goes soon.

Although disappointing it's great they've adjusted your protocol to ensure that you get the most and best egg collection results possible. I have everything crossed for you for you scan tomorrow and collection on Friday!

Hi gang xx sorry for the radio silence. Had a busy few days! Infection almost gone thank goodness. Had my twelve week scan which was amazing. Baby was wiggling and waving and messing around haha! Nuchal all good which we knew from the NIPT. All drugs apart from steroids have now stopped so very excited to feel a bit more like myself. Measuring slightly ahead so they have moved my due date by a few days.

How is everyone else doing?

@WholeZebra omg. What a nightmare. Glad you've got beck in the car. That's a huge hurdle

Has anyone else received negative responses when they’ve told people they’re going through treatment?

I told 3 friends, and have 3 bad reactions.

One hasn’t replied at all after a week, one said if you’re going to have kids, it should happen ‘naturally’ and that I should take it as a sign I shouldn’t force it and maybe no child is for the best, and the last one just went on about how stressful it is for him having 3 kids, and why don’t I just ‘relax’ and it’ll happen, before changing the topic. I also overheard some colleagues at lunch talking about a friend of theirs who’s suffering with infertility, and saying they don’t want them around their kids birthday party because it’s weird.

I feel really saddened. I know there’s a lot of misunderstanding around IVF, but I didn’t know there was this level of stigma - especially in our 30s!

I won’t be telling anyone else, but I feel a bit alone that no one is willing to talk about it a bit, or provide even the smallest bit of empathy. I’m estranged from my family, so I really am going through this completely alone except for my partner.

@CR7 Congrats on the amazing scan! :D That's one huge hurdle passed now.

@Copenhagener Gosh they don't sound like friends at all :( I'm really sorry they had those reactions.

@Copenhagener I'm so sorry to hear xx echoing @TheBirdintheCave with her words.

I was met with - you're so strong, you must really want this, I'm sad it's not so easy for you.

We are all here for you and we are all proud of you xx

Thank you so much. I’m trying not to take it personally, but gosh it’s hard not to. At least my acupuncturist is nice about it!

I’m so glad you received positive and supportive reactions.