TTC after miscarriage

[lamby12]

Hi just wondered if anyone had any experience of continuing TTC after miscarriage. I had a loss at 5/6 weeks recently. The bleeding has now stopped (about 3 days clear) and I'm starting to feel back to normal physically. Emotionally I'm gutted as we have been trying for so long and a few close relatives who know have said we should wait a while to recover emotionally/physically.
Whilst I agree, I've also read that you're most fertile after a miscarriage and it's taken 18months of inconsistent ovulation/low hormones for me to get pregnant. I don't want to miss what could be an increased chance when my odds are low ordinarily.
The hospital said I should wait until a normal period for dating reasons only, they said nothing about risk of infection or complications getting pregnant straight away. I have no idea when I would ovulate (if) now.
Any experience out there?

@AmyFr Thanks for your reply. I have not used ovulation kits. Thinking of giving it a try this month. Fingers crossed.

@amyFr the cookies were delicious! Proper new york style soft chewy cookies! Had a few too many! I am sorry AF showed up. Here is to this month! Mine has finished now but still seem to be spotting over the last two days. Planning on starting the OPK testing on Thursday. Picked up some Zinc supplement for OH as well. He reckons since Covid his testosterone has dropped as he hasnt been going to the gym and so hoping that the zinc helps with that!

@sg121 welcome to the group and so sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I do was so glad I wasnt the only one feeling the way I was and it defo made enduring it a little easier when you have someone to talk to going through a similar circumstance. 10DPO is still early, so fingers crossed for you.

@rbcoxie fingers crossed for you as well, like I said 10DPO is still early! I never got my BFP last time until 11DPO. You are 100% right, we will get our rainbow babies!

@NS15 I am so sorry about your miscarriage. I understand how difficult it is trying to recover from it but just take the time you need! I agree with Amy that the best time to DTD is usually the day of ovulation and the day before, so I would suggest DTD maybe 13th/14th/15th. I track my ovulation and my BBT so I know exactly when I ovulate, and even then I still dont catch the egg so it is very much luck!

I am feeling quite relaxed this month so far (she says, its only CD5!) But in the back of my mind, I feel quite positive about this month and I really feel like Feb might be the one for quite a few of us! Fingers crossed for us all xx

I have a friend who gave birth recently, and when she was overdue she was telling me that she doesn’t really know when she conceived as she doesn’t really track her cycles or anything. I would LOVE to be that ignorant of it. And able to conceive that easily. Oh well.

@CookieMonster3001that's great that you're feeling relaxed and stay positive for this month! I'm crossing my fingers for you.

So something weird happened this afternoon. I tested on Sat (9dpo) and it was a BFN and then I tested again today (I dread to think of the amount of money I've spent on tests since TTC!!) so today I'm 11 dpo but I tested in the afternoon and I swore there was a really really really faint line? Nothing like what I had the first time and then I've googled and found out about evaporation lines on pregnancy tests so am thinking this must be that?! It's a squinter but hubby said he could see what I was talking about (so I know I'm not completely mad LOL) I've got typical PMS symptoms (not the same as when I conceived) so am pretty certain AF will be coming so this tiny line has confused me - it's a clear blue test and the test line isn't really blue so from what I've read it could definitely be an evaporation line (which I had no idea even existed?) I'm trying really hard not to get my hopes up I will test tomorrow first thing but now this has confused me even more and I'm scared that if it's a BFN tomorrow (which it most likely is) I'll be even more upset?
Has anyone else experienced this?

For the symptoms, I read guidance from an OBGYN that it can be very hard to say for sure during the 2WW (which I took to mean - just try and chill) and often PMS / pregnancy symptoms can be very similar.

Maybe wait a day or two and test again? Hopefully it’s a BFP! If you’re 11 DPO it is still relatively early, so HCG levels could be low and harder to detect.

@SG121 I went through this too this month and it was negative. However, I also have had the faint lines where I wasn’t sure and it turned out to be positive! I feel for you. I hate faint lines / evap lines, especially when you are so hopeful. I am a bit dubious of clear blue as I’ve had a bad evap line from them before (which was 100% negative on other brands) so I always try to use a pink dye now. Perhaps pick up one if it’s still not clear? Sorry, that’s not helpful! I would try a FRER if you can get one. I will have my fingers crossed for you! Hopefully it is the start of a BFP!

@Absy oh gosh! I know! I can’t ever “see what happens!” I temp and use OPKs 😂 if only!

@CookieMonster3001 ooh the cookies sound amazing! And the supplements sound good too - fingers crossed for you! And fingers crossed February is an amazing month!

@SG121 i also had the same thing this month. I used easy@home hcg tests and afterwards found out that they are super bad for evap lines. 10DPO it was stark white neg and when I looked back at it an hour later there was a line. I took a test 11dpo 12dpo and 13dpo and all of them had the exact same line. Having said that, I had super faint line the month I got my bFP. Did the line come up within the timeframe? If it did, theres a likely hood its positive (fingers crossed!!) If like me it came up after the timeframe then its most likely an evap. Do keep us informed!! Fingers crossed for you lovely.

@Absy thata crazy I dont think I could ever be that ignorant too!! My old manager messaged me and told me she was pregnant. She had always said she never wanted kids and she said she managed to get pregnant by accident!! I mean I know it happens but it was a lil stab in the heart when she told me!

@Absy @AmyFr @CookieMonster3001 Thanks girls - yeah will wait and test again in a couple of days (or tomorrow as I know what I'm like) and I might try and pick up a red dye test too. Not getting my hopes up though. Nice to hear I'm not the only one - it's so bizarre! I know I envy the girls that don't seem to obsess - I couldn't imagine just 'seeing what happens'!!

