35+ TTC#1 Thread 3

[Blondcat]

We seem to have filled up our last thread so here is a new one.

A wonderful bunch of ladies supporting each other through the ttc journey when trying for a first baby after 35.

Goodluck to all ladies we can do it

Urgh. Cross-posted @Beeseeinya! Sorry for the BFN 😔

I'm most impressed with your disengagement from symptom spotting @QuantumGirl 🙌 Sounds like we're on a similar time line this cycle - CD23 here with AF due Saturday...

@BambiOnIce80 Oh don’t! That thought had already crossed my crazy little mind 🤣

Eek that is not good, your poor hubby! What does he do?

Wishing you all the luck on Saturday and with your hubby finding a new job 💐

@QuantumGirl you’re doing fabulously. I’ve been ‘windy’ this month too 😁 🤞🏻 for you for Friday.

Oh no @BambiOnIce80 - that's awful news! How is he taking it? Is he in an industry where there's plenty of work available, or would you potentially have to relocate? I hope he's at least being offered a good leaving package!

Interesting read ladies: www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2013/07/how-long-can-you-wait-to-have-a-baby/309374/

Thanks @MrsRRC and @79andnotout 💖 DP does 'IT stuff', so at least there's lots of possibilities locally. I'm the one that's trickier to find a vacancy for (and I'm the main wage earner) so he has to find jobs around where I'm based 😉 DP was remarkably c'est la vie about the whole thing- I was the one balling my eyes out on Friday night! He'd only been with the company for 3 months and was at the end of his probationary period. He hadn't had any bad feedback at all, only positive, so it came as a hell of a shock. He's moderately optimistic that the job he left for this one will take him back (they're hiring at the moment and he wouldn't need any training, plus he's stayed on good terms with his old boss). It's quite a lot less money (thus why he took a punt on the job he just lost), but it's more than enough to pay the bills and live life 👍 He'll hopefully get a yes or a no back from his old job by the end of this week 🍀🍀🍀🍀

Interesting article @MrsRRC. I was 30 when I was TTC the first time round, so I don't think my age is necessarily my problem (still keen to see what my blood results have to say about that though!).

Welcome @MrsBirds 👋 I'm not a temp-er, so I'm afraid I can't help with that query. What I would say though is if you're only 10dpo at most, then even a FRER would struggle to give you a reliable result that early. You want to be as close as possible to 14dpo to get a reliable result (I don't bother before 12dpo, personally). Wishing you luck 🤞🏻

@BambiOnIce80 - ha same roles here, I'm the science one and breadwinner, and OH is an IT geek. If we ever do have a child they don't stand much chance of being a cool kid.

@MrsRRC - thanks for the article. That's somewhat reassuring.

@MrsBirds - I temp, and a temp drop signifies AF is on the way for me, usually within 12 hours of the drop. It might just be an erratic measurement though.

Hi all. Really sorry about the DP job loss @Bambionice - I hope something comes up soon. Similar just happened to my younger brother and he had only been there for 5 months. Hopefully something will come up for them both.

Good news indeed for Megan, but of course a small part of me couldn't believe it just took her 2 or 3 months. Lucky thing. But then it took me just one go the first time before the mmc so that's just the luck of the draw I suppose.

Well done everyone for not symptom spotting. I am going to try and join you this month. I'm off to Hong Kong on Friday and then my Mum is coming to visit later next week so I have enough to keep me busy!

I'm not sure what is going on with me - I had a positive OPK on Wednesday and Thursday last week but according to CM it only really disappeared today and my temperature hasn't really risen (only 0.1 degrees). So either it's on a slow climb or I tried to ovulate and then didn't. Which is a shame with the acupunture as I am sure it was my month! Which is still could be so trying to be positive.

Good news @79andnotout about the progesterone and ovulating - it must make you feel so much better!

I do currently have 6 large spots on my face which is different, very painful and very embarrassing for work today.....especially as I was on a review elsewhere.

