TTC through Donor IUI or Donor IVF or just undecided - all welcome! #makeithappen #loadsofBFPs!!!!

[kwick]

This thread is for anyone trying to conceive... or thinking about doing so through donor IUI or donor IVF. Nothing TMI - feel free to join, we are a lovely group here to support and help keep the cray-cray away!
Here is the link to the previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2688511-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen

Here is the link to the thread before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2587046-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome

Lol worth every penny for piece of mind. Glad nice strong line :) so glad it's test day tomorrow kwick please let us know how u get on.
Good luck with the scan pez I totally get what u mean about the excited nervous thing, I'm like that about next Friday!!

Pez - I find a long exhale useful for relaxing both mentally and physically. It's also great for dealing with any discomfort.

Hopefully you're getting your nervousness over and done with now so that you'll feel fine on the day. Having said that, it doesn't really matter! On my most recent IUI I had a stressful morning and it clearly didn't make any difference!

Make sure you lie for as long as possible after the IUI. I quite enjoyed my half hour lying listening to music after my IUIs!

Good luck today kwick hope those numbers have bounced up!!!!!!

Hope scan goes well pez

Oh shoes I barely rest after IUI... always desperado for the loo!!!

I asked lovely lady who took bloods if it would mean that I am not preggers if HCG had not doubled and she said not necessarily.
Will get results this pm.

Good luck pez!!!

Ah yes, I'd forgotten about that Kwick. Your clinic make you have a full bladder and my clinic tell you to empty your bladder prior to IUI. I can see that would make quite a difference to how much lying around relaxing you can do afterwards!

Isn't it reassuring that all the specialists are agreed on the best methods

Crossing my fingers for you for a good blood result this afternoon

Pickle - the tests are finally going in the post to you today so should turn up on Monday I would have thought.

Everything crossed for you kwick for strong blood results this pm

My appointment is at 12:40, fingers crossed for decent looking follies and lining.
I've booked next Friday off as it will be day 13 and I normally get my LH on day 12. I thought that if it got delayed this month then I will at least be at home to test on Friday... or I can cancel my annual leave at the last minute if needs be.

I've decided my stress is pure excitement and I'm trying hard to embrace it!! Deep breath in...

By the way my clinic told me to empty my bladder about an hour before and then to drink a bit while waiting so I guess they're taking the half full bladder approach!

Pez my advice would be to try and relax and keep things as normal as possible. I missed my first attempt at IUI because the clinic was shut for easter, then when I went the following month for my day12 scan it was the Friday before a bank holiday and my one follie was too small. I had to not ovulate over the long weekend and hope for the best but was certain that all would go wrong. Got there on the Tuesday to a lovely juicy folly, had the HCG jab and went back the next morning for the procedure. I think the wife and I were just so stunned it was actually happening that we didn't have time to be stressed about it. I rested for 10 minutes afterwards, then drove an hour home, had lunch and went to work. Looking back on it, I probably shouldn't have gone to work and should have marked the occasion somehow instead, but having had 3 mornings in a row off I felt bad! Got my fingers crossed for you.

Kwick I've never found myself caring so much about someone else's blood test! Sending many positive thoughts!

kwick I'm 38 (last October) and currently feeling very despondent about it all. I know - I'm sure this is just a reaction to the appt yesterday. I've had relatively few attempts, but I am feeling rather alone with this all and the doctor is suggesting that if it hasn't worked with the first three goes the chances of IUI working are fairly slim. It's about the only time I've wished I had a partner to make the decision with.

I would love to know how many cycles of IUI and/or IVF people have had, and if they had one and then the other, how many IUIs they had first. I'd also love to hear people's personal experiences of IVF (in a PM if you'd prefer). I thought I was being very realistic about this all, but am having a stronger emotional response than expected. Partly I am so frustrated and feel so cheated because I'm not just finding a partner and having sex like a 'normal' person. I know that doesn't work for lots of people, but when I read about people being upset because they are struggling to conceive a third child I want to scream.

