TTC - First time!

[mrsjkerry]

Hello there

Is there anyone else on here trying for their first baby around the same age as me? 25/26? Would love to talk to someone about it as I am currently driving my husband mad with all the TTC chat!

I guess you can't argue with that!

My digital was expired and decided to say not pregnant within about 40 seconds so ignoring that. Guessing a battery thing??

My first response line is darker than it was a lot further on last time I'm hoping that's a good sign.

Still can't process it.

Thanks ladies for all being so lovely. I will make my exit but will float around for some HUGELY deserved BFPs!

Claire congratulations! Here's hoping it sticks this time! Hopefully in a few weeks I can join your BFP club..

Massive congrats Claire! More baby dust ✨✨✨
Managed to dtd very tiredly last night lol still negative opk last night so testing again tonight!

Wow claire HUGE congratulations! Such great news! Wishing you a very healthy pregnancy xxx

Hope everyone had a good Valentine's last night. Because I haven't been drinking I could only manage one and a half glasses of prosecco before it went straight to my head! DH swiftly ordered me a coffee instead .

Welcome to the thread Marie and Tuxie feel free to share anything and everything - there's no such thing as TMI here .

Thanks for the welcome and congratulations 88Claire!

I'm pretty new to the whole TTC thing, and I thought my OH would be really up for DTD more often... Come valentine's night though and I got an "I'm tired"

Never used to bother me before but now I'm so impatient. Especially as it's my FW ATM.

Am I being unreasonable?!

Thank you ttcnovice and congrats claire! I've got my FX for a BFP but I know it's not too likely being first cycle

I don't think you were being unreasonable marie - when DH & I discussed it his knowledge stretched as far as having to DTD perhaps 6 times over a month - face palm! Needless to say he is more up to speed now bless.

Over FW we managed to DTD 5 times and it was quite hard to go from the 'in the mood' DTD to the 'I'm fertile please can we DTD?!' maybe try some bribery 😉

Marie it is hard. The trick is that men want to feel they're wanted and not just for their sperm. You have to genuinely make him feel you're having sex because you fancy him and love him and not just because you're fertile. Sometimes that requires more effort than usual I've found. Dressing up, nice underwear, kissing him and coming on to him etc. My husband always says he hates it when I just lie there and expect him to get on with it.

I'm kind of the same Marie!
Hubs and I have always been active, but not overly, can go from a couple of times a week, or every day for 3 days to 2 weeks in between! I don't have a massive sex drive and he's always been the instigator but I never turn it down lol. So to suddenly go from that to me making the first move on the right days is hard as he works long hours on his feet and I've got a mentally draining job and love sleep lol so our libidos don't always match. Last couple of months ttc it seems he's more up for it either in my 2ww or straight after af, it's quite frustrating that during my fw (now) we both seem to be struggling, him with tiredness and me trying to get in the mood for anything other than the biology of it! We did it last night and I'm sure he either had a dry one or even faked it lol it was about 2am and I couldn't have felt less like it, zonked out sleeping straight after and haven't leaked anything today which usually happens all day after he's filled me up the night before 😂🙈 but we are in a different position to most couples in that I haven't gone into full ttc detail with him. He knows I'm off the pill but ignorance is bliss to him, he stresses easily and I don't want to demand off him or he will freak out lol he's just expecting me to turn round one day with a bfp... which is gonna be hard if we can't get into some kind of routine!
Maybe I'm overthinking. I've been ttc since Nov so I'm getting a bit panicky now which doesn't help, so gonna just try and get a couple more sessions in before Sunday but if nothing this month, I'm coming off all apps and opks and just doing it for fun when we both feel!x

tuxie11 I may have to try to educate my OH a bit more.. I'm not even sure he knows what a FW even is!! The problem is that it's only C1 and I don't want to pile on the pressure too soon. Apart from saying we'd like to try, and throwing out the condoms (I haven't been on the pill or implant for years) we haven't talked too much about the ins and outs of it (excuse the pun)! How did you broach the subject with your DH?

