35+ TTC#1 Thread 5

[BambiOnIce80]

New Year, new thread! 🍾🥂

Basically: a wonderful bunch of ladies supporting each other through the TTC journey when trying for a first baby after 35.

Here's hoping 2019 brings some BFP luck to us all!! 🍀🤞🏻🍀🤞🏻

@Pinkywoo out of curiosity, do you get ewcm prior to your ovulation?

A little bit I think, I wonder if fertility lube would be enough to counteract the antihistamines?

found this interesting info - ovulation after nuvaring

@79andnotout my periods have been no more than spotting for just over a day. I haven’t tried the mooncup to know the exact amount. 25 ml is quite light though so that gives me a little hope. Thank you.
@QuantumGirl no I haven’t tried anything except reasearching google lol. But I’m up for raspberry tea and I will ring my gp tomorrow as I was late home today so didn’t get chance. Hopefully they can do some bloods. I know I suffered with anemia when I was very young (like early teens young) not much came of it.

Yes I think your right January isn’t a very enthusiastic kind of month anyway is it lol. Hopefully my mood will pick up. Although I am pretty sure DP leaving me to go skiing in 2 weeks has a lot to do with it.

@ladybranstonpickle go on then symptom spotting twin, have you seen anything else? Apologies for TMI but I've had a bit of a brownish colour when I wipe the past two days... 😬

Sorry that AF showed up and you're feeling down @Carley321 ❤️ Remind me if you're taking any conception vitamins except folic acid? If you had anaemia when you were younger (would I be right in thinking because you were iron/vit B12/folate deficient?) then it can't hurt to make sure you're taking iron and B12 supplements too. Most 'conception support' vits already have more than the RDA of the latter in them, so if you're already taking them then you should be covered 👍 Glad to hear your fur baby is doing a little better. What are you going to do to keep yourself distracted whilst DH is off on his (badly timed! 😔) skiing trip? My DP's boss was reworking the shift system for February and March today (going onto continental 4 days on/4 days off shifts in the short term) and I gave him orders that he'd best request his 4 days off to tie-in with my predicted FW! 🤪 Thankfully, the closer our ACU appointment is getting the more effort DP is putting in, so he has kindly accommodated my crazy! 😄

@Pinkywoo and @QuantumGirl I've been using the fertility lube for comfort more than anything else (😳), but I think it's exact purpose is to do the job of EWCM for those of us who doesn't get a lot. Not sure the sneezing is worth it if we're using fertility lube, but I thought I'd have a few months off in the name of scientific curiosity anyway 🤓

@Weathergirl1 that sounds like a very hopeful symptom! 🤩 I think I'd lose my 💩 completely if I got that at 6-10dpo!! Keeping everything crossed for you 🤞🏻🍀

Thing is @BambiOnIce80 I've now realised that there is a lot the drs don't tell us and we have to find out by ourselves. If antihistamines affect ewcm production, then what else is it affecting on the fertility system that we don't know about? I will hang in there for now and not take any antihistamines or steroid cream for now.

Today I signed up at a new gym and celebrated with a bag of milkybar buttons 🤩. Dry January became 'moist' January when I got home after work and celebrated with a G&T for having driven in heavy snow with no issues whatsoever even though I was bricking it. Tomorrow will be another day working from home - yay! 😀

Quick update: AF & cramps are here in full force. Dad still hanging on.
Got my date for laporoscopy through today: 21st Feb. Ill get pre-op date soon too. Smmy suster nanaged to wrung it out of me today thac wes been having issues ttc. She wanted to know why i hadnt gone to her negore... urrr cos she had 2 kids in under 3 years, both conceived 1st month of trying. Plus, because i knew she wouldn't let it rest. Every time my mum's out the room she's asking me more and more questions. Ive always been quite a private person, and it feels like an intrusion. My sister has always been an over-sharer, from the day she came hone at 15 to announce at the dinner table she'd had sex with her boyfriend 😱, Its detracting her from the elephant in the room that is my dad lying on his death bed in the middle of the living room I think.
Oh, nit so quick after all.
Hope everyone is well xxx

Ffs, apologies, typing faster than thinking.
"Smmy suster nanaged to wrung it out of me today thac wes been having issues ttc."
= "so, my sister managed to wring it out of me today that we've been having issues ttc"

@BalbiOnIce80 I’m just taking Folic acid although I have iron vitamins which I did begin taking then put them in my cupboard and forgot until you just mentioned it. So I’ll get them out ASAP lol. I’m yes I had low iron just ever so slightly so had to take some iron vits. I have thought about pregnacare etc and worried it may make my periods more irregular. Maybe I I could ask my doctor when I get an appointment.
He is away Tuesday to Saturday so I’ll be doing bugger all except working and worrying.
Well I don’t think that your request to DP is at all crazy (maybe I’m just on the same level 😂) I would have done exactly the same. I almost couldn’t even look at DP when I realised it maybe FW when he is away. I probably would have quite happily seen him cancel, although him skiing also plays on my anxiety so would have been a win all round lol. He is still going though and rightfully so he deals with my crazy enough throughout the year lol.
So has DP had confirmation of his shifts not interfering with fw yet? Hope you are ok too?

