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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

9 months TTC and losing hope

952 replies

BritInNZ · 01/10/2021 01:30

Hi everyone

Anyone else nearing that year mark of TTC and just feeling down and wondering when/if it will happen?

DH and I had a private fertility appointment this month and AMH and SA all good - no obvious reason why we can't conceive. We have to keep trying until January when we hit that year mark and then have more investigations.

I KNOW it can take healthy couples up to a year but it's only 3 cycles away now and I feel like I'm at the stage I don't even hope for a BFP as I know it's not coming.

I just turned 29 and DH is 31, so I know we have some time but it doesn't help when you're wondering what's going wrong.

Currently CD1 so obviously feeling a bit meh anyway, so just looking to chat to others in the same boat as I feel alone and like everyone else gets pregnant quickly ☹️ also visiting in-laws this weekend and when we booked it at the start of the year I was hoping it would be a trip to give them some good news, so that's a bit heartbreaking too.

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Original poster
BritInNZ · 22/10/2021 08:51

@FlyOnTheWall89 I don't have any OPKs sadly! And the stores are shut now. I'll just BD anyway in case it is a late ovulation 😂

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Original poster
BritInNZ · 22/10/2021 09:26

@FlyOnTheWall89 are you going to test or just wait and see if AF arrives? Fingers crossed for you!

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FlyOnTheWall89 · 22/10/2021 10:22

@BritInNZ I will wait I think. Could be anytime between today and Sunday. Monday would be usual for me so potentially will just wait until then.

LittleMysSister · 22/10/2021 10:48

@BritInNZ

Random question everyone - has anyone had EWCM way past ovulation? I'm sure I ovulated 3 or 4 days ago (this is the one month I haven't done BBT!) and today I've got a lot of EWCM?! I never usually get it at all, just watery. I'm CD22 of a 28 day cycle so I'm 99% sure it's not ovulation (going to DTD just in case 😂)
I never get EWCM Envy but I do tend to get a shed load of watery, creamy CM a couple of days after I believe I've ovulated according to OPKs. I don't do BBT though so I guess OPKs may not be as accurate.
FlyOnTheWall89 · 22/10/2021 11:18

@LittleMysSister are you taking anything to increase EWCM? It is pretty important for conception to occur because it paves the wave for the spermies and protects them on the hostile journey! x

LittleMysSister · 22/10/2021 11:22

[quote FlyOnTheWall89]@LittleMysSister are you taking anything to increase EWCM? It is pretty important for conception to occur because it paves the wave for the spermies and protects them on the hostile journey! x[/quote]
Tbh I didn't even know there were things I could take!! I'll look into that.

But I did start a thread on here a while back about it and a few people mentioned they never noticed any either but had successful become pregnant, and from Googling it seems like you may not always see it in underwear etc as it can sit higher up.

Also I learnt that it can vary in colour, where I have always been looking for totally clear as everything is always white/cream to me, so maybe I am having it but not realising!? Not convinced though.

Maybe I'll look into taking something HmmSmile.

FlyOnTheWall89 · 22/10/2021 11:40

@LittleMysSister Evening Primrose oil - google it. Lots of people have used it on these threads with great success. I don't need it so haven't personally but its another thing I have picked up over my first month on here. x

LittleMysSister · 22/10/2021 11:43

[quote FlyOnTheWall89]@LittleMysSister Evening Primrose oil - google it. Lots of people have used it on these threads with great success. I don't need it so haven't personally but its another thing I have picked up over my first month on here. x[/quote]
Thanks, I will definitely look into that :)

TheEvilPea · 22/10/2021 13:45

We tried for a year before our first child. Had just gone to the GP to start investigations when I fell pregnant. My second child was conceived on the first attempt! Don't despair - you are far from having to worry yet, it's quite normal that it can take some time the first time. Especially if either of you (or both!) is stressed, exhausted, drinking a bit much, or just for no reason at all.

Original poster
BritInNZ · 22/10/2021 17:57

@LittleMysSister I also never usually get EWCM. This month I took EPO and got some! Even if it is 4/5 days after ovulation 😂

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Rainbow78861 · 22/10/2021 20:52

Hi i'm new on here! ☺️ I've had a Missed Mc July 30ththen had covid in August to stopped trying for that month..we're trying for my 1st using OPK's this month hoping for the best 🤞🏼 before my mmc we'd only been trying 2 months remaining hopeful 🌈 i've just turned 30 and my partner is 28 is anyone else on their ttc journey 💕

Original poster
BritInNZ · 24/10/2021 20:21

Anyone else's body play tricks on them in the TWW? I've felt nauseous ALL weekend and my lower back is so sore - like my muscles have spasmed. If I feel like this again tomorrow I may have to phone in sick because I'm useless 😂 kinda hoping I'm not pregnant because if I felt like this for the next couple of months it would be HELL!

