TTC after miscarriage - January 2020

[MilsCookie]

Hello all (and late Merry Christmas!)

Looking for TTC buddies in a similar situation! 👋

In September I accidentally became pregnant. We had planned to begin TTC in Jan 2020 anyway, so we were really excited. Sadly, at my 12 week scan on 25th Nov, I found out I had had a missed miscarriage and the baby had stopped growing at about 9 weeks. The week that followed was one of the most traumatic in my life, having failed medical management and then an ERPC. All this happened whilst I was in another country.

Since then my recovery has been okay but all I can think about is wanting to be pregnant again and have been hoping and praying that my period returns soon so that we can officially start trying.

This morning I have had brown discharge and cramping, so it does feel like AF is on the way. So I guess I am going to count today as CD1 of my first official TTC cycle?

I wondered if anyone had been through anything similar and if so I am so sorry for your loss and what you had to go through. It really is a horrendous time. 💐

Anyone want to join me? 💕

@Sparkl @FireflyGirl
Thanks so much for your messages. You’re right, I shouldn’t be thinking that way but it’s hard. I can’t help thinking I should do everything differently this time but I just have to concentrate on looking after myself instead.

@Cruiser1 😂 ahhh that’s the dream, not even knowing! If only we could all have that now eh? Haha

This thread has grown massively! Hello to everyone! I’m now 9 weeks post miscarriage without a period in sight.

I also had a mini meltdown in John Lewis on Oxford Street. I tried to go down the back escalators to avoid the crowds after Christmas but ended up coming straight down into the baby department and head on with a display of the pram that I had picked. The pram is now in reduced to clear because the colour way I loved has been discontinued. If the pregnancy had progressed I would have been 2 weeks away from my 20 week scan and would have bought my dream pram at a bargain price. Instead, I had a little cry as I made my way down the rest of the escalators knowing that I would now never have the chance to get that pram. It’s so silly but it really floored me.

I’ve made a big effort after New Years to pick myself up and try and get back to “normal” and I am starting to feel better in myself. But the uncertainty of not knowing when my period will arrive or trying again is hard. I feel like I can’t get complete closure until that happens.

Wishing everyone luck, baby dust and beautiful rainbows!

@MrsB16 not silly at all, completely natural.

I'm a teacher and today taught a class with a girl called Maisie in it. That was one of my twins' names. As I did the register by breath caught in my throat. Hadn't even considered it might have this affect on me.

@TerribleImagination @Cruiser1 I'm due AF on 20th, so will be testing around the same time too.

@MrsB16 I’m sorry to hear your period hasn’t come back yet. I was also worried about this and had acupuncture after my miscarriage and to my surprise I got my period 31days after my surgery. It may we’ll be a coincidence but I have heard good things. Fingerscrossed it makes an appearance for you soon. It’s so difficult trying to get back to “normal” and not let it consume you. Sending lots of positive thoughts to you x

I can't keep up on here, just read back over everyone's new posts.
Hope everyone in their tww is managing to relax. Already dreading being at that part!

My MC bleeding has now stopped, did a ovulation test the day after it stopped (Sunday) which had a faint line, tested again Monday and Tuesday expecting to see a similar colour line... But no line at all?
Pregnancy test was negative on Friday.

After your MC did you treat your first day of bleeding as CD1?
I had some bleeding (more than spotting, but not heavy) on 20th,then just a bit of pinky discharge (tmi) until heavy bleeding started on 30th. Would you count 30th as CD1? Or 20th?
I'm so confused 😣😣😣
So confused

@BS9790 I’m counting from my first day of red blood but to be honest there seems to be no structure to the weeks/months following miscarriage so it anyone’s guess!

@Ejb86 yayyy more to the TWW club..... I personally would say the TWW is the most miserable part of TTC (even worse after miscarriage) so the more people losing their sh*t the better 😂 for support 👍🏼

@MrsB16 virtual hug
I would have been the exact same (or worse) so not silly at all .... I am having to talk my self down from so many thoughts of “I would have been x weeks due now” and “I would have been due on” etc etc I totally hold my hands up..... my losses and my desire to be still pregnant consumes 90% of my thoughts and it’s exhausting 😣

Ok just wondering - any of you suffer with extreme bloating a few weeks after miscarriage? It happened the last time too 😥 I literally look 4 months pregnant which is just Cruel 😭

This thread is moving quick!
Hey @MrsB16 and @Ejb86, I really can sympathize and I am basically just so sorry you both have to feel the same way I do sometimes. I wouldn't wish that feeling on anyone quite frankly!

I'm having the same wobbly day as you @MrsB16 it seems, the empty space that was something full of promise and plans and love. It's gone and it's absolutely devastating, and all bloody consume sometimes.

I however need to pull myself together. I have two children, I need to check myself here. But the body keeps forgetting I'm not pregnant anymore and then it goes through it all again when it remembers.