I had to go back to the ACU this afternoon to have blood tests, and it was weirdly emotional. I didn’t expect that at all. I had the blood tests in the recovery room, and I was sat opposite the bed I had been in to recover from egg retrieval and it all just hit me again. I’ve been relatively ok for days. I didn’t expect that at all.

@Absy sending you virtual hugs. I think with any trauma, reminders will be hard. They kind of sneak up on you. Give yourself time to grieve. It’s so so hard.

I’m having a rough day but my period is heavy, there’s other general life stress, and I feel very close to the point of just too overwhelmed. I’m sure it is normal. Miscarriage and TTC sucks.

🤗 Hang in there.

Thanks AmyFr. That sounds really sucky. Hopefully it lets up soon!

I think what’s hard with TTC is that it’s constant, it’s something that’s always going on in the back of your mind, even when you’re trying to not think about it. It’s just an extra drag on your mind.

With the visit, the ACU also hs a very particular smell so it triggers memories as soon as you walk in.

@Absy Sending lots of love to you - yeah I think being in certain places and the smells etc can definitely trigger memories so I'm really sorry. Were the blood tests to test your HCG levels? I had to go back to the EPU 3 times to take my bloods and it wasn't nice. X

@AmyFr Really sorry to hear you're having a rough day - it's definitely normal so don't beat yourself up - like Absy said it's a constant and it's hard! We definitely know how you feel. X

Thanks SG121

It was for other hormone levels. I have PCOS so the fertility consultant suggested in my last appointment that they test for levels of a certain hormone (begins with A, I can’t remember the name). People with PCOS can have higher levels of it, but as you age it drops and the thinning now is that you need to supplement it as you’re used to higher levels. They’re checking in case I need to take this hormone to help with conceiving

@Absy big hugs for you, that must have been hard.

@AmyFr I really hope your day improves. Typical life, when something hits everything hits all at once. Hopefully your AF will calm down soon.

I've been having splitting headaches since last Thursday and I think its the maca root I have been taking, so haven't taken any today to see if that's what it was.

Hi all, can I tentatively join in? (I'm still definitely on the anxious side of the fence about trying again). I had a mmc early December. Cd11 now and we've decided to just go with the flow so to speak. Not going to get obsessive about tests etc. But due on again on 15th. Wishing you all luck!

Hello ladies, just marking my place here. I’m keeping my fingers crossed for all of you ttc. I had a miscarriage last week and am eager to try again, this thread has really helped me with working out in my head when is best for me to ttc again so thank you.

@Tealchoc im in the same position as you, well my bleeding started the 9th jan ended arounf the 11th. Every since the 16th we have been dtd. I spoke to my doc last week and told her and she was fine with it. Problem is i have no idea when im due on or ovulating. I had 2 days last week of pain /twinges but no bleeding. I no when im due on i get bloated and migraine a day before. So ive ive not had AF in next week/10days i will be doing a test xx

@SG121 thibk you. I hope you’re doing ok. Have you held off testing?

@Absy I hope it helps and you get more answers.
Memories are so powerful and so easily triggered by senses. My Grandad died 18 years ago and if I smell a certain perfume I am taken right back to that moment. It is strange.
I hope you’re ok tonight.

@Tealchoc I’m sorry to hear you miscarried so recently. Thinking of you. Be kind to yourself.

@dippyegg32 welcome too and I’m sorry to hear about your loss as well. I said I wasn’t sure about trying again so soon (but I tried before AF) and would see what happens but it turns out I minded a lot. It’s an emotional rollercoaster. All we really can do is see what happens and try not to obsess. I will have fingers crossed for you.

I hope you all sleep well. I feel a tiny bit better this evening and AF is less raging thankfully. Onwards and upwards!

Thanks all for the kind messages. The only people who know we had a miscarriage are medical staff so it helps to talk about it.

Welcome @dippyegg32 and @Tealchoc
So sorry for your losses and I hope everything goes well for you

Welcome @dippyegg32 @Tealchoc and @Emmav2020 really sorry to hear about your losses. It definitely helped me reading through posts like these and talking to people. Sending lots of love x

@Absy it sounds like you'll have answers which is always helpful! It definitely helps to talk about it and with people who understand. X

@AmyFr I tested yesterday and got a BFP! The line on clearblue early was still so faint so I did a digital which said 1-2 weeks! I didn't want to post yesterday as I didn't and still don't feel like it's real and am still feeling really cautious. It's weird - I don't feel like I did the first time because I think I'm just too scared to get excited incase it happens again? Lots of emotions. Hope you're feeling better today and fingers crossed this month is your month X

I think i have a dodgy pack of opks! The control line is never particularly dark/solid albeit still definitely coloured if that makes sense. Therefore the other line doesn't reach such strong colours either. It's like everything is relatively lighter. Previous ones I've used the control line is particularly prominent. Is that a thing?!

@SG121 oh yay! Sending whispered congratulations. I get the mixed feelings totally, and I will have my fingers crossed that you have a sticky bean. 🤗

@dippyegg32 I’ve had a dodgy one like this before and just used another! What app are you using? Is it helpful?

@AmyFr this is Premom. It's ok I prefer natural cycles but it's a way to see line changes

@SG121 congratulations! I’m not surprised that you’re feeling cautious. I hope it all goes well for you this time around

@AmyFr @Absy thank you both - we will see. Waiting until I'm past when AF is due too as it's still so early. Hope you're both feeling OK today x