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Carla2601 · 24/10/2021 20:55

@BritInNZ YES! Last weekend I was so nauseous (like travel sickness) so gassy, had two drinks and threw up a lot. Convinced I was and then nope. BUT, am hoping a lot you get good news, keep us posted. I’m on cd7 so ready to DTD a lot 😂

Original poster
BritInNZ · 24/10/2021 22:18

@Carla2601 it's horrible isn't it! 😂 I'm not getting my hopes up because then when AF arrives it's even more miserable 😂 good luck with the fertile week! It felt like an absolute mission for me this month haha

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FlyOnTheWall89 · 25/10/2021 06:19

@BritInNZ I mean this is sounding VERY positive for you. How many DPO are you now?

I got AF. So I’m onto cycle 7, nearly bloody 8 months of actively trying. Calling the doctors today to get a blood tests done to check my eggies.

Original poster
BritInNZ · 25/10/2021 06:22

I actually didn't track BBT this month as I wanted some time off, but I'm about 7 or 8 DPO I think.

It does all look positive but also... our bodies like to play tricks on us. I've had a month like this before and AF still came 😂 so trying not to read into it too much! Still not much of an appetite and my lower back is still sore - it's like all the muscles have gone into spasm. Hopefully won't last long! Plus side is I don't feel too nauseous any more.

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Original poster
BritInNZ · 25/10/2021 06:24

@FlyOnTheWall89 sorry to hear AF arrived! I found it harder once I got over the 6 months of TTC. The AMH is all good in that it tells you how many eggs but not if they're good quality, and also might be worth asking about a sperm analysis? I think we're all quick to think it's our fault! But it's still relatively early days. Although if it helps ease your mind then I 100% agree getting some tests done.

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Carla2601 · 25/10/2021 10:26

@BritInNZ got everything crossed for you! It does get tedious doesn’t it....

Have my doctors appointment tomorrow so I’m hoping they will get things moving then either way I’ll feel I’ve made some progress this month!

FlyOnTheWall89 · 25/10/2021 10:48

@BritInNZ ye I think it’s just about knowing that everything is okay so the effort isn’t wasted. I’m taking CoQ10 super absorbent at a high dose which apparently can help egg quality - fertility clinics recommend it so figured it can’t hurt to try it. I’m 32 so not young but equally not ‘old’ in terms of fertility. Yes sperm will be tested too. Making some calls today.

Original poster
BritInNZ · 25/10/2021 18:25

@FlyOnTheWall89 hope you got somewhere with making your calls! Yeah I'm open to trying anything at this stage 😂

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Original poster
BritInNZ · 25/10/2021 19:38

@Carla2601 it really does! Feeling way more PMS today, so I think my body was just playing tricks over the weekend - standard when TTC 😂

Sorry get confused with time difference... have you had your Dr appointment yet? Let us know how it goes? I haven't even seen my Dr about it, just went straight for the private tests haha. Just because I knew he'd say to wait a few more months!

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Original poster
BritInNZ · 26/10/2021 05:32

I cracked and did a test and it's negative, not too surprised but still not the best thing to see. Got my usual pre-AF cramps starting now too, damn it!

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kmbegs · 26/10/2021 07:55

@BritInNZ sorry to hear that but if you're only 8ish DPO it probably wouldn't show yet anyway. You're not out until you're out!

We are back into the actively trying part of the cycle. Last month I didn't ovulate until day 25 so I'm bracing for an exhausting stretchConfused and really hoping I ovulate earlier this month.

Original poster
BritInNZ · 26/10/2021 07:57

@kmbegs hmm I guess but not hopeful!

Wow that's late! How long was your cycle?!

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kmbegs · 26/10/2021 08:47

I know it was sooooo long! Looking at my charts I think my body tried to ovulate twice but failed before finally ovulating on day 25. Was a 37 day cycle. I normally ovulate about day 19, which is a bit late but obviously not as bad as last month. Really hoping it was a one off. I am now on all the supplements in the world including soy iso which is meant to bring forward ovulation so fingers crossed that helps too. It's hard going. I turn 35 in two weeks as well which has got me feeling...I dunno it's just a weird marker I guess. This is our 8th cycle now.