I'm sorry about your husband's job, @BambiOnIce80. It sounds like he has options though and I hope there's something great waiting for him!

Sorry to hear that @BambiOnIce80. I'm also in IT and DP is science. Nerds unite! I would do anything to get out of my awful IT job. Even have a baby ;)

Reckon Harry & Meg went for IVF? She's 37, plenty of money and if they want more than one perhaps they might as well do it that way. Then again maybe they were lucky!

Still no AF. At what point would a test actually be reliable I.e. not wasting my time and money. I'd rather test when it will be a really clear result. I'm on cd30, I THINK 10dpo and my cycles are usually 29.

Oh make that 11dpo? Errgh numbers.

@Beeseeinya what test did you do? I think at 14dpo you should be pretty certain. I'd be all over the daily tests though. I can't help myself. The optimism has not yet dulled...

I got my BFP at 12dpo although I suspect I would’ve seen it the day before had I tested. Possibly even at 10dpo. It showed up straight away and was not a squinter. I have a short LP though, so I don’t know if that makes a difference. I used a FRER which is also more sensitive.

Anyone here have a long luteal phase? I seem to be ovulating at around day 12/13 and my cycle is 30 days. It makes the 2ww so long 😑

Hey all, I'm back from my wee jaunt to London. Full of wine, booze & food! Need a detox now!
Back at work today, and just catching up with the thread.
@Beeseeinya its not over til AF shows so fingers crossed!
@BambiOnIce80 rubbish news about the job. Heres hoping he gets something sorted asap, must be stressful for you both
@MrsBirds a single drop in temp might not indicate AF arriving, but if its low tomorrow too I'd expect AF to be imminent.

@79andnotout good news bloods about ovulating.

OH had to give his semen analysis today (FINALLY!) We've to expect the results by post, he was vague on timescales for this, but I didnt expect him to ask ALL the right questions!
I also managed to call the secretary at ACS and rearrange my HyCoSy scan for pre-ovulation so i dont have to lose a whole month ttc.
After a bad week at work, OH told me he'd happily be a Stay-at-home-dad. Hes obviously becoming a bit more comfortable about ttc. Thing is, he might have to. I'm the main wage at the moment, he's self-employed but is looking to take on staff in the near future, freeing him up for potential childcare. Only issue so far being the lack of child!
Hope everyone's doing well just now x

Interesting how many of us are in science geek/IT nerd couples and that we're the bread winners 🤓 I'm not going to lie - the upside to DP being at home is coming home to the bath already run for me and dinner on the go... Glass half-full and all that 🍷

@CNizzle, glad you had a fab time down south and you got your scan changed to a better time 🙂 My DP has always suggested that he'd happily be a stay at home dad seems I'm the main wage earner, which is always greeted with an "aye, right! 🤨" from me! 2 wages would still be better than my one, so crack on with the job hunting sunshine! DP is also taking advantage of his unexpected lack of work to go get his repeat SA done tomorrow (he hadn't read the opening days and it was shut when he bowled-up last week 🙄). Lovely GP lady has also asked to see him next week - she really is a very lovely and proactive GP lady 😍

@edidxb, I think acupuncture messed with my cycle a bit last month 🤔 AF turned up, I bled for 2 days and then it stopped completely. I freaked out (I always used to bleed, albeit getting lighter and lighter, for 6-7 days), so I saw the 2 day bleed as a sure fire sign that I was definitely in perimenopause 😒 Then, low and behold, it kicked back in like nothing had happened on the 4th day- go figure 😕 The only thing I'd done differently to other cycles was have acupuncture. Mentioned it to acupuncturist and he literally said "meh" 🤨 One was not amused! He said it was "insignificant", even though that'd never happened to me before in 28 years of AF cycles🤨 I'm thinking the first thing I'm going to bin if DP takes a while to find a new job is the acupuncture. With this guy, anyway. The practice nurse recommended an acupuncturist who's also a nurse and specialises in fertility. I googled her and she's got great feedback (and is cheaper than the guy I'm seeing- bonus!). Think I'd give her a whirl if I did try it again.