Oh goodness, I got carried away there and I can't edit. Sorry...

sorry to hear you're struggling with this difficult decision late. I'm too new to this (1st IUI next week if all goes well) to have any wise advice on IVF. I'm sure others on the thread will though

My scan went well, plenty of follicles growing (I heard quite a few 9s and 8s but lost track after a while). Lining on the thin side as expected but doc said there was nothing to worry about at this stage. I'm going back Monday and need to start testing tomorrow.

kwick let us know as soon as you hear back x

Late - no need to edit; there's nothing wrong with your post!

I think we're bound to feel frustrated with how 'easy' this could have been had we met lovely men to be doing this with, especially when you're at a point in the process where its not obvious what to do next.

You're definitely not allowed to feel despondent yet though In the grand scheme of things you're fairly early on in the process really.

I've had 4 IUIs. I actually got BFPs on all four of them but lost attempt 1 and attempt 3 within a couple of days of getting the BFP, so these were chemical pregnancies. Attempt 2 was the BFP that progressed to 11 weeks before the MMC was discovered. The chemical pregnancies were annoying but gave me faith in the clinic, the process and that I was getting the timing right. Because of this I would have continued to IUI No. 5 if No. 4 hadn't worked.

There are other ladies on this thread much better placed to help you weigh up IVF vs. IUI.

I think in your position, if I could afford it, I would probably try an IVF next but I know it would be a difficult decision because of committing to all the hormone treatments.

You have had a hycosy, haven't you?

kwick I'm so excited for you and have everything crossed!

Pez don't forget to be extra kind to yourself before and after!

Late I'm really sorry to hear that you're in this position. When my partner and I used the same clinic we were frustrated on the guidance that they gave regarding timing - for our first IUI we followed their guidance and had a BFN, for the planned second we decided not to go ahead because we weren't happy with the timing advice we were given and someone not getting back to us, and then for the actual second attempt we went with what we thought and told a white lie about the timing and we're currently 8 weeks pregnant. It's early days but we had the first scan this week and got to see the heartbeat. I find our clinic a real mix of fantastic team members and a few who just don't seem to want to be there

Sorry Pez, I don't have any advice for you, but I just wanted to say you'll be fine!! I don't think it's as scary as it seems - at least, I hope not

Kwick how'd you get on? I'm dying with anticipation!

LOL shoes!!! Lucky you with an empty bladder!!! I was told that they need to bladder full so that the womble lies flat and they can get the catheter in
Very scary that methods are so different - but hey both ways seem produce results

pez for a scan or for the IUI? For scans I always had to have an empty bladder!

late it is only natural to feel down - when I got to 4 failed IUIs I got a lot of pressure from a family member to move to IVF, which I did after failed IUI #5. Then I got the BFP with the IVF... then I had a MC. Then I did IVF again, another IUI and now this IUI.
My first 5 IUIs were with same donor - if I could do it again I would have changed that variable sooner (like after 3 IUIs). I also would have started on the DHEA and Co-enzyme q10 and Inofolic right at the start (if not before) but seeing as I cannot change the past, my philosophy is that I have learnt something valuable every step of this journey and it is what it is. Remember: you are in perfect time
If consultant recommending IVF then I would probably take their advice.
Oh and what shoes said. Have you had a hycosy? Another thing I should have done right at the start and not after try 7!!!!
Any questions on IVF let me know - I have done both stimulated and natural.

pez this is amazeballs news!!! Well done!!! Are you on any meds?

chasing what clinic are you with?

So ladies - good news!!!
BHCG was at 187, now at 887 - I am not very good at maths but even I can tell you that is more than double!!!!
Progesterone was at 156, now at 164 - I am taking Crinone gel twice a day but this is the HIGHEST it has even been - even when I was on Crinone, Cyclogest and Prontogest all at the same time. I am feeling encourage and relieved!!!

