Preconception planners - still planning

[Bells3032]

Hi all. thought i'd make a new thread as the old one getting close to a thousand. Don't forget to rejoin!!

Hi ladies,

It’s nice to have found this group. I’m 30 and my husband is 34. We decided back in May that we would ttc in January 2021 and at the moment that is still the plan. Now that’s getting nearer, I’m starting to think about it in reality! Bit nerve wracking but seems like the right time to start. I’m aware it might take a few months. I thought I would get Christmas out of the way then have a clean start, ie only a rare glass of wine from then!

Welcome @French2020!! Ny original plan was December but now I'm impatient and it will probably be from next month

@gems05 that sounds like a sensible plan. Sorry to hear about the job. Hopefully an exciting opportunity for you both though. Are you moving or buying a new home?

Well..I'm still not meant to be trying cause of my cruise, but took an OpK yesterday which was negative so we DTD without condoms. I'm sure it will be fine as I've got no signs at all of ovulation from OPK or BBT. But it was CD15 so should have been when I ovulated in a normal world. One time will be fine, I'm sure. Condoms just aren't for us!

@AMS19 thanks, we took the bullet last month to move out of my in-laws and rent again seeing as we wouldn't be able to get a mortgage until our new jobs anyway. We've been at in-laws for 15mths, got along well enough (surprisingly!) but it was enough.
The house rented now is typically the one we'd be looking at for a new build. it's only 18mths old and hoping the landlord sells to us when we get our redundancy packages and the mortgage approval? 🤞🤞

@gems05 ah that would be amazing if you can end up buying what you are already renting. That is a real try before you buy! We are currently in a 2 bedroom flat. It is absolutely huge, over 1000 Square foot, so plenty of room for a baby, and has huge outside space - a massive terrace and separate balcony because it is the penthouse - but I now really want a house. Especially now we don't have the commute everyday from working from home all the time. It will be great for you if you have the baby and dont actually have to move!

Hi everyone! I'm getting the coil removed tomorrow ready to start TTC I think December or January. Ideally we wanted to try and avoid an August baby and aim for September/October earliest. I know it's a bit silly to be planning since it's our first time TTC so no idea how long it will take! Currently my Ovia app says I'm ovulating around the first week of each month. Stupid question but does anyone know how to work out due dates for a future date? Trying to determine what due date conceiving first week of December would be compared to first week of Jan!

Hi @MayDay27

Here you go:

perinatology.com/calculators/Due-Date.htm

Thats super exciting! I also wanted to avoid August and have a Sept baby but I'm gonna start form October and just bank that it will take a few months to actually happen 🤷‍♀️

@AMS19 that's brilliant thank you for the link! Looking at that I think we will start beginning of January, just want the next three months to speed up now!! Good luck with your journey!

Haha, I love to see how many people try to avoid August I'm guessing we're all in England? I've read a bit about school starting ages and it sounds like we're one of the strictest countries for it. I feel that if it wasn't for the school year there'd be a lot more babies planned for August. I'd actually love an August baby (if it wasn't for the fact they'd be the youngest in the year). Having said that... I mentioned earlier that my DS was due mid October but actually arrived almost 7 weeks early on 30th of August... so with the best planning in the world it's still a roll of the dice

I'm still hoping to TTC in January. DH is adamant not until February though. I do think he's worried about history repeating itself which is understandable.

My weight loss took a bit of a back seat this week as we all got hit with a really bad cold. DH had a temperature of 38.7C at one point so has done a test for Covid. I didn't get the temperature spike but did develop a cough so I've done one too. We're all feeling much better now though, so back to losing weight and fingers crossed our tests come back negative.

Currently 6lbs down, 13lb until I'm at my pre-pregnancy weight and 20lb until I'm at my target weight. So hopefully about 10 weeks. Should keep me busy and keep my mind off TTC!

@Curiosity101 yes it's just avoiding August so they wouldn't be the youngest! I know it probably doesn't make much difference at all but I think if it's just waiting an extra month then we'll wait. I'd also love an August baby otherwise! Both me and the DH have Oct birthdays and have always enjoyed that time of year. We're trying to stay fit running during the week and I think I'm going to start taking folic acid over the next couple of months just so I feel like I'm doing something! Glad you and your DH are on the mend!