And thanks mrsjkerry .. don't laugh but I actually dressed to impressed last night for Vday! (Full sexy underwear.. the works)! 🙈
I'm now in the mindset of 'well if that doesn't work then nothing will' 😂

And mistyBxx it does sound like we're in a similar situation... It must be hard trying to coordinate your libidos!! (I'm impressed at the 2am DTD btw... I'd be snoring by that point lol! Your idea of throwing out all the kits and taking the stress out of TTC sounds like it may work for you both. I'm only on C1 and I'm already obsessing!!

X

Well he goes to bed later than me as he gets home late at night and takes a while to get ready for bed so doesn't come up til about 1, by which time I've usually only been in bed an hour or so (I'm a night owl too) so I'm not usually in the deepest of sleeps when he comes crashing into bed so I just have to keep my eyes open and do a bit of shuffling but it's never my most sexiest of moves and by this point he's ready for sleep so it usually happens or I can't keep my eyes open for more than 30 seconds haha. Maybe I shouldn't be so traditional and just pounce on him on the couch in the one hour we get to spend together a night between him getting home and me going to bed. We are like passing ships most days 😳
Yeah if thus isn't a bfp I'm going to ignore my next cycle as I don't want a Christmas baby anyway lol Nov is my cutoff til January! But not going to NOT dtd at all so if it happens it happens lol I should and will be grateful for any baby at this point, regardless 😂x

Marie He's always been a little broody & I kinda felt after we got married a few months ago why not - no one is ever ready and after I came off the pill I was really worried it would take 6 months or so get them back and luckily it was only a month, so we thought let's go for it!
For my own interest I started googling it, downloaded Ovia & Glow to track my cycle and just kind of shared the information I found out... I showed him the apps and stuff so he could see and felt a part of it and I think he felt better for knowing about it a bit more about the whole process too
I think he more so liked the challenge of FW albeit we were both bloody exhausted after haha!

Marie and Tuxie are either of you using OPKs to track your cycle, or just the apps? I shouldn't really encourage obsession (like some of us on this thread already have ) but I found that my FW varied hugely in real life from what the apps predicted once I started using OPKs. So they've been a massive help as otherwise I would have missed my FW altogether. I know Misty had similar problems with two different apps predicting two different FWs too, so just something to be aware of for you both xx

Thank you TTC

I've only had one cycle off the pill which was 28, and had ovulation pains about halfway through. When I started tracking it estimated for halfway (as it would) and I had some noticeable cramping on the 9th so hoping it's accurate. My DH works away a lot and was for once home all week so we DTD as much as possible up to the 11th (TMI!) so hoping that's enough.

I think if we aren't good this cycle we'll try every few days & after that perhaps look at OPK's. I feel I might become obsessive!!

Tuxie11 good idea to show him the app..I may steal that idea! Love that you've turned it into a challenge too! 😂

Thanks for the heads up ttcnovice ! I've tracked my AF for the last few years using the app Clue which hopefully has a pretty accurate FW prediction by now, and I also downloaded ovia recently so hopefully that will give me an idea.

I think I'll try OPKs if after a few months we haven't got a BFP. I don't want to freak the OH out too soon though as I can imagine it would take over my life 🙈

X

Fx marie we've got this!

Marie and Tuxie - It definitely is easy to become obsessed so you've both got the right idea holding off for now! You never know you could get lucky in your first cycle too, Fx for you both

Arguments in my house tonight 🙄 about the same old stuff to be fair. But it makes my stomach contract into a fist of anxiety and I hate it. It also can't be good for TTC. And makes DTD pretty hard...!