I told my main boss - who was nice about it but basically put it in my hands to find ad-hoc solutions to the trips I need to make will see what I can do.
Will talk to other boss (I have 3) on Monday - but will try not to give reason... just explain I have to curtail my travel on medical grounds.

I have a lot going on this weekend - including having a new floor put in in the communal stairwell (my treat - cannot handle state it is in anymore) and cooking lunch for my family in sunday... but I will be taking it easy!!!

So then Kwick - if you can stop being so cryptic for a moment, are we to understand that your HCG results look promising today?

I've been checking back every couple of hours to see how you've got on!

Pez - I missed your post earlier. Great news about the follies

Ooh cross post. Fantastic news!!!

Eek kwick so unbelievably excited for you, been waiting to see ur results all day

shoes thank you lovely lady :)

pez well done on follies growth-getting very exciting

late don't apologise sweet,that's one the best things about this site we can all be brutally honest about our feelings and not worry about real life etiquette. Keep ur chin up sweet

Huge congratulations chasing what a lovely sound that must have been

Oh I am sorry I had many of you in suspenders - I got the news - via text - whilst in a meeting and then had to wait to call clinic for exact numbers - then I had to leg it home.

BTW Can you fricking believe that my sainsburys shop was delivered by TWO men who ummed and arhed about taking it up one flight of stairs!!!! I thought that was part of the service??????

Anyway I am feeling embraced by the goodwill and support I have found on MN and feeling all warm and fuzzy

Itchiness is back though

Ah don't I used to get that all the time when I lived in my flat! One Tesco man couldn't find the flat (really wasn't that hard!!!) and he stood at my door and had a go out me fxxx Witt! Sorry off track!!!
I know it's funny how we are all strangers but virtually probably know more than each other's close friends. Don't know what I'd do without u guys #muchlove :)
Why do they always wait till ur busy till they phone or message when you then spend the whole time thinking arghhhhhhhhh I need to know, and then think of ways you can escape rather than paying any attention to the meeting lol!

Jeez I am so cold!!!

pickle #muchloverightbackatyou
Fricking cold here in North London too.

Seriously considering getting a heated clothes drier
I am actually making some home improvements:

• new floors for communal hall (tomorrow)
• new pipe cover (monday - only taken me 3 years to sort)
• getting quotes for new bathroom
• continuous fight against clutter (am currently losing)

Yeh that's prob a very good idea about the heated drier-especially with more stuff to wash!
Seeing my little nephew tomorrow but desperately need to sort out crap in house! How can u accumulate so much so much stuff. Xmas stuff needs to go in the loft and shed tonne of washing!! then it'll be Monday again 😫(But then nearly Friday wahoooo)

I was out at a friend's birthday and have been dying to read your messages, especially yours kwick! And they didn't disappoint, I'm sooooooooo pleased for you, what a great news

To answer your questions I meant half full bladder for the IUI not the scan and no, I'm not any meds, those follies are growing on their own - no dominant one yet but they will hopefully see one on Monday... I'm visualising them growing

I can totally relate to what you're staying pickle, this group is giving me so much more support and PMA than anyone else - I really appreciate the words I received from all of you to try and calm me down. hoping, thanks for sharing your story, it's a great one even if it must have felt so stressful at the time. I feel better tonight now that I've been to the clinic and had a large glass of wine at the pub

Night all x

pickle it is like I am a clutter magnet... it happens wherever I go (you should see my office at work) and my flat is ready to burst... I have promised that I will bit by bit declutter.

pez LOL... I often sneak a peek when I am on a rare night out. Yep I am addicted to MN!!!
BTW I got a cd by Helen Mcpherson that helps with the visualisation/relaxation part.

What a crap night's sleep. Got woken up repeatedly by neighbours dog (well that is what said neighbour told me it was when I texted him - there was so much banging). Did not feel well either - acid. No chance of a lie-in as have meds delivery due from 8am and no idea when floorers coming. But I am staying in bed, having a cuppa until 7.30 - so there!

Kwick I am SO pleased for you xx