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Original poster

IVF April 2023 - looking for buddies!

1000 replies

Triselly · 25/03/2023 17:21

Anyone out there starting/continuing IVF treatment next month (April 2023)?

I’m 36, first time everything, and due to start stims early April. Wondering if there are others who might like a thread to chat/vent?

If you’re out there and in a similar position, let me know!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
16
lemons44 · 27/04/2023 21:03

Well done @TheBirdintheCave ! First one is the hardest so you'll be on a roll now you've got that one out the way.

We had pizza yesterday 🤣 we should make pizza our IVF symbol instead of a pineapple

RunningOnHope · 27/04/2023 21:15

@lemons44 pineapple! I knew there was something I'd forgotten today. On my way to the fridge now 😂

CR7 · 28/04/2023 00:02

@RunningOnHope no judgement whatsoever. My opinion is to wait. One week is only half way through the wait. Try to get to day ten if you can. Just to give the test more of a chance of accuracy

Only a blood test will be accurate up to eight days post transfer so please wait if you can to avoid a mis result and feeling happy or sad too early xx

CR7 · 28/04/2023 00:03

Well done @TheBirdintheCave ♥️♥️♥️

Flowerlover010 · 28/04/2023 06:01

@charja100 thank you, its a long journey isnt it, none of us know how long for! I hope you are ok.

@TheBirdintheCave well done! Its been so long since my needle training i worry i will get it right for each one!

I got my treatment schedule yesterday and im starting the stims 20th may, EC hopefully 1st june. All leading up to egg collection i have 53 injections to do over 5 weeks (didnt count or anything🤣) and my worry is now that the first one was actually the easiest and its actually going to get harder for me since i will be like a pin cushion! And get sore. I keep looking at my belly thinking can i find 53 spots to inject without it hurting 🤣 oh fun and games!

TheBirdintheCave · 28/04/2023 08:30

@Flowerlover010 53?? :O I deliberately didn't count mine 😂

lemons44 · 28/04/2023 09:20

Is there such a thing as 'ivf brain' like baby brain?!!! Im on my way to my 2nd scan and travel by train. I just stood on the platform whilst my train pulled up and stayed in the platform for five mins and then departed... all whilst I stood staring the wrong way 🫤
I'm blaming the drugs!!!!

Flowerlover010 · 28/04/2023 09:54

@lemons44 omg my brain has been the worst! I put it down to stress!

TheBirdintheCave · 28/04/2023 10:07

@lemons44 Oh no! Will you still make it in time?

My husband has been told he has to come back to work after our scan on Tuesday. His work are very unsupportive despite his manager having been through the IVF process with his wife 🙄 He's been told 'Can you book the scan for 9am so you won't be too late for work?' and 'You'll have to take holiday days to cover any further appointments' and, my personal favourite, 'You should have done IVF in Epsom like we did as it would have been more convenient.'

Yes, it would have, but also it would have been £2k more expensive and they refuse to pay my husband the grade 6 wage (despite him doing grade 6 work) so we can't afford that 😤

Our clinic is in London and is a two hour round trip from our house (not including time spend waiting for trains). We're not getting back home until about 2pm and then my poor husband will have to drive for 45 minutes to work to stay for two hours before coming home again.

lemons44 · 28/04/2023 10:38

So I did make my scan!

I suddenly feel a bit overwhelmed as they are moving my egg collection from next Wednesday to Monday and I need to trigger tomorrow night! It's gone so quickly!! 😬

The super big bad boy follicle that was 20mm is now confirmed as a cyst because it has now got to 28mm 😩 it's made me super worried but they said it's fine and they will drain it when they collect my eggs. They said cysts can go a bit crazy when taking all these drugs.

She didn't tell me how big each follicle was but said it's looking like a good picture.

@TheBirdintheCave your OH's manager sounds like a right piece of work! What a shame that he has been through it and is still so naive!

TheBirdintheCave · 28/04/2023 10:51

@lemons44 That's so exciting! :D Also good news that they can drain the cyst whilst doing the collection. That really does sound huge!

And yeah, he's really not a very good manager. My work just say 'Ok no worries :)'.

pongom · 28/04/2023 10:59

@TheBirdintheCave that is a shame about his work. My partner had to take any appointments (except egg collection, which he had to be at to give his sample) as unpaid leave as they were classed as medical appts for me not for him. So he didn’t come to the follicle scans and only came to egg collection and embryo transfer. You might find that you feel okay to go to them alone, but it is such a shame to have unsupportive workplaces, I feel your pain!