I know it probably doesn't make much difference at all but I think if it's just waiting an extra month then we'll wait.

@MayDay27 We had the exact same conversation when planning our DS. I also liked that it meant I wouldn't be pregnant over Christmas and New Year. They're some of my favourite times of the year and the idea of being in the first trimester then didn't sound like a fun plan.

I know what you mean about feeling like you're doing something. Getting back to my pre-pregnancy weight was the minimum I needed to do, but I'm aiming for the extra half a stone for good measure . It's nice to have something to focus on and keep me occupied.

Once I've lost the weight I'll be working on my core and aerobic fitness. I walk quite a bit, 10-12k steps most days, but I don't really do any proper exercise. Where do you run?

@Curiosity101 just been talking to the DH and now wondering whether to wait until Feb to be safer! But four months seems so much longer than three!! I've been trying to do a quick run in the morning before work just near my house. I've never been a runner but started during lockdown!

😄 It's difficult isn't it? Cause you don't know how long it'll take either. 🤷 Was it a joint suggestion?

Tbh you don't have to decide much in advance. When I was talking to my DH about #2 I was more trying to make sure we're on the same page. He'd always been adamant he wanted 2 close in age and I knew there were things I wanted to do before getting pregnant again. But then it turned out he was less keen than me this time! 😄

I'm really hoping my DH changes his mind about February and wants to start in January. But I'm just going to focus on being ready ASAP and then whenever he's ready we'll both be ready. 😊

I know it's just hard to know what to do, we've never tried before so no idea how easy/hard it's going to be! The DH is probably just a little more excited to start trying than I am! Although I'm much more of a planner so although he'd want to try ASAP he's happy to just stop trying not to get pregnant whereas I know I need to be planning exactly what that would mean 😂

How is everyone doing!! I have been so busy with work so just catching up on all the messages!

@butterfly5291 still have not booked anything yet, but OH just told me of a cashback deal he gets with the Marriott Hotel, so I think we are going to book that in Cheltenham as its close to the Cotswolds and then just relax! How exciting about your wedding!! Fingers crossed for you, a little flower girl for your wedding would be so cute!

@ams19 we were going to go down the airbnb route, but for 2 nights we can't be bothered so deciding on a hotel with breakfast now! I defo feel like before TTC I really never paid much attention to my cycle and now that we analyse every single part of it, its funny how confusing and crazy it makes us! I am due to ovulate on Sunday (according to apps) and I am already stressing myself out that my LH levels on my OPKs dont seem to be getting any darker!

@pebbleinthesand I think DTD everyday is fine. Me and OH have decided to do every other day until my fertile window, and then everyday until I ovulate.

@sunflowersaremyfav93 give him a couple extra red wines on Thursday!! Hope you have a lovely evening out!

@gems05 fingers crossed for you! I think that sounds like a good plan, hoping your mortgage gets approved and you both find new jobs soon!

@french2020 welcome to the group!!

@curiosity101 well done on the weight loss but sorry to hear you were not feeling well!I have heard the tests for Covid are not very pleasant, did he get the test results back?

My fertile week starts on Wednesday, and already nervous about having to DTD so much!! Need to find some material to help me get in the mood... anyone got any suggestions?? lol

@CookieMonster3001 Don't worry too much about OPKs not getting darker. I ovulated CD17 last month. CD15 they were stark white pretty much, CD16 blazing strong positive. It doesn't have to increase over a long period of time.

Thanks, trying to keep to the diet today but really not feeling it. I'm still a bit under the weather after the past week. No results for DH yet, but it turns out he was meant to register his test which is probably why he's not had results back 🙉🙈. So fingers crossed they'll be with us soon. Mine came back negative and it seemed like we had the same thing so I reckon his will be negative. The test wasn't too bad btw, not exactly pleasant but not painful or anything.