@CNizzle your sister sounds like fun 😊 lol. I don’t think I’d admit to having sex even now lol. How did you feel after telling her?

@QuantumGirl that sounds positive so you should celebrate with a gin and chocolate lol. Well done to the sign up! No snow here in Wales yet. I’m hoping it comes soon though!

Well no dry January for me either. I sat there with a bottle of wine to myself on Saturday feeling sorry for myself and getting rather tipsy!

This is very true @QuantumGirl. I don't take ibuprofen very often (more of a paracetamol kind of gal myself 💊), but I've read that's a huge TTC no-no because it messes with implantation... They don't write that on the back of the packet, do they?! Well done on the gym membership and for the scary drive home! 🌨 We had a mere fluttering of snow flakes for about 30 minutes yesterday, but it's sodding - 5°C this morning! Wish I could work from home more often rather than freeze my bits off at the train station every day 😣

@CNizzle, I quite enjoy trying to decipher your super-fast texting typos! 😂 I'm happy to report I got the guist without the translation! 👍😉 Bloody hell- what did your parents say when their 15 yo daughter announced she'd had sex at the dinner table?! 😨 My Nan was a midgies whatsit from kicking me out when I was 16 yo because she merely thought I was having sex with my boyfriend! Your sister sounds a bit like my BFF- I'd love to confide in her (she's my obvious go-to for absolutely everything else), but I know she wouldn't be able to let it lie and it'd be all she'd be asking me about forever more. I think you're right that it'll be a welcome distraction for her from the elephant in the room, but what's good for her is really hard on you... Maybe set down a ground rule that it's only OK to talk about if you bring it up?

@Carley321, working and worrying doesn't sound like the nicest way to be spending that 2 weeks! Can you schedule some catch ups with your mates to add in some distraction? DP's shifts for February are looking alright for FW, so just got to wait and see what March looks like 👍 And my dry January well and truly went out the window last week too 😏 Trying for a dry 2 weeks now to make up for it (and to help not mess up my temps during fertile week!🌡️).

What?! Why didn't I know that about ibuprofen? I think I had some a couple of days ago as I've been having headaches from cutting out caffeine. Can't do right for doing wrong! throws all ibuprofen in the bin

@CNizzle - your sister sound like me, and all my family. As we're all like that it's okay, must be difficult having a mix!

I am having a day where I look in the mirror and see my parents. I am getting fat, grey, and old. I can see my 'laughter lines' glaring back at me in my reflection on my laptop right now. I feel like I should be thinking about my retirement, not having children! I've just booked a hair appointment to solve one of those temporarily at least.

Not enough snow in the Peak District for my liking. The trains are still running and I can make it into work. Boo.

Right I'm ordering fertility lube, (I can't take ibuprofen due to bad asthma so that's ok) and much like your dp @BambiOnIce80, mine is getting more accommodating to the crazy the closer we get to the fertility tests. He's starting to worry about his sperm and was talking about buying some oysters the other day!

@79andnotout don't let these thoughts take over! Booking a hair appointment is a good start, after that have a look at what you can do with your laughter lines. I have invested on an anti wrinkle product that I am still to try on and considering Botox if budget allows. Failing that make up is my friend. I will start the gym on Monday because it usually takes 12 weeks for a visible weight loss and I am planning going on hols in the summer. These are the kind of things you have to do for yourself with or without a baby. Nothing can beat feeling good about yourself and I believe when you do, good things happen ❤️😘

@BambiOnIce80 is there any other medicine that should be avoided during ttc that you know of? From now on it's only folic acid, coq10 and DHEA for me.

Here's the link for the ibuprofen article @79andnotout (and it's ovulation it screws with rather than implantation - I've been reading far too many articles lately! 🙄)

www.pharmaceutical-journal.com/news-and-analysis/nsaid-use-may-prevent-fertile-women-from-ovulating/20068779.article?firstPass=false

It's antihistamines that might mess with implantation, which is why I'm giving them (and the part-time cat!) a wide bearth at the moment:

www.lanefertilityinstitute.com/blog/antihistamines

@Pinkywoo DP hates oysters but has read that spicey food can have the same affect, so there's been a lot of nduja dishes in our lives lately! 🌶 🔥 😂

I'm getting my roots sorted out on Saturday, thank god 😣 I reckon I've got to be approaching 50% grey beneath the brunette dye 🙄 I find it's hypervariable what I see when I look in the mirror - sometimes pleasantly surprised and sometimes horrified by the lines 😨 I guess it's only going to get worse... 😬

@QuantumGirl I've only really looked at the drugs I'm likely to take, but there's got to be plenty more out there to avoid 😕 On the supplements front, I've been thinking about soy isolflavones (the potential negative effects of the DHEA freaked me out too much to go there). Has anyone got any experience of the soy stuff?