Up and down this week, helps no end to have this thread and you all, but it is almost unimaginable that so many people are going through the grief as well

My losses and my desire to be still pregnant consumes 90% of my thoughts and it’s exhausting

@Cruiser1 amen sister 😔

Thanks for checking in today @FireflyGirl
I’m okay today, still not quite my usual positive self! It was my first day back at work post Christmas and I seem to get very sore where they removed my tube when I’ve been on my feet all day. So I think that reminder plus being in my TWW was too much and needed a cry and a vent! I just worry I’ll never be pregnant again 😢 it seems so dramatic but it’s such a genuine worry at the same time!

@BS9790 i counted from the day my brown discharge actually filled a pad which was two days later then when it started. It wasnt yet bright red blood but it was filling a small pad. My ovulation happened CD15 counting from then but if i had counted from red blood it would have been CD13.

@GemLou88 dont think it’s implantation i am only 1dpo but it has stopped now so we lll see

Hi ladies! Cycle day 13 for me today, I am due to ovulate on cd15 but not got a positive OPK so perhaps it will be a bit later this month - hope not! We are DTD every other day at the moment and then when I get a positive OPK will do every night. Fingers crossed that works!

@michette that's awesome that you have ovulated!! Are you feeling the tww nerves?

@MilsCookie any ovulation signs yet or are you just gonna DTD oftern and see how it goes?

@ChampooPapi yep i find thati am thinking about it ALOT. I work about 2 minutes away from a big mothercare and every time I walk past and see the big sale signs I csmt help thinking that it should be me going there at lunch time shopping the sales for our little baby!! :(

@TerribleImagination I am too scared of getting a UTI if dont pee after DTD haha! I did lay down for about 30 minutes after today with hips slightly elevated for a bit though!

@Cruiser1 definitley! It's such a crazy time, if you arent trying to spot ovulation you are trying to spot whether you are pregnant haha!

Hope everyone had a good day :)

@MilsCookie just saw your last message sorry I missed it! Awh sorry to hear you got upset at the doctors:( I know what you mean I think I am fine untill someone says "that's really sad" or"i am so sorry that happened to you" and then its just a lump in my throat!!

@Anny27 this morning i was saying i an super relaxed about this unlike last time and then evening comes and i am starting to get agitated because i just want to know if it worked or not!
The tww is a torture- especially to the impatient women like me

My opk went from nothing to almost positive overnight so hopefully you ll get yours too. Are you sure about your dates ? Did you count from first day of AF?

@Cruiser1 didn’t bloat but putting on weight for no reason. Not sure what’s happening.
Or maybe it’s just xmas/comfort eating effect.

Have you tried IBS tablets or peppermint tea??

Ovulation day today according to FLO!
Hoping this is the month.
Feeling twinges in left side which I always get when ovulating so hopefully I have!
🙏🏼

@AlviesMam awesome!! Have fun if you are planning on DTD

Ah yay @AlviesMam good Luck!

@Michette I’m lactose intolerant so bloating from the bowel is normal for me but this is a bit more than normal .... I could be just hyper aware of every twinge atm but I do remember it happening after the first MC too

My BBT was 37.5 yesterday and 36.0 today 😦😥 I’m officially baffled
My hormones must be just all over the place

Have a good day ladies..... if anything happens today feel free to vent here.... we all know how you feel 💔😘

Though MC was almost done but then more heavy bleeding and big clots again yesterday. I was only 5 weeks, how much can there be?!

Hi ladies, welcome to newbies!

@MrsB61 not silly at all that you got upset about the pram. You are allowed your moments as you have a lot planned out for the little person and your family. ❤ I was so excited to finally tell people ... but I never got to do it.

To everyone in their fertile time, go BD crazy! @Anny27 @MilsCookie and anyone else I may have missed... partner and I only managed to do it every other day leading up to and on OV and no times after... 😑 we found the regime a bit exhausting and tbh out of the ordinary 🤣 hope it is enough 🤞

I am 4DPO and will be due AF around the 18th. I have lots of tests ready but not sure if it is a good idea to test as I know I will find BFNs majorly disappointing - as I know will all would. But it might be more gentle for me just to wait for AF if it is coming.

Good luck to all Baby Dancers and Two Week Waiters 💗🎉👶🏼🍀🌈

@Anny27 Haha I know I thought the same about UTI’s, but so far so good on that front 🤞🏻🤣

Hey @StephyRose I'm due my AF on the 16th and last DTD 31/12 - day before I was ovulating. Last night I had like clear jelly when wiping (sorry for TMI) would this be me ovulating again? I've ran out of sticks and would be my 2nd AF since my MC.

Not sure whether my body is playing tricks either... I'm feeling tired, back ache, lightheaded/dizzy and frequently urinating but drinking more which is unusual for me. I can't imagine I'd feel like this if it is only 8 days after conception. Anyone got any thoughts?? X

Could be implantation @mlax 🤞 I would wait until the weekend and maybe do a hpt! If you’re feeling up to it maybe DTD as well today just in case it is a late ovulation too! At least you’re covered either way then 😉

@DisneyMummySince2010 didn't realise there was such thing as implantation symptoms! I've just googled and the symptoms I'm experiencing are fatigue, urinating more frequently, back ache (which pre MC I always got on the day I'd start my AF but not due on until the 16th!) and then this dizziness/lightheaded. I don't want to get my hopes up though 😔

I will DTD tonight though! Thank you x