Good look with the baby marathon. You've got greater staying power than me! 🤣

Thanks @CookieMonster3001
We're waiting for the company to provide a large scale job fair thingy that we hope to be able to walk straight into a new job as theres a few warehouse developments happening near us who are prepared to take on lots of people from this current employment
I have a backup plan of driving hgv lorries if need be as there's so much work in this area...

😁

Hi ladies

Hope you all had a nice Monday.

So had my scan earlier and the lady who was doing it said that my uterus had a line right down the middle and I said if she'd ever seen one like that and she said no (lovely). So I have my call with the gynaecologist to discuss the results tomorrow morning, I'll update you all then. Hopefully they can correct it with a small procedure but yep feeling a bit deflated.. I was hoping it wouldn't be severe but turns out it's as severe as can be. 💔

@sunflowersaremyfav93 I'm sorry to see the results of your scan, it sounds like it probably came as a bit of a shock.

Hopefully, this will end up being a horrible memory soon and once you've had the procedure you can focus on starting your family. Did they give you an idea of timescales?

Starting a family can be such a harsh and unforgiving process, and you never hear about this side of things until you're in the middle of it.

@Curiosity101 I really wasn't expecting it but hopefully I can get some clarification and advice on next steps after my call tomorrow morning. I had to wait 8 weeks for this scan so I'm hoping I don't have to wait as long for the procedure (if they'll even offer it to me). It we'll see.

It really is 😢 i spent my teenage years believe I got any unprotected add would result in a baby but little did I know!!

@sunflowersaremyfav93 oh my goodness! I'm so sorry it wasn't the result you wanted. Hopefully you can get some answers quickly now xxx

@CookieMonster3001 thanks so much for the welcome :) You made me laugh with your ovulation stick story!

I hear you all about lockdown weight gain. I managed to keep on exercising throughout, but I think I underestimated just how much I’d been running around! Refocusing on diet for the last few weeks seems to have turned the tide... hopefully ;)

@sunflowersaremyfav93 best of luck with the call today. Hope it goes as well as it can!

@curiosity101 ahh OK that makes me feel better! I did my first CB test today and it was a blank circle, which I pretty much figured to be honest! Glad to hear your results came back negative, fingers crossed for your DH too.

@gems05 oh that sounds really good!! And glad you have a back up just incase. I work in recruitment at the moment, and the amount of applications I am getting for any one role is almost 3 times the average because of so many people loosing their jobs to Covid.

@sunflowersaremyfav93 Oh hun I am so sorry to hear about your uterus. Hope your call goes OK today. Whilst it isnt the answer you were hoping for, fingers crossed that its something that they can correct, and then you can focus on starting a family. In some ways, its good that you found out now, so you have some time to get it corrected before you and your OH start actively trying. Big hugs!!!

Thanks ladies, just spent the morning crying my eyes out and trying to work.

He said mine is complete septate and is sending me for an MRI to find out more, I could possible have to uteri or two cervixes (not sure the plural of cervix).. after the MRI they may need to do a procedure where I'm out to sleep and a camera is put up there and then could possibly need to be referred to a university hospital.. no solution was really discussed apparently there's so much risk that they don't like to do it but I found a thread on here and a lady was saying she had a complete septate uterus too and was considered high risk the whole time so had a scan every month or every other month but she carried until 39 weeks. So that was good.

The doc also said that this means I could potentially miscarry later on in pregnancy which makes me feel sick even typing it, I won't celebrate falling pregnant and will most likely only tell immediate family, I don't think I'll feel like I'm at a safe point even after 12 weeks. It hopefully once we know more I'll feel better? Doubt it but need to be hopeful.

My bf is upset too he's being really good and strong, we've been through an awful lot as a couple already so this is another thing to add. I'm utterly heartbroken but I mustn't lose hope. 😢💔

@sunflowersaremyfav93 oh sweetie!! Im so sorry to hear this. But here is the positive...you got this looked into super early at a young age. Which means you didn't waste years and years trying and have the absolute best chance of success!! I have no doubt with the right procedure and support you will absolute have every chance of success and you will absolutely get your baby ❤