Thanks @QuantumGirl - I think I'm just a misery bucket around this time in my cycle. I'll get over it! Hair apt booked anyway. @BambiOnIce80 - i grew my greys out for about six months hoping it was nice under all the dye and I have the shittest dishwater grey mousy brown mix these days. My hairdresser told me I need to wait at least another decade before contemplating a transition. I have great admiration for my aunts who've always got immaculate dark brown dyed hair in their sixties/seventies and it still looks great.

Had a nice and productive visit with my mom, thanks Bambi! When is your ACU appointment?

For what it's worth, I took ibuprofen and antihistamines while TTC. Not every day, but I didn't specifically stay away from them. I think I tried to cut down on caffeine and get a bit more sleep but can't remember how successful I was at that. I don't drink often in general, so that wasn't hard to cut down on for me.

I'm off to another scan this afternoon as baby wasn't fully cooperative at my 20 week scan. They need a better look at the heart so I'm hoping all is well!

@79andnotout I know what you mean. Two days ago I was feeling the same and crying my eyes out. Just needed a kick on the bum to get over it (and chocolate 😅).

@Kescilly thank you so much for sharing your ttc experience, it is gold to us! 😀. Best of luck with the scan this afternoon. Let us know how it goes.

@BambiOnIce80 Eek, I am starting to panic a bit about what I've done! Been a bit distracted this week with a 3 hour commute each way so trying not to think about it until the weekend... I've ordered some cheapie test sticks though despite varied reviews (never had an issue with the OPKs).

@QuantumGirl aw glad to find someone else 35+ who has a thing for Milky Bars - at the moment I'm quite excited about the mini eggs being back in the shops for Easter! 😍

@Weathergirl1 milky bar rocks! I don't care what anyone else say 😆.

A 3 hour commute is a working day in itself! I thought I had it tough with 1.5 hour commute to London each way! Is it a temporary thing for you?

@QuantumGirl yes just this week thankfully - got moved from where we should have been the the furthest place within the same region 🙄. I did stay with friends on Monday evening but preferred to get home really especially with various symptoms going on!

Oh I've totally embraced them. I had a restricted diet last year and found milky bar to be one of the very few chocolates that didn't contain soy (they use sunflower lecithin instead) so one of the few things I could have as a treat and I've become a bit addicted... 😂

Don't blame you @Weathergirl1. White chocolate isn't real chocolate as it doesn't contain cocoa, it's only milk and vanilla I think. Still delicious though 😋

@79andnotout I've had near enough the same conversation with my hairdresser about transitioning and got much the same answer 😂

Oooh, exciting for the scan this afternoon @Kescilly 🤩 Glad you had a lovely time with your mum too 🙂 Our ACU appointment is next Tuesday morning, but I'm oddly not thinking about it that much! 😕 I think it's likely to be a bit anticlimactical, to be honest. I've already worked out the worst and best case scenarios for the appointment. Worst case: A) they don't acknowledge the previous combined 7 years of TTC we have between us with our ex's and we therefore have to wait another year to get any treatment and B) they also don't take my previous HSG and intrauterine US results from down south and I have to faff about getting them done again over the next year 😏 Best case: A) they do count our past years TTC and we'd be eligible for IVF sooner rather than later and B) they also take my HSG and intrauterine US results from down south and I don't have to faff around getting them done again 🙄 Time will tell...

Urgh to 3 hour commute @Weathergirl1 😨 I've been there and done that for 5 years when I was down south- never again!!

Just catching up with you all...

Can I join you all on the discussions about greying hair 👩🏼‍🦳. I first got a grey hair when I was 16 (so unfair) and since then I have coloured it, trying my best to keep it the same shade as my natural colour 👩🏻. My hair grows super fast...so I'm at the hairdressers every 4 weeks to keep on top of it. So bloody annoying and expensive 💰💰. I've recently had a growth spurt of new hair at the front. As it's new hair it has a curl (the rest of my hair is straight). Can't do anything with the curl. My DH never wants me to transition to a full head of grey...

The worst thing about working is the commute! So pointless. I used to do a 90 minute commute each way, after a while I thought sod-it and now work for myself. My commute is now a flight of stairs. 👍🏻👍🏻

I met some new people today. They asked that question "do you have children". When I said no (just me, the DH and the cat 🐱), they then asked "why!". It's the first time anybody has asked me the kids question since the MC. I think i handled it well, and by that I mean i didn't burst in to tears and totally embarrassed myself. Had a cry when I got in my car.

Cd11 here. I'm using the clear blue advanced opk this cycle. I got my first flashing smiley face today. FF is predicting O on cd17, but this is only based upon my last cycle data...so anytime between now and then...let the games begin! Funny how the first third of the cycle is a little boring.

Hope you are all well 🤗🤗