I feel you mrsjkerry 🙌🏼 shit when you have nights like that, hubs and I are rather fiery and we don't go a week without a blowout lol but we've been together on and off for 12 years (married 5 months lol) so the love is there, but the fights can be horrific. We've been ok so far this week, I try not to let anything get to me during fw if I can help it (but like I'm always right so it's hard lol)
Try not to let it get to you and don't dwell, and never go to sleep on a fight. Easier said than done I know.
Well I made hubs a stunning tea tonight (and he's a professional chef so impressing him is hard!) he loved it and we are having a chilled night. Hoping to dtd again tonight but we will see, I will be off to bed in an hour and he won't come up for another hour after that so it's the flip of a coin if I will be conscious enough hahahaha 😂

Tuxie I use Clue app which I find really accurate and Ovia which is more detailed but seems less accurate.
I've been given 2 overlapping fw, Clue started Sunday and ends Friday, Ovia starts tomoz and ends Tuesday! Only dtd twice since Sunday so need to shape up!
I do opk as well and have been testing daily since cd7, I'm now on cd14 and tests are still negative.
So easy to get obsessed!!x

We will have been together four years this summer. And to be fair it's my own insecurity that causes the arguments. What if scenarios designed to test how much he loves me etc. I always want reassurance that he's happy with me and wants to be with me and he gets fed up repeating the same stuff I guess.

Anyway, never lasts long. We are now in bed eating chocolate having DTD second time today 👍🏻👌🏻

You are the dtd queen 😂😂😂
Bless you, men just don't 'get' that we need reassurance like loads of the time!
Have a good night.... 😉
And wake up feeling better in the morning chick.
I'm off to bed now leaving hubs playing the Xbox.
Will update tomoz if I manage to pounce on him when he comes up in a bit lol.

How mad is this site though? Literally wishing eachother good luck for having sex 🙈😂 we girls are a bit crazy I'm sure!!

Night all x

misty I found that too with the apps as I had clue as well (so easy to obsess straight away right?!) clue was the same as glow - I think they started a day earlier so we managed to cover all bases from the Sunday to the Saturday 😂 I think it caught my O day as the 9th which seemed pretty accurate but 🤞🏻 We shall see!

I can't say I like Ovia but I saw many people talking so I've kinda stuck it out - tho I've heard it chops and changes too. I'd be tempted to start OPKs but one step at a time I think

mrsj I second you are the DTD queen! DH & I did once high five because we were so exhausted but chuffed we made it. The things you do TTC!

Oooops! I definitely didn't keep up with all this last night (may have been DTD so sorry not sorry)!

Mrsjkerry I hope everything is ok with you and your oh this morning! It's so true that even after years together, we women still need reassurance that the love is there. I'm exactly the same. Me and my oh had a bit of a tiff (me just not talking to him after then whole valentine's evening flop) and I found it really hard to bite my tongue so that we we're not arguing yesterday, so we could DTD. I'll be back to telling him off as soon as I'm out of my FW and onto the tww!!

Tuxie11 MistyBxx
I think that clue will probably be more accurate for me than ovia as I've been using it for so long... I got ovia too though just to make sure!
On clue it says my FW was sun-Fri and on ovia it's Tues-sun so they are a bit out but I think as long as we're DTD a lot between last Sunday and this one coming then hopefully I'll catch my O day somewhere in the middle!

FX for us all and have a great day ladies! 😘

Well I'm feeling really down this morning girls! I'm pulling all my best (sleepiest) moves and he's just not feeling it 😩 he's having a mega bad time in work at the mo, in the middle of changing jobs and he's really stressed, so I don't wanna be like "sex now please!" But he gets into bed and either immediately falls asleep or like last night was like "babe honest I'm just too tired" and I feel like crying!! I try and cheer him up and we have never had any issues in this department, and haven't now, it's just timing but I'm annoyed coz I can't force him obviously lol but I feel really rejected and frustrated because I'm right in the middle of fw. Today is meant to be ov day according to Clue but I still had a negative opk last night. It's the 1st day of fw according to Ovia. But we have only dtd twice since Clue fw started and only one of those times he released the swimmers, the second time, he said he did but I didn't feel anything and nothing came out the next day. I feel like this month is a lost cause already. And the worst thing is, next week he will probably be horny as hell lol he's always pouncing on me either in my 2ww or just after af.
Does anyone know if there's a hormonal reason for this? I admit I'm looking for excuses here lol but is there some biological reason why he seems to be most up for it before and after my af?
wouldn't it make sense for men to pick up on our hormones around ov time?
I'm really pissed off today lol x