TheBirdintheCave · 28/04/2023 11:44

@pongom I went to the last one alone and it was pretty shit sitting in the waiting room with all the other couples and then having to be internally scanned by a male doctor. There was a female nurse there too but I found it a lot more nerve wracking without my husband.

Might end up having to do the next two alone though :( I've asked husband to ask HR for a copy of their IVF policy.

SarahShorty · 28/04/2023 11:57

I feel very sorry for those with unsupportive workplaces regarding IVF. Although it's slow-going, some bigger companies have recognised that starting a family is extremely difficult and a very emotional time for some couples and have adapted as much as they can. My company is quite small in size, though they have been very supportive because if they're not, they know they will get into a lot of trouble if they're not.

The more people struggle to conceive, the more people will start to become sympathetic, because otherwise hiring people is going to get a lot harder, let's face it. Who wants to work for a company that doesn't care about employee wellbeing?

TheBirdintheCave · 28/04/2023 12:02

@SarahShorty Yeah my company are a very large global corporation and they are just excellent at making sure we all feel valued and supported. I never want to leave.

CR7 · 28/04/2023 13:04

@lemons44 it sounds like they absolutely on top of everything for you. Try to relax and keep us posted. Easier said than done x

CR7 · 28/04/2023 13:08

I had to have so many scans over my three cycles that I had to get used to doing them alone as we needed to save my husbands time off for his own tests and to be there for egg retrieval and transfer.

My company is really good at supporting me but in his job as an airplane captain it wasn't feasible for him to come to the normal routine scans. My dad actually came with for one. Eyes firmly at the wall for some of it haha. He loved being a part of it and it was actually very special to have him there.

If you're new to the process though I can imagine that it's very hard doing it alone. My first cycle was at the end of covid so my husband couldn't come to anything xx

TheBirdintheCave · 28/04/2023 13:11

@CR7 Wow he's a pilot?? That is so cool!

lemons44 · 28/04/2023 13:47

@CR7 my dad is on standby to take me to scans too. I was thinking of getting him a badge made saying 'I'm the father not the husband' lol 🤣

I have done my scans on my own so far and they've not been too bad. I actually find them a bit relaxing as the lights are all dimmed and my clinic have these nice chairs that recline back and they show me the screen and talk through everything on it as they scan. Sorry your last one wasn't a great experience @TheBirdintheCave hopefully your husbands work have an IVF policy so he can attend them all with you without being made to feel guilty for missing work!

I'm quite lucky with my workplace too. They don't have an IVF policy but they are very relaxed and allow me to work flexibly around it. It does make a big difference

CR7 · 28/04/2023 16:46

@TheBirdintheCave haha yes it's a cool job but he can't really not take 300 people on holiday to come with me so I got used to it. My clinic was super helpful and gave me a bit more priority when it came to the timings of the big stuff to give him every chance to be there, ie first or last on the list for retrieval / transfer etc so he could come. In the end he only had to tell work twice in all the years and they swapped his flight. But only when we had no other option. Three collections, three transfers and two surgeries in, and he only missed the scans. I asked the nurses if I could record our chat on my phone so he could hear when he got home and it also meant I could re listen and not forget anything once I was out of the room x

CR7 · 28/04/2023 16:47

@lemons44 I totally agree. Was fine on my own. But I was lucky that nothing unexpected came up that I needed to have someone with me for xx

Original poster
Triselly · 28/04/2023 18:32

I do feel for those of you trying to judge unsupportive work, just another layer of stress to have to deal with. Me and my husband are both self employed so been taking tons of time off. Finances are extremely tight but I do appreciate having him there!

@lemons44 that is so so exciting that your egg collection is now on Monday! I’m sorry that it sounds a bit scary with the cyst, but it sounds like your clinic have everything under control xx

@TheBirdintheCave are you able to request a female dr for your next appointments? They tried to book me in with a male dr and I made a giant fuss, and they switched me to a woman dr for everything! I just feel much more comfortable.

I hope everyone has had a good day, I’m just here chilling on the tww train, trying to keep in mind that it’s impossible to pee out an embryo (it definitely feels like it could possibly happen though 😂)

OP posts:
Original poster
Triselly · 28/04/2023 18:33

*juggle not judge in the first line!

OP posts:
TheBirdintheCave · 28/04/2023 21:00

Second stabby done 😅 Two more days before Fyremadel joins the party 😫

@CR7 Which airline does he fly for? I've always been obsessed with planes (an autistic interest!)

I think I'll just have to suck it up re scans. I'm so scared my husband will be fired if I ask him to come with me.

CR7 · 29/04/2023 11:31

@TheBirdintheCave flies for tui xx

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