How's @Carley32 doing? Is everything alright lovely?x

@BambiOnIce80 I was going to mention exactly that. My DH is a contractor and we have had a few occasions when his contract finished earlier than expected and although it brings money worries it also means dinner is always ready and housework is done. However He did started calling me at work 5 times a day to let me know he was bored tho 🙄. It also reminds me of chandler from friends who took Monica's OPK tests to pass the time when he was made redundant 😂 - make sure yours are safe 😁

@BambiOnIce80 Hello 👋. Sorry to hear about DP, that’s horrible news. 🤞 that he will get his old job back, it does sound promising!
Hope your not to stressed over it though.

I am ok feeling a bit fed up this week. It’s the not knowing if anything is wrong and the fact that I’m to irregular to plan lol. I am thinking of just having a mini break from ttc and making some plans to try and take my mind off it. I feel like i can get so obsessive with it all 🙈.
☝️ Yes I am one huge negative worrier!!

@79andnotout That’s good news. Maybe the fact that you have a little piece of mind will contribute to you having some luck 🤞🤞.

@Beesinya you’re still in with a chance until you see AF 🤞.

@CNizzle glad you had a fab time away

Sorry for not mentioning everyone, I couldn’t keep up with the thread. Lol.
Good luck to all testing and to anyone ovulating soon 👍😂 xx

That's hilarious @QuantumGirl 😂🤣 I do have an excess of OPK's and no intention of using them for the foreseeable, so DP is welcome to indulge in the POAS if it helps alleviate the boredom 😂

Sorry you're feeling down @Carley32, but I totally understand how the not knowing can get to you 😔 Having positivity during TTC is a very wonderful thing but, let's face it, we're only human and that's just not possible 100% of the time. If you need some time, you take it and put yourself first.x

Thank you ladies! Everything crossed here and let you know the outcome!

@Bambi. It is hard, I just such an overthinker too. Which doesn’t help lol. Well we have plans for the next 3 weeks. So I am just going to enjoy them and try not to think to much into anything else. ALthough I can’t resist using the opks because I just want to know if I actually ovulate and when I’m my cycle.
So I guess by break I just mean not thinking about it quite so much and just see where the month takes me this time around lol.

Hope everyone is good. Any tests coming up?

@Carley32 I'm testing Friday if my temp doesn't drop before then, current 9dpo and AF due Friday. Not holding out much hope but I did buy some frers just in case. Also not really that fussed as I've just joined a 12 week body transformation program as I've realised I've put on 10cm on my waist since this time last year, and that needs to go! I think it's all booze - if I eat too much food it goes on my hips but alcohol is another matter. I'm really short so it only takes a stone either way and I go from chunky to thin or vice verse.

Anyway, it's a nice distraction while TTC. Will be good to be fit again.

I asked OH last week if I was looking thick around the middle and he said no with a look of fear in his eyes! A sure fire indication he agreed with me but was scared of the consequences. It's really annoying, he has the body of a teenager and eats like a horse.

Hi guys, am new here. 37 (38 next month). DH is 44. I've started noting the BBT for about a month... however the thermometer I'm using is one decimal place.... and I'm not getting a proper ovulation graph. Any recommendations on thermometers?

I use this one @terriwrist www.amazon.co.uk/Basal-Body-Thermometer-BBT-113Ai-iProv%C3%A8n/dp/B01MFGHHK2?ref_=bl_dp_s_web_6880326031&tag=mumsnetforum-21

and it has served me well, but is out of stock. Yeah you wont get any sensible readings with one decimal place.

Thanks @79andnotout .

Well think I'm out, cramps and blood. This is a really short cycle, with AF coming three days before expected! Well at least I didn't waste